I don't own Percy Jackson and the Olympians or Doctor Who. I do own Ashley, Natalia Isabelle Jackson, Cal, Aaron, Eliza, Matt, June, and Sarah.
Stars and Soldiers
"All passengers please fasten your seat belts for landing."
The captain's voice sounded over the intercom, and the plane was filled with the sounds of people waking up and the snaps of fastening seat belts. A few children started talking excitedly as the noticed the ground coming closer.
Thalia already had her seat belt on. She hated flying with a passion. She gripped the armrests tightly and tried not to look out the window at the ground rushing up to meet them. Instead she thought of her friend's face the last time they'd seen each other, eighteen months ago. A smile graced her lips.
The plane bumped as it touched down, and Thalia relaxed. She grabbed the small bag she'd brought on board and began making her way out with the throng. When she'd made it out, she grabbed her duffel bag from the luggage cart and threw it over one shoulder. It was heavy, but compared with what she'd been carrying for the past year and a half, this was nothing.
Thalia made her way through the crowds of people, searching for a head of blonde hair. Unfortunately, she'd forgotten that this was America – there were a lot of blondes. She hadn't seen many blondes in a while.
She sighed and ran a hand through her hair, wondering how in Hell she was supposed to find her ride home. Home. God, that's where she wanted to be. She wanted to go home. But that wasn't going to happen if she didn't find her ride.
And it didn't help that Annabeth was short. Terrifying, yes, and very smart, but not particularly tall. She had a way of fooling people into thinking that she was taller than them. It was always a shock for them to find out that she was really a few inches shorter than average.
But she was resourceful, which was why, when Thalia found her, she was standing on a bench, holding a sign that said "Grace".
"I'm gonna kill you," Thalia said, looking up at her friend.
Annabeth jumped. She'd been looking over the heads of the people in front of her, trying to stop Thalia, and had missed Thalia's approach. When she saw her best friend, she grinned and jumped down to hug Thalia.
"Don't call me Grace," Thalia said, trying for a grumble and ending up with more of a chuckle.
Annabeth laughed. "Shut up." She pulled back to look into Thalia's eyes. "I missed you."
"I missed you too."
They stood in silence for a moment, until Annabeth looked down and said, "Oh God, you must be sweltering."
"It's not bad. Afghanistan's worse."
"Still! Come on, you can get changed at home."
Thalia didn't look around at the stares they were getting. She didn't want to see. If they thought a woman in camo was strange, then they could go fuck themselves. She'd been through more than they could imagine.
Thalia dropped her bag on the bed in her best friend's and cousin's guestroom, then fell onto the bed next to it. She was exhausted. She'd barely done anything all day, just sat on a plane mostly, but she was exhausted anyway.
She lay there for a few minutes, then picked herself up and began taking off her clothes to change. She'd pulled off her shirt and slipped on a black t-shirt when she heard a knock on the door.
When she opened the door, she was assaulted by a man with black hair and a green shirt. It took her a moment to realize that it was her cousin, but by that point she'd already kicked his legs out from under him and was kneeling on his chest. He was laughing.
"Nice to see you too."
She rolled her eyes. "Don't attack me, you idiot." She stood up and reached down to help him off the floor.
He took her hand and stood up, still laughing. "I didn't attack you! Jesus, Thalia, don't you know what a hug is?"
"I know what a hug is, and that wasn't one." She turned around and went back into the guest room. "And you shouldn't surprise people who've just come from a combat zone."
She expected a witty reply, but instead she got an awkward silence. She sighed, then threw a grin over her shoulder. Percy had gone pale, and he was staring at her left hand.
"Sorry," he said quietly.
Thalia rolled her eyes. "Oh, for God's sake, Percy, I was kidding. You didn't surprise me. I heard you coming. You've got the stealth skills of an elephant."
He smiled, but it was half-hearted. His eyes finally moved up to meet hers. Then he glanced down at her shirt. "Get changed. You look better in black."
