Author's Note
Okay, I can never seem to regularly update my pathetic stories but I will update them eventually and if you are getting impatient then review or email me and I'll try my best to update ASAP. Okay I got this idea while daydreaming in geometry so don't be too harsh when you review hint, hint so I'll shut up about now and get on with the intro.
Oh, by the way. The chapter name is what I am doing instead of a date. Like the first one is "Christmas" since I hate dates so each entry will sorta have a title. Less journal-like but I hate trying to remember dates and junk, so sorry about the long A/N but it is a necessary evil.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or places in the wonderful Harry potter series. And you would realize that if you thought about it. I am publishing my work on the Internet for free instead of sending it to a publisher and becoming a very rich woman.
Introduction
It took Harry a while to realize what he was holding. At first it just appeared to be a small, thin, green book, nothing of significance. Hermione, who was beside him had picked it up, gasped and tapped him very hard with her index finger. "Harry look at this! Look at this!" she had begun to wave it in his face excitedly.
"I know Hermione it is a book I saw, please we're almost done" he pushed it aside and tried to begin working again.
"No!" she said sounding exasperated, "Actually look at it!" Harry grabbed it slightly annoyed. He say at first exactly what he say before, a dark green leather book. But what caught his eye were silver shining words at the bottom, "The Journal of Lily Evans" Harry's eyes widened in awe.
"Is this really the.." he was so shocked he could hardly talk. "My mum's journal I can't.. why.. how.." Harry was almost in tears.
"Yes I do believe it is real, but I don't know why it's here of all places." They were in Grimuald Place cleaning it out after Sirius's death. "Wouldn't it have been in Godric's Hollow?" Hermione had gotten closer to see to book in Harry's hands.
"It doesn't matter, it's just…"
"What?"
"I .. I just can't believe it's my mother's journal I can have access into my mother's thoughts." He sighed, "I don't know what I should do with it." He dropped it into his lap and opened it. "I just don't know if I would want to know what I would read. I know that most journals are never meant to be read, I am sure it is the same with this one."
"It is your journal now Harry. It was in Sirius's attic and the will said the house and everything in it was to go to you, and this is in the house so.."
"Hermione." Said Harry, "This is more difficult that legal papers. This is something my mother wrote, thought, felt, I could find things out I never needed to know..," Hermione put her hand up and nodded as a way of saying 'I understand' Harry stood and left the room still thinking.
Harry sat on his bed staring at the journal in his hands a battle going through his head.
'It is your mother's journal, you DO have a right to read it.'
Oh but it must be personal.
'You never knew your mother it is your first and maybe only chance!'
Since I never knew her I would not know if she would MIND or not!
'You might find out be reading it."
I might not too. But I might also learn other things I never wanted to know! I mean I looked at the front she wrote her age and it was when she still hated my father!
'You know she didn't always hate him! You are her son!'
I don't think I should!'You need to!'
Oh!
'Fine don't read it it's up to you. This fight is stupid. Your arguing with yourself.'
But it might be my last chance!
'Then read it!'
Oh! I, I guess I will.
'Good!'
But what if she wouldn't want me to!
It went on like that for a long time. In circles and circles until Harry wanted to punch the person he was arguing with before he remembered he was fighting himself. Finally when he went to bed he decided reading it wouldn't hurt him, if anything it might even be good. So he slept dreaming about what he would soon discover about the mother he never knew.