Crazy dreams and too many crossovers.
I have no ties to Farscape, Stargate, Adromeda or their casts' dreams.
Spoilers: Much of Farscape and Adromeda and for Stargate even a little season 10 spoiler
The relationships of Farscape, Stargate, Andromeda and real life cause a fight and some frustration, and a desire to hurt the writers.
Setting: Mitchell/Crichton/Browder's mind. People seem to like frell with his mind no matter what the show.
Mitchell is just trying to find a quiet place to make a move on Dr. Lam when the two of them catch Daniel and Vala together.
"Daniel, get away from my wife now!" said Mitchell.
"That was the last show! and you're the one in trouble, pointing to Lam- she's my real life wife," said Daniel.
"Hey the script tells me, she's mine," said Mitchell. "Plus I have every reason to want Vala. She's like Aeryn if the writers decided to not mess with her head and turn my four years lost in space into one screwed up soap opera except with pulse blasts and power hungry aliens."
(Mitchell and Daniel begin to fight with Vala cheering and teasing, "Who wants to be the father this time!")
Just then the evil Scarran war minister walks and everyone suddenly draws their P-90s, zat guns, and pulse pistols. (Its Crichton's mind, he can't even get the weapons straight)
"You killed me once, but I'll probably be an Ori in this show, and this time your all going to die! I'm sick of Crichton look alikes!" said Scarran war minister.
(With that everyone shoots her with everything they have, but Mitchell starts cracking when the smoke clears)
"What the...Daniel, do we have a f word like frell or frack in this show?" said Mitchell.
"Nope, writers never gave just one since technically we're your normal Earth humans," said Daniel somewhat sarcastically
"Guess its frell then. The minister, she's turned into a human and she looks familiar," said Mitchell.
"Ah, Mitchell we just blasted your real life wife," said Daniel.
"What kind of life do I have when my real life wife is always trying to kill me?" said Mitchell. "I think she also was the calcivore who tried to eat me once and a spy who tried to sell me to Scorpius."
"At least she never actually killed you. Mine did!" said Daniel pointing to Lam. "I got shot right in the chest and my ship blown up. I know was evil, and tried to kill to Tealc but still she killed me!
"The two of you quit your whining! I went from a killer starship and android and leading costar to a recurring role of a doctor who can't even be the one to stop the killer plague," said Lam.
"Yeah, and this show, I'm the one who gets the joy of being burnt alive and giving birth to Satan's child," said Vala.
"Okay this is too much more for me, when is Harvey going to show up and round out this insanity," said Mitchell.
"I don't know, but maybe we should shoot or thank some of the writers for getting our wives and friends parts," said Daniel.
"Maybe eventually they'll get it right, but if I have to take another mind altering drug or implant," said Mitchell
"Or be brought back from the dead," said Vala (Aeryn) and Daniel
"Or get trapped in time," said Lam (Rommie) and Vala (Aeryn)
"Or have to worry about rewriting history!" they all yell.
"I'm either going to shoot the writers or ask for a bigger paycheck!" they say with frustration.
(Ben Browder then wakes up)
"God, I'm asking for a raise, even my dreams are coming straight out of my roles! I wonder if the writers are going to charge me for them." said Browder
The End