She raised an eyebrow. "Did you just give me fashion advice?"
"Shut up, Grace."
"Don't call me that, Perseus."
Percy narrowed his eyes at her. "Screw you," he said finally. He turned around and left the room.
"Being a father's really limited your vocabulary!" Thalia called after him through the closed door. She heard an answering chuckle.
She sat back down on the bed, thoughts of getting changed gone. She held her left hand in her right and stared down at it. Everything was different, ever since she got back. They were different. They treated her like she was different, like she was made of glass. Like anything they said could set off some sort of bomb. They were afraid of her.
Maybe they were right to be.
Thalia leaned forward and rested her head in her hands. She didn't want to be afraid. She didn't want them to be afraid. Especially not of her.
She took a deep breath, then stood up and began taking off her pants to trade them for a pair of black skinny jeans. Annabeth had mentioned a party that night. Thalia wasn't sure what it was for, but there would be people there – normal, boring, regular people. And that was exactly what she was in the mood for.
There was a knock on the door.
Nico took a deep breath before he turned around. It was Friday, damn it, he wanted to go home. But he had to be civil to the girl standing in the doorway – he was her teacher after all.
"Bonjour," the girl said.
Nico smiled. "Bonjour, Ashley."
"I just needed a little help on the homework. I know it's a little late, but…"
"Non, non, c'est bien. What did you need?"
"Just…" She gave him an apologetic smile, "I don't get the past participle."
Internally, Nico sighed again. He'd gone over the past participle what felt like a million times with Ashley's class, and half of them were just too thick to get it. Honestly, sometimes he didn't understand why he had to bother teaching these kids. It was just part of teaching at a public school, he supposed.
But Ashley really did try, she just had trouble, so he tried to help her as much as he could.
Not today, though. "I'm sorry, Ashley, I actually have somewhere I need to be," he lied. "Just do your best, okay? We'll go over it again in class."
"Okay. Thanks, Mr. di Angelo." She smiled again and turned to leave the classroom.
Nico went back to packing up his grading to take home over the weekend. He'd put two folders in his bag when Ashley said, "Mr. di Angelo?"
"Yes?"
"Do you have a girlfriend?"
His eyes widened, and to his embarrassment he sputtered a bit. "I…what?"
"We were talking about it at lunch. I said I thought you did, but Kate said you didn't, 'cause you wouldn't be such a hard ass if you did." She grinned sheepishly. "Sorry, language, I know."
Nico blinked and tried to compose himself. "I…uh…I don't. No."
Ashley's eyebrows shot up to her hairline, which would have been funny if it weren't for the subject at hand. "Really? But…you're so nice. How come you haven't got a girlfriend?"
"I'm fairly sure that isn't your business, Ashley, but I have a job and a family, and that's more than enough. And I'm going to be late if I don't get going, so…"
Ashley shrugged. "Okay. D'you mind if I tell Kate you do? 'Cause I bet her ten bucks, and I haven't got ten bucks to give her."
"Sure, whatever you'd like, did you need anything else?"
"Nope. Au revoir, Monsieur."
Nico winced at her accent, but luckily her back was turned. "Au revoir, Mademoiselle."
He stuffed a few more folders in his bag, and headed out the door. There was a cup of hot chocolate and a season of Doctor Who at home calling his name.
The phone rang in the middle of Blink, and Nico considered not answering because this was his favorite episode ever. But caller ID revealed that it was Percy calling, so with a groan Nico paused the TV and picked up his cellphone.
"What," he grumbled – not a question, but a complaint.
"You have to come over tonight," Percy said. "We're having a party, and my mom is taking Nat, and you have to meet my cousin, she just flew in today..."
"Percy."
"Yeah?"
"I'm not going to a party. I'm exhausted."
"Come on, di Angelo, you're twenty-four years old and it's a Friday night. When'd you get boring?"
"I'm not boring, I'm an adult."
