A song on how Harley feels deep down and her feelings about her relationship with Joker

Harley: "Hey I aint a cry baby I just have deep thoughts!"

Harley sat on the bed her knees tucked up under her chin she was covered in bruises, lumps and cuts. Her other outfit was in tatters on the floor so she had changed into another but removed her hat, mask and make-up.

She was fed up with being beaten, abused, manipulated and lied to by the man she thought CARED about her but it felt like she was taken for granted and a waste of space. She reached over and turned on the radio gently to which a song began playing.

"Made a wrong turn once or twice"

"Aint that the truth Mistah-J is always yelling at me when I do something wrong" Harley thought sadly.

"Dug my way out blood and fire"

"More times than I can count" Harley muttered irritably. Every time she and Joker had been trapped somewhere he had dumped her ass and escaped leaving her to get out alone the HARD way.

"Bad decisions that's alright"

That line tore Harley open she had made one too many bad decisions falling for Joker, allowing him to treat her the way he did, throwing away her career for a criminal lifestyle, abandoning Ivy for Joker.

"Welcome to my silly life"

"So true" Harley laughed sadly. Her life wasn't perfect but it was the one she chose and it was too late to change she KNEW what she wanted and it wasn't a working at Arkham.

"Mistreated, Misplaced, Misunderstood"

Harley clenched her fists tightly as she thought of the never ending abuse she had received since she had begun working for Joker. He made fun of her, taunted her and beat her until she was barely conscious. He left her in several places intentionally while he escaped leaving her to fend for herself or even get locked up in Arkham (again). The worst part was she would try do something good to make him proud of her and she would end up getting the hard wrath of his fist or backhand sometimes even being kicked, thrown or pushed.

"Miss no way, it's all good"

Harley hugged herself tightly she ALWAYS told herself everything was fine but in reality it wasn't she was forever scared that when Joker got mad at her it was her last living moment especially when he tried to kill her it made her life all the more valuable.

"It didn't slow me down"

That was correct no matter how bad or terrible life seemed she was always back on her feet again and kicking batman and boy blunder's butt with ease.

"Mistaken, always second guessing"

Harley was forever wrong when she thought Joker would spend time with her instead he would sit in his office most of the day, drink whiskey and gamble with his friends. This would leave her feeling that he either didn't care about her, wanted some headspace or wasn't in the mood for sex.

"Underestimated, Look I'm still around"

Words clear as a bell, as true as her feelings for Joker she had been given only a month of lasting until she would be done in but it had been at least 3 years.

"Pretty pretty please don't you ever, ever feel"

Feel what? Where was she supposed to start many feelings rushed through her mind and body like a storm.

"Like your less than fucking perfect"

Harley clenched her fists she was PERFECT in her own way she wasn't some plain Jane with a boring life I mean who else had pet Hyena's and a qualification in gymnastics.

"Pretty pretty please if you ever, ever feel"

Harley held her breath what would this angry yet helpful song say next that would lift her spirits higher than a cloud.

"Like your nothing, you're fucking perfect to me"

"That's right I am!" Harley snapped she wasn't a nobody if she was she would still be Dr. Harleen Quinzelle working at Arkham for the rest of her life.

"You're so mean (mean) when you talk (when you talk)

"I aint mean ok sure I tease but I aint a bad person!" Harley snapped crossly.

"About yourself. You were wrong"

Harley went quiet she did talk about herself a lot saying she didn't deserve Joker or that she didn't belong anywhere but that wasn't true.

"Change the voices (change the voices) in your head (In your head)"

"But how they all sound so different?" Harley sighed sadly.

"Make them like you instead"

Harley perked up a little making the voices sound like her would make her happier in so many ways then she wouldn't be sad anymore.

"So complicated"

Life was complicated for Harley. She couldn't LEAVE Joker as she loved him too much and he would be sad without her but staying would mean abuse and no respect. It was a difficult choice and tough love.

"Look how we all make it"

As a doctor Harley had heard things from people she never knew they could some had even scared her deep down but were they really just scared and angry themselves?

"Filled with so much hatred"

The hatred never ended it was like a loop going round and round. Ivy hated Joker, Joker hated batman, batman hated Joker and Joker and herself hated each other (at times).

"Such a tired game"

It was true facing the music the game Joker played was never ending and he hadn't beaten Batman yet maybe he never would.

"It's enough I've done all I can think of"

Harley had appeared out of a pie, almost killed batman, almost shot Joker but none of it had earned respect. They had surprised, angered and pleased him but not made him respect her in any way.

"Chased down all my demons"

If only that were true Harley was faced with so many faces of herself when she was alone but she just couldn't face them because she got scared and upset. Her demons were not as nearly as bad as Jokers but they weren't normal either.

The song continued with many other lyrics but Harley blacked them all out as they either made no reference to her or Joker and she had heard them before. But she was too upset to care, too tired to listen she just wanted to sleep.

That evening

Joker entered the warehouse after returning from Harvey's for drinks and man talk. He felt guilty for hurting Harley as bad as he did but she was such a pain in the ass sometimes that she was just asking for it. He heard sniffling coming from the bedroom and went to investigate and found Harley's ripped costume on the floor from their previous fight making him feel worse about his actions.

Joker peered through the doorway to see Harley lying on the bed with her face in her pillow sobbing quietly wearing a new Harlequin suit. His heart sank he LOVED her smile compared to her tears it just made her who she was.

"Harley" Joker said firmly but in a gentle tone pushing the bedroom door open.

Harley froze but didn't move position what if he was STILL mad and was going to hit her the thought made her feel even more fearful. She knew that she couldn't say something that wouldn't piss him off so she remained silent.

Joker sighed heavily and sat on the bedside slowly "Pooh we need to talk" he said stroking her blonde waves.

Harley wriggled a little then git up sighing sadly "Yeah we do" she said sadly.

Joker was stunned at her appearance her left cheek was swollen, she had a black eye and a cut lip. He had been angrier than he thought he REALLY made her cry this time.

Joker pulled her onto his lap to which Harley winced and hissed in pain "Harley?" he said concerned.

"It's ok Puddin I just covered up my owies" Harley said smiling but her eyes looked sad.

Joker unzipped her back and pulled down her costume flashing her body to which Harley shrieked and tried to fight him off but he was adamant.

Her chest was black and blue her back had scrapes and cuts she must have been in so much pain and HE caused it. A part of his heart was torn from him as he thought about the pain she endured.

Harley looked away shamefully as she hated to show him her weaknesses and what he did to her. Joker didn't want a cry-baby he wanted a strong woman who could fight and look after herself but was still clingy.

Joker stroked her body making her wince "So many marks...and I CAUSED them" Joker said quietly looking ashamed.

"I'm used to it Puddin but pain is something you can't throw away" Harley said softly.

Joker pulled Harley close and stroked her hair "Harley" he said softly.

Harley clung to his waist jacket "Mistah-J" she whispered softly.

"I'm sorry...I hurt you and I LEFT you again" Joker said his voice cracking.

Harley cupped his face in her hands "That's what happens when you love a psychopathic clown" she said her blue eyes loving.

"Harley" Joker said gently and kissed her lips lovingly. No matter what she did or what she said he would never stop loving her.

Harley closed her eyes and kissed him back running her hands through his greenish-black hair. She breathed in his familiar scent that she loved.

They were a crazy Psychotic couple but somehow it worked in a way nobody would understand.