Ripping the Scales from Her Eyes
Note: S7 finale AU; Spencer Reid may not be a social genius but he does know human behavior. And this didn't add up right.
Disclaimer: Unless you recognize this story as what actually happened in the S7 finale, CM doesn't belong to me.
In the end, the demise of JJ and Will's relationship wasn't a result of some dramatic event, nor of some Harlequin-worthy speech by someone who'd been pining for JJ for years. It wasn't even the result of a soap opera-esque revelation like an affair or a secret love child or an evil twin. No, it was the result of a friend noticing an anomaly in their friend's normal behavioral patterns and speaking up; solid logic that ripped away all of the veils that JJ had so carefully placed over the cracks in their relationship in an effort to hide them and do what she felt was expected of her, even when, in all honesty, they were suffocating her.
Dr. Spencer Reid sat quietly on the hard plastic of the chair in the hospital waiting room, watching his teammates gush over JJ's revelation that after four years of refusing, she'd agreed to marry Will. Prentiss was grinning and Garcia, of course, was chattering a mile a minute with phrases like 'so perfect for each other' and 'it's about time' spilling out every five seconds. Morgan and Rossi were in on the action too; Rossi already had the gleam in his eye that meant he was planning something. With all of the excitement, Reid figured that he was the only one who'd seen the expression that flashed across Hotch's face for a half-second before he'd offered his congratulations. Reid had seen that expression once before, in New York four years ago, and had hoped to never see it again. He also seemed to be the only one to see the uneasiness that crossed JJ's face with increasing frequency the longer Garcia gushed over plans and dates and dresses. He knew that he was far from fluent in social cues but he was an expert in human behavior. And right now, this situation was showing all of the signs of turning into something that would end in disaster. How many times had any of them said that major life decisions shouldn't be made during times of emotional stress? Hundreds, probably. And yet no one seemed to recognize that JJ was doing just that. Even worse, those decisions were completely out of character for her and that, above anything else, worried him.
When he saw Rossi reach for his cell phone, that gleam in his eye growing by the moment, Reid had a sudden flash of insight; he had to stop Rossi before he did something that could make the situation worse. He got up quickly, crossed over to the older man and asked, "What are you doing?"
Rossi looked at him, "I figured I'd call a wedding planner that I know. Now that they've finally decided to tie the knot I think it would be a nice surprise for them to have everything arranged for as soon as Will gets out of the hospital. They won't have to stress over a thing."
"Are…are you sure that's a good idea?" To Reid, that sounded like the worse idea possible. If Rossi did that, then JJ would not only feel obligated to go through with the wedding for Will's sake but Rossi's as well. How could he talk him out of this?
Something in his expression must have caught the older profiler's attention because his own expression changed to one of concern, "What's eating you kid?" Reid and JJ were pretty tight; if he thought something was off, Rossi would listen.
"It's just…it's just that I'm worried because JJ's been through a lot today. We all know that decisions made under extreme emotion often change once things calm down. I just think that we ought to let her settle down a bit before we spring anything else on her.
Rossi was able to read between the lines and put his phone away with a nod. He'd gotten caught up in the excitement himself and Reid was right, "Ok kid, I'll calm the others down. I take it you're going to talk to JJ?"
"Yeah. It's not that I want to talk her out of it. I just want to make sure she's not going to jump into something that she'll regret."
Rossi nodded and rejoined the conversation; slowly but surely, Garcia's excited chatter slowed down and Reid could see that JJ was starting to wilt. Hotch seemed to have noticed as well because he stepped back towards the group and interrupted the wedding chatter to begin giving instructions and delegating tasks so they could officially close out the case. Will and Henry were both staying in the hospital overnight for observation so it was obvious that JJ would be remaining here. Rossi was sent to tie up any loose ends with the local PD, Morgan, Garcia and Prentiss to complete their reports for turn in the next day. He'd just turned to request that Reid go up to Pediatrics to sit with Henry when Reid interrupted him, "Hotch, I'd…I'd like to stay here with JJ for a bit, if that's okay. She shouldn't be alone right now."
The Unit Chief nodded in agreement, "Alright, I'll head upstairs and will call Strauss from there. Let me know if anything comes up."
"Of course." The two profilers watched until their boss had disappeared into the elevator and then crossed the room to claim seats on a battered brown couch. They sat in silence for a few minutes, Reid watching his friend as she finally able to process the events of the day in full. When he figured that an appropriate amount of time had passed he broke the silence to ask, "JJ, how are you doing?"
She sighed and leaned forward to rest her elbows on her knees, "I'm alright Spence. Will's alive, Henry's safe…and I'm engaged now. I'm fine."
Yeah, that didn't sound like a lie. Unless he was greatly mistaken, JJ was already second-guessing her impulsive acceptance of Will's proposal. Thank goodness that he'd stopped Rossi in time! But he had to tread carefully if he wanted JJ to be honest with him and with herself. He'd noticed over the years that she was almost viscerally afraid of not living up to what she felt peoples' expectations of her were. Morgan referred to it as Catholic Guilt and even though JJ wasn't Catholic, Reid understood the comparison. But it was for everyone's good: hers, Henry's, even Will's, if she was sure of her decision before going any further, "Are you sure JJ? For someone who just got engaged you don't look too happy."