Percy groaned. "There's no rule that says adults have to be boring. Come on, please?"
Nico sighed, rubbed a hand over his face, then peaked through his fingers at the TV, where Sally Sparrow was standing in a garage with a black man and looking at a blue police box. As much as he wanted to stay and watch more, he hadn't seen Percy outside of work in weeks, and one party couldn't hurt. Much.
"Alright, alright, fine."
Percy cheered, and was quickly chastised by his wife in the background. "Nat's sleeping!" Nico heard her hiss.
"Sorry," Percy whispered back. "Party's at seven, don't be too late."
"Sure." They said their goodbyes, and Nico hung up the phone. He threw it down on the table and collapsed back against his pillows, groaning. He wasn't looking forward to this.
Then again, Percy's parties could sometimes be a lot of fun.
And there was always so much blackmail material to be caught on tape.
Thalia ran a hand through her hair and stared at herself in the mirror. She looked pretty good, if she said so herself. It'd been a while since she'd had the time to do things like this – put on makeup, carefully pick out an outfit, make her hair look nice. She was wearing black skinny jeans and a black t-shirt, with a black button up over it that she'd left unbuttoned. There wasn't much she could do to hide her hand, but her scars were different. She was proud of them, but they weren't conversations she really wanted to have. And people would ask questions.
Her hair was short. It hung just above her shoulders, and was jet black. Her eyes were rimmed with liner, which she hadn't done in months (it wasn't against protocol, she just never bothered – it seemed a bit pointless, but sometimes pointless things were nice). Her eyelids had been brushed with silver eyeshadow, and her lips were a few shades darker than normal.
She almost felt like she was back in high school.
She smoothed her shirt down one more time before leaving the bathroom. There were already a few people there, taking drinks from the cooler in the middle of the room and mingling. She didn't know any of them.
"Thalia!" Suddenly a hand grabbed her wrist, and her other hand twitched before she reminded herself that no one here wanted to hurt her. She turned to see Percy's smiling face. "Come on, I have people you need to meet!"
"I don't want to meet anyone, Percy. I'm good."
He rolled his eyes. "God, you're just as bad as Nico." She didn't ask who Nico was. "Come on, Thalia, it's a party. Socialize. Do you want something to drink?"
She shook her head. She didn't intend to have any alcohol tonight.
"Water?"
"Sure."
She allowed herself to be led away from the wall and towards the people in the center of the room.
Two hours later found her near the wall again, just observing. Percy and Annabeth were trying to play the friendly hosts, but they kept getting distracted by each other. It seemed that they hadn't had much time alone for a while. Percy sat on the window sill with a drink in one hand and his wife on his lap. They were deep in quiet conversation, and they made Thalia smile with their small gestures – Percy trailed his hand up and down Annabeth's leg, and she brushed her own hand over his cheek and neck.
"They're sickening, aren't they?"
Thalia turned to see a man standing beside her. He was holding a glass of red liquid and leaning against her wall. He wore dark pants and a deep red button up shirt. His hair was dark, and so were his eyes. He was staring in the direction of Percy and Annabeth.
"They just got rid of their daughter for the night. I think anyone would be happy."
He chuckled. "I guess a two year old is a lot to handle." He lifted the glass to his lips, took a sip, then brought it back down. "Though I wouldn't know."
"No kids?"
"Plenty of kids. None of them mine."
He looked to his right and saw the look Thalia was giving him. "I'm a teacher," he explained, then held out his hand. "Nico di Angelo."
"Oh, you're Nico!" He raised an eyebrow. "Uh, Percy was talking about you."
"Good things?"
"He said you were boring."
"Average things then."
Thalia chuckled and took his outstretched hand. "Thalia Grace."
"Pleasure to meet you, Miss Grace," he said with a twinkle in his eye. "So how do you know the happy couple?"
"I'm Percy's cousin."
"Oh, he mentioned you, I think. He said you'd just flown in."
