Written for Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Herbology Assignment 11.
Task: Write about something or someone that can be either harmful or healing to someone or something else.
Word Count: 378
Extra Prompt used:
5. (word) painful
Dedicated to Frank Waters, as I had promised to write a fanfic on Sirius Black for the winner of a game.
Guilt
You stare at the ruins, which had once been the home to girlish giggles and babyish gurgles; the place that was your second home.
You feel your chest tighten, your heart hammers against your ribs, and your massive black body floats into nothingness as you close your eyes. The image of the man that was a brother to you in all but blood floats in front of your eyes. You think of the woman who was a mother, a sister, and a friend—a complete package deal. You think of the child you used to hold in your arms lovingly, whose first word was you.
You want to curl up in a corner and cry yourself to death when you realise that the green-eyed baby is a teenager now, and wouldn't even recognise you. You wonder if he even knows who you are, or if he hates you because of what you did.
You've heard people say, 'Time heals all wounds', but thirteen years of Azkaban haven't at all dimmed your feelings about the loss of your friends. The memories of that warm lively light before the sudden darkness of death is as painful to you as it was all those years had come to the same place, only to find the hollow shell of your friend sprawled across the floor, unseeing eyes glaring at you, as if saying, 'You could have saved us, Padfoot.'
You look back to the years that have passed; each passing second had only worsened the pain of losing the ones you loved. Time never served as a remedy to your wounds, it just destroyed you bit by bit.
You think of Moony; his loss is greater than yours. He lost everyone in a single night. You feel guilty for not being there for him, and letting yourself get arrested. You feel the hair at your collar stand up as you think of the nights under a full moon that he must have spent alone, with neither you nor Prongs to take care of him.
The sound of footfalls approaching alert you, and your ears perk up. Your legs carry you away from the ruins, but your heart is still there, waiting for the day you'll be re-united with your friend.