She shot a defensive look at him, "Spence, what are you talking about? Of course I am." How could she admit that was already reconsidering this? She'd only said 'yes' a couple of hours ago! Luckily, Reid understood what she was avoiding saying aloud.
"JJ I'm not trying to tell you what to do. But you've been avoiding this since you were pregnant with Henry. So why now?"
"Because…because he almost died…and he'd just asked before the case started…I feel guilty…he deserves…."
""JJ, guilt isn't a good reason to get married. You were just telling me last week that you two were still fighting over your work schedule. Has he changed his mind about wanting you to quit the BAU?"
That made her scoff, "Of course not!" Her work schedule was the thing they fought most about, though it was far from the only thing and Reid knew it; she'd vented to him enough times that there was no way she could deny it.
"Have you changed your mind?"
"No…Spence, what are you trying to say here?"
Well, here it went, "JJ, you're not happy. You've been with Will for years now and you've fought most of that time, especially about work. But you've had Henry, so you've stayed with him. But marriage isn't going to make the problems go away. They'll probably get worse. You'll still fight about work and that won't stop until one of you changes your mind…or until you give in and quit. You know I love you like a sister and I'll support whatever you decide to do. I just want to make sure that you're certain that this is what you want. Not what Will wants, but you.
"Henry…."
"Henry will adapt to whatever happens. But how happy can he be if you're not, if you and Will are always fighting?"
A stricken look crossed JJ's face before she dissolved into tears which, for some reason, caught Reid off guard. She never cried, at least not in front of him. He put an awkward arm around her shoulder in an attempt at comfort…he sucked at dealing with crying women. But now the scales had fallen from her eyes and she could see the situation clearly. She and Will would never agree on her working: she wanted to work, needed to work but he wanted a housewife. What had been a fling snowballed into living together when Henry was born and she'd stayed with him since for Henry's sake. But Reid was right; how happy would Henry be in a house where his parents were fighting all the time? She'd acted on adrenaline, something they constantly cautioned others against doing. Thank goodness that Reid had said something before she'd made the situation even worse. She knew what she had to do. "You're absolutely right Spence, on everything. Thank you."
"I'm sorry I made you cry JJ. I didn't mean to hurt you. But I want you to be happy."
"I know Spence, I know. Thank you." She gave him a tight hug and then pulled back with a sigh, "I'd better go talk to Will. I feel awful; this is going to break his heart. But you're right, we would both be miserable in the end."
"You have to think about and do what's best for you JJ. I know you; you tend to think of everyone else first. You need to think about your own needs sometimes. No matter what happens, it'll all work out in the end."
JJ nodded, sighed and got to her feet, "I'll be back in a bit." Reid watched her head down the hall and felt a twinge of guilt. He did like Will and hated that he'd be hurt in the next few minutes. But in the long run, he knew it would be the best thing for all of them. And for JJ's sake, he'd do his best to head off the worst of the team's questions for her. She was already feeling guilty enough.
As it turned out, JJ took a few days off after speaking with Will so he was able to calm the worst of Garcia's disbelief and laments before she could air them in front of JJ herself. Instead, Rossi helped JJ find a new apartment closer to work and the team spent a weekend helping her move in. Overall, Reid figured that he'd gotten the better end of the bargain when it came to dealing with an upset woman; Garcia and Prentiss had been shocked at the breakup but not outraged. Hotch, on the other hand, was the only one who could calm JJ down when Henry had told her just why he wasn't upset over the move (though he was a bit confused as to why Will wasn't moving too.) If Will hadn't already been in the hospital JJ might have put him there herself when she found out all of the details of that day and just how the unsubs got to Henry in the first place. Yeah, he'd been quite happy to watch Jack and Henry while Hotch calmed JJ down….it was safer!
When JJ returned to work the following week Reid could honestly say that she looked more relaxed than he'd seen her in a long time. Even the drama that occurred a week or so later when Hotch's (now ex-) girlfriend showed up in an attempt to 'fix' their relationship didn't seem to faze her…if anything, she seemed more amused than anything else. But then again, she talked to Hotch almost as much as she did Garcia, so maybe the news of their breakup hadn't been as much of a surprise to her as it was to the rest of them. Henry was settling into his new routine and Will, while rather pissed over the breakup, was wise enough not to fight JJ too much. Reid figured that once the initial sting of embarrassment over her ending the relationship passed he'd realized the same thing that JJ had: their expectations of a relationship were too different. And with the stress of a rocky relationship gone, JJ looked happy again. Other than cases, all was calm in the BAU team's world.
Well, at least until the next surprise came….
A/N: Reid didn't seem to care for the complete loss of the team's collective common sense and knowledge of human behavior in planning a surprise wedding for someone, especially under those circumstances. And since he wouldn't leave me alone, here it is.