Thalia looked down at her water. "Yeah," she said quietly. She didn't want to have this conversation. So far every time she'd mentioned anything to do with her job, whoever she'd been talking to had closed themselves off. She didn't want Nico to do that.
"Where are you from?"
"Here. I was doing some work in Asia."
Nico looked intrigued. "Really?"
"Yeah." She cleared her throat. "So what do you teach?"
He smirked, and she knew he'd noticed how she'd changed the subject, but he answered anyway. "French. High school French."
"Wow. So you're bilingual?"
"Tri, actually."
"Is that really a thing? Trilingual?"
Nico grinned and nodded. "Yeah, I was born in Italy and I moved to America when I was ten. But my parents wouldn't let me use Italian as my mandatory language in high school, so I chose French instead. I guess I was pretty good at it."
"Aren't French and Italian really similar?"
"You'd be surprised at how different they are, actually. But they're both Romance languages, so they do sound pretty similar."
"I always wished I could speak another language." She was actually pretty good at Arabic, having spent some time in the Middle East, and she knew some Farsi from the Afghan translators, but bringing something like that up would cause questions to be asked.
"I could teach you if you wanted," he said, and smiled.
Jesus Christ, he was flirting with her.
Thalia was caught a bit off guard. She'd never been good at flirting, even in high school. To be honest, she hadn't really had much interest in boys. Or anyone, really.
"Um, yeah, that…that'd be pretty cool."
Nico laughed. "You don't do this a lot, huh?"
Thalia grimaced. "Is it obvious?"
"Yeah. But don't worry, I don't either."
"You're pretty good for someone who doesn't do it much."
He gave her a dramatic bow. "Thank you, m'lady."
"A little dated, maybe."
They both laughed, and then settled back against the wall.
Thalia looked down at her drink and sighed. "How long do you think this thing will last?"
"The drink or the party?"
"Party."
He shrugged. "I don't know. I probably won't hang around much longer."
"God, I wish I didn't have to. I'm staying here tonight."
"Ooh. I don't envy you."
"Thanks."
Thalia took another sip of her water.
Nico suddenly found his own drink to be very interesting. "If you wanted, you could come stay with me."
She looked at him. "Wait, seriously?"
He shrugged. "I haven't got a roommate or anything, and I've got a guest bedroom. If you wanted to stay over tonight you could."
She gaped at him for a moment, then set her glass down and threw her arms around his neck. "I think you're officially my new favorite person in the world."
Nico laughed, then took her hand. He dropped it a moment later. She sighed. It was already starting again.
"Sorry, sorry, I didn't even see…"
"It's fine," she sighed. "Don't worry. Happens all the time."
Nico swallowed and tried very hard not to be awkward when he gestured for her to follow him and led her out the door to his car. The ride to his apartment was quiet. Nico didn't know what to say to this girl. She was beautiful, and funny, and she seemed to be able to hold a decent conversation. But there was something strange about her – he felt like she was hiding something. She'd changed the subject when he'd started talking about her work in Asia. He'd wanted to ask her about it – she was working in Asia, how cool was that – but she'd looked so uncomfortable with the topic that he hadn't said anything.
When they got to Nico's apartment building, he led Thalia up the stairs ("Elevator's broken. I don't know if it's ever worked.") and to his door, where he pulled out his key and opened the door for her.
"Sorry it's such a mess," Nico said, leading the way down the hall to the kitchen. "My level fours handed in their end of the year essays and I have to finish grading them by the end of the weekend so…" He turned and gave her a sheepish grin.
Thalia chuckled and hopped up onto the counter. "You're talking to the world's worst organizer here. Don't worry about it."
"I think I might beat you for that title."
"Doubt it."
They both laughed. Nico opened the cupboard above the sink, pulled out two glasses, and filled them both with water. He handed one to her and they drank in silence.
A few minutes later, Nico cleared his throat and stared into his now empty glass. "Can I ask what happened?"
He didn't look at her, but she knew what he was talking about.
