Old Friends, New Beginnings

Isilarma

I was watching TOS and AOS and then saw the Doctor Who Christmas Special. This was the result. Hope you all enjoy it!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

It was all over the news. How a crew of cadets under the command of James T. Kirk had saved Earth from suffering the same fate as Vulcan. How Kirk had been named Captain, and given command of one of the most famous vessels of the Fleet. How the Enterprise was even now preparing to depart on its new missions. Even among the Vulcan refugees, Kirk and the Enterprise were a matter for discussion.

One Vulcan in particular had followed the story with great attention.

Spock watched the broadcasts. He saw Jim standing tall, fairly glowing with happiness as his command was announced. He saw Dr. McCoy by his side, glowering at the cameras, but unable to completely hide his pride. He saw his younger self, standing just behind them in a way that made Spock's heat ache.

They were not as he remembered. They didn't trust each other, didn't anticipate each other as he used to. He had to wonder if they even liked each other. It was understandable of course. They had come to meet each other far earlier than he had originally. They lacked the experience and the maturity to look past the surface differences to see the things they had in common. It would take time to develop the bond that Spock remembered.

He couldn't help but wonder if Nero's arrival had caused more damage than he had anticipated.

"I thought I'd find you here."

Spock froze. He knew that voice. Schooling his expression with the ease of long practice, he turned round. "I did not know if you would be able to find me again."

His visitor just grinned at him. "Now you should have known better than that."

Spock inclined his head. "So I see." After a moment he allowed himself to relax slightly. "It is good to see you, Doctor."

The Doctor's grin became, if possible, even wider. "Likewise, Mr. Spock."

If he were anyone else, Spock would have smiled. He hadn't known the Doctor well, but he had visited enough, and saved their lives often enough, that he wasn't ashamed of the pleasure the visit gave him. It was good to see an old friend. The Doctor slumped into a chair opposite him and crossed his legs. "Thought I'd check by, see how you were doing." His eyes searched Spock's with startling intensity. "Make sure everything was all right."

Spock raised an eyebrow. "I assure you, I am quite well."

The Doctor looked at him. "You sure about that?"

Spock knew better than to hide things from him. For the first time since this whole fiasco had happened, he allowed the faintest glimmer of his weariness to shine through. "I am as well as can be expected."

The Doctor nodded, sympathy clearly visible in his eyes. "It's not been easy."

Spock's eyes narrowed. The Doctor looked the same as he ever did, but the length of their acquaintance worked both ways and Spock knew him better than that. He could see the weariness in his eyes and in the slump of his shoulders. Something had happened. And Spock could guess what was wrong.

"And how is Miss Tyler?"

The way the Doctor tensed told him his guess was correct. The Doctor knew that too, for his sharp look turned to a resigned one. "Never could fool you," he muttered. He sighed and tilted his head back. "She's fine. Alive, healthy."

"But not with you."

The Doctor looked away. "I couldn't reach her."

"Tushah nash-veh k'odu," said Spock softly.

The Doctor shot him a small smile. "Yes, I suppose you do."

Spock closed his eyes for a moment. He did understand, maybe more than anyone else could. After all, his own loved ones were far out of reach. "They are alive," he said softly.

The Doctor sighed again. "That's not enough."

Spock didn't reply. Logically knowing their loved ones were alive and reasonably safe would be enough. But Spock's human side rather vehemently disagreed with that assessment, and if Spock had learned anything in his long life, it was that his human side wasn't always wrong.

But what could they do about it? Rose was lost, and Spock knew better than to interfere with his younger self and his friends.

Of course, knowing what to do didn't make it any easier.

Abruptly, the Doctor shook his head. "Not helping," he muttered. "Can't change it now."

Spock glanced at him, but the expression on his face warned Spock not to ask further, so he just nodded. "Indeed."

The Doctor visibly relaxed, slouching even deeper into his chair. "So, do you want to want to tell me what else is bothering you?"

Spock was silent for a long moment before he replied. "This timeline was altered considerably by Nero's actions. My younger self, Jim, the rest of the crew... Everything has changed."

"Even Starfleet," said the Doctor quietly.

Spock nodded. "I cannot predict what the future has in store."

The Doctor met his gaze steadily. "Maybe that's for the best."

Spock bowed his head. As much as he would have liked to assist his younger self and his friends, he knew that that would not They had to learn to trust in themselves and in each other, rather than relying on 'cheating' as Jim would call it. Then again, Jim had never been adverse to cheating. "Indeed."

The Doctor scuffed the floor with his foot. "Of course, it wouldn't hurt to make hints."

Spock frowned at him. "Hints."

"Yeah. You know, maybe mention to Dr. McCoy that he might want to start looking into certain terminal diseases, that sort of thing."

Spock's breath caught in his throat. "You would not object to that?"

The Doctor shrugged. "He lived before because you were in the right place at the right time and that was what was supposed to happen."* He stretched and clasped his hands behind his head. "I'm sure you can think of a few other little suggestions you could make."

Spock nodded slowly, the possibilities already filling his mind. "Indeed."

The Doctor flashed him a brilliant grin. "Good." He got to his feet. Spock followed suit.

"You are leaving."

The Doctor nodded, digging his hands deep into the pockets of his greatcoat. "Well, you know. Places to go, things to do." His smile faded slightly. "People to meet." For a moment he looked every bit as old as Spock knew him to be, then he shook his head and the grin was back in place. "And you've got planning to do."

Spock inclined his head. "Quite." He hesitated a moment, then held out his hand. The Doctor blinked at him, but Spock met his gaze without flinching. Slowly, giving Spock every opportunity to draw away, the Doctor took it.

Loneliness. Pain. Loss. An overwhelming despair at being alone, at losing the only people who understood. The emotions rose up, so violently that Spock could not tell which were his and which were the Doctor's, and for once he did not try to suppress them.

It only lasted a moment before two sets of shields slammed into place. The Doctor drew in a deep breath and dropped his hand. "Wow. That was different." Despite his light tone, his eyes burned with an intensity that made even Spock draw back slightly.

"I apologise, Doctor," he began, but the Doctor shook his head.

"I am honoured," he said quietly.

Spock looked away. "It was logical."

Amusement, so similar to the glee that had so often lit another doctor's eyes, danced in the Doctor's face. "Of course." He raised his hand in the Vulcan salute. "Live long and prosper, Mr Spock."

Spock reciprocated the gesture. "Peace and long life."

The Doctor lowered his hand and smiled. "Well, I'm sure I'll see you around."

Spock raised an eyebrow. "Which one of us?"

The grin widened. "Why not both?"

Spock watched him leave. He did know when, or if they would meet again. He knew how dangerous the Doctor's life could be, and Jim, and McCoy for that matter, had both called him a magnet for trouble often enough. But despite that, his heart felt lighter than it had since he arrived in this time.

For in that moment of pain and fear, Spock had felt something else. Something buried deep beneath all the loss.

Hope.

Things could never be again as they had been. Too much had changed.

But not all changes had to be bad.

Tushah nash-veh k'odu – I grieve with thee

*In TOS McCoy contracted a fatal disease called xenopolycythemia, but they found a cure during a chance encounter with an alien race. Since everything is different now, it might be better to be prepared.

Any feedback would be very much appreciated.