"You don't have to tell me. I'm just curious."
Despite the seriousness of the question, she found herself laughing. Nico looked at her like she was insane. "I'm sorry," she said through chuckles, and shook her head. "It's just, most people don't ask. They just sort of dance around it like it's not even there."
"Bad choice of words."
She laughed again. "Sorry, I know, I know." She took a deep breath. "Even Percy and Annabeth pretend nothing's wrong. You're the first person who's asked."
"I can't tell if you're just explaining or if you're trying to avoid the question. Which is fine!" he corrected hastily. "You don't have to answer, it's okay."
"I'm not avoiding the question." She looked down at her left hand and flexed her fingers. "Our regiment got sent to a village to check for weapons. One of the houses was rigged. We went in and we saw the bombs, so we ran, but my friend…" she swallowed, "he fell. I was trying to get him out when the bombs went off. Woke up a few days later in a hospital at base with my left side bandaged and three of my fingers gone."
"What happened to the friend?"
"He didn't make it."
They were quiet.
"You're in the army."
Thalia nodded. "First Lieutenant of the Eagle company."
"My sister was in the army. "
There was no mistaking his tone of voice, or his use of the past tense.
"I'm sorry."
Nico shrugged and tried to be subtle as he wiped his eyes. "It's fine. It was a while ago. She was older than me."
"Nico." He looked up at her, and he could see that she understood. She was one of the only people who really did. "It's never fine."
He stared at her for a moment. "You're right," he said after a moment. "It's not."
They sat in silence for a while, and then Nico wiped his eyes and offered her a hand to help her down off the counter. "Come on, I'll show you the guest room."
Thalia was at a funeral.
The sky was blue, the grass was green, the sun was shining, and Thalia was at a funeral.
It was a funeral she'd been to before, quite a few times actually, and it usually ended the same way.
Someone usually died.
Usually it was her.
But she wasn't thinking about that. Instead she was thinking about how handsome Aaron looked in his suit. He was only fourteen, and already attending his first funeral. But he didn't look fourteen. He looked ageless, really. The same way his brother had.
Except not at the end. At the end Cal hadn't looked like the strong, smart boy Thalia had known. He hadn't been happy. He'd been a terrified eighteen year old boy who was afraid of dying. He'd known he wasn't going to make it out. He'd known he wasn't going home. But he'd smiled at her anyway.
He'd looked young. He'd been young. Too young.
There was nothing in the coffin. There hadn't been enough left of him to bury. But they'd given him a funeral anyway, because he deserved one.
Thalia's left side was covered in white bandages underneath her uniform, and she was in a wheelchair. She hated the chair, despised it. She'd almost insisted on standing, but she knew that she wouldn't have been able to handle standing for that long. It was too early.
She looked down at her hand. It was bandaged, too. But despite the thick white wrappings, she could still make out the deformity. The bandages were angled on the side in a way that wouldn't be possible if the hand was whole.
"It's your fault."
She looked up to see Aaron standing in front of her. The sky had gone dark, like it was about to rain, and the cemetery was suddenly empty except for the two of them, the gray headstones, and the black coffin.
"It's your fault," Aaron said again. "You should have gotten him out."
"I couldn't have," she tried to say, but her throat was closed and she couldn't make a sound.
"You should have been faster. You should have pulled him out faster."
She looked down at her lap.
"It was your fault he was there in the first place. You shouldn't have taken him into that building. You should have gone alone."
She shook her head. "No, it wasn't my fault, it wasn't, it wasn't…"
"It was!" The words reverberated around her, and she covered her head. "It was your fault! You should have saved him!"
There was a hand on her shoulder, and then she was shoved back, and a hole that hadn't been there before opened up. When she landed, she was inside a coffin, and Cal stood above her.
"Your fault," he hissed, then slammed the coffin lid.
Thalia opened her eyes, gasping for breath. The room was dark, but a streetlight outside the window illuminated enough for her to see that she wasn't in her own room. It took her a moment to remember where she was.
When she had, she sat up and wiped her face. Sweat and tears had mixed to make a sticky mess on her cheeks and under her eyes. She scrubbed it for a moment before throwing off the blankets and making her way down the short hallway to the bathroom. It was too hot, and she needed some water.
She downed a glass of water and was about to go back to bed and pretend to try to sleep when she heard a sound.
She froze, listening carefully, until it came again. A whimper. From the room across the hall.
Thalia quietly went into the other room, and listened again. The whimpering was coming from the bed. Nico had kicked off his blankets – which she understood, it was hot – and was moving uncomfortably, almost thrashing but not quite. She stood there, debating whether or not to wake him up. She'd almost decided not to when he began muttering. Most of it was in Italian, but she understood one word.
Bianca.
She didn't know who Bianca was, but Nico had lost a sister, and Bianca was an Italian name. And Thalia knew how awful it was to dream about people you'd lost.
She reached down and shook his shoulder.
It took longer than she would have liked for him to finally wake up, but finally his eyes opened and he reached over to turn on the lights.
"Sorry," she whispered, "you sounded like you were having a nightmare."
He pulled himself to sit up straight. "I was," he said quietly. "Thanks."
Thalia sat down at the end of the bed. "Do you want to tell me?"
He shook his head. "Don't worry about it."
"Well I can't see myself sleeping any time soon, you might as well tell me."
"Why can't you sleep?" He looked back up at her.
"You aren't the only ones with nightmares, Nico."
Nico lifted a hand to rub his face. "I'm sorry, yours must be worse. I probably seem stupid, huh?" He laughed at himself. "What kind of French teacher has nightmares?"
"The kind who's sister died. It's nothing to be ashamed of. Trust me, if there's anything I've learned it's that. Just don't try to pretend you don't have them."
He nodded.
Thalia suddenly realized that he wasn't wearing a shirt. It was almost fascinating to her. She'd seen a lot of men with their shirts off at base, and most of them were well muscled. She'd mostly gotten used to it, it didn't faze her anymore. But Nico's chest was smooth – no scars, no bandages, no bullet wounds. It was different.
"Go back to sleep," she said quietly. "We can talk in the morning."
Nico nodded, and lay back down on the bed. Thalia stood.
She'd made it to the door when Nico said, "Thalia?"
She turned around. "Yeah?"
"Do you want to stay?"
Thalia blinked. "What do you mean?"
"Here. Tonight. Like…in here. Not in the guest room." In the light from the street, she could see him turning red. "It's just…I don't know anyone else who gets it."
She did. Everyone in her regiment got it. Everyone in the army, she thought, although she hadn't talked to all of them.
She smiled. "Sure."
"Nat!"
The little girl looked over her shoulder, giggled, and kept toddling away.
"Damn it," Nico said under his breath, and went after her. She was unfairly fast for a two year old.
He'd nearly caught up with her when a car alarm went off in the parking lot. He glanced over his shoulder to see if it was his. When he looked back, she was gone.
Nico began to panic. "Nat!" he called again. He looked around the park to see if he could find her. Maybe she was near the bear statues?
"Looking for this?"
Nico turned to his left to see Thalia holding Nat on her hip and raising one eyebrow. She kissed Nat's forehead and set the little girl down on the grass. "You know, you shouldn't let little kids run around by themselves. What will Annabeth say?"
Nico groaned. "Oh God, please don't tell her."
"Jesus, Nico, I know you hang around teenagers all day, but do you really have to start sounding like one?"
Nico glared and came up with about seven vulgar retorts in a very short amount of time, but then Nat giggled and he decided he shouldn't use them. If Annabeth wasn't going to mount his ass on a plaque now, she would if he swore around her daughter.
Instead he stepped forward and swooped Nat up into his arms. "Natalia Isabelle Jackson, what am I going to do with you?" he asked her. She giggled.
"Nito," she said, and buried her head in his shoulder.
Thalia laughed. "And here I thought your name had a 'c' in it."
"She's two, Thalia, leave her alone."
Nat yawned and snuggled into Nico. He rubbed her back and smiled.
"She's adorable," they heard, and turned to see a woman smiling at them. "How old is she?"
"Two," Thalia replied. "Nat, can you say hi?"
Nat shook her head into Nico's shoulder.
The woman laughed. "My kids were the same way. I'm Eliza." She held out a hand to shake.
"Thalia. And this is Nico."
Nico grinned. "I'd shake your hand, but…"
Eliza shook her head. "Don't worry about it. So, Nat, is that short for Natalie?"
Nico shifted her on his hip. "Natalia. Her mother said that Natalie's not a real name, it's a diminutive of Natalia. Same with Natasha."
Eliza nodded and looked at Thalia. "My parents are from Russia, they wanted me to name my first daughter Natalia. I told them it was too Russian. I guess the diminutives never occurred to me."
Thalia blinked. "Oh!" she exclaimed after a moment. "I'm not her mother!"
Nico started and looked from Thalia to Eliza and back again before realizing what they were talking about.
"Oh, I'm sorry!" Eliza said, looking from Nico to Thalia. "I just assumed. I'm sorry."
Thalia laughed. "No, her father is my cousin. And Nico's…what are you?"
"Her father's friend."
"Right. But we're not her parents."
"Or together."
"No, not together."
Eliza nodded, but her eyes twinkled as if she were about to laugh. "I didn't say anything."
Thalia cleared her throat. "Right. Yeah."
Nat shifted in Nico's arms and he rubbed a hand down her back. From the swing set, a child started crying. Thalia lifted her left hand to point. "Is he yours?"
Eliza glanced over her shoulder, then looked back at Thalia and Nico. "No, mine are…" she trailed off when she noticed Thalia's hand. After a moment she looked up and continued. "Mine are both girls."
Thalia nodded, but the smile had melted off her face. She turned to Nico. "She looks tired. We should go. It was nice to meet you," she added, looking at Eliza.
Eliza nodded, glancing at Thalia's hand as if she thought Thalia couldn't tell. "You too."
Nico nodded, then started after Thalia, who'd already taken off towards his car.
They put Nat in her car seat, where she squirmed a bit before settling down with her eyes closed. Then Nico shut the door and turned to Thalia. "You want a ride?" he asked.
She shook her head. "No, my car's over there." She made a vague gesture over her shoulder.
"What were you doing here, anyway?"
"Jogging. I hate the idea of just lounging around Percy's apartment for so long."
"When are you shipping out?"
She smiled, but it seemed a little sad. "Two weeks from yesterday," she said, almost too quiet for him to hear.
Nico swallowed. He didn't want her to leave. In fact, the morning he'd woken up with her in his bed, he hadn't particularly wanted her to leave the apartment. But here she was telling him that she was leaving not just the country, but the continent in two weeks.
"I'll miss you."
She nodded. "I'll miss you too."
"Just…" Nico ran a hand through his hair. "Just don't get hurt, okay?"
"Why, Mr. di Angelo, if I didn't know any better, I'd say that you were worried for me."
He rolled his eyes, but still smiled. "I don't want to have to be Percy's shoulder to cry on."
Thalia laughed. "And you know he'd never go to Annabeth."
"Which is odd, seeing as how they're married."
"Exactly. He's got TGS."
Nico blinked. "What?"
"TGS. Tough Guy Syndrome. I see it all the time at base." She heaved a fake sigh. "I'm afraid it's incurable."
Nico was leaning against the car to keep himself up as he laughed.
"Don't hurt yourself," Thalia said, putting a hand on his shoulder to steady him. "It wasn't that funny."
"No, that described him perfectly," Nico gasped between peals of laughter.
Thalia grinned, began to chuckle, and a moment later they were both leaning against the car laughing hysterically.
It took the better part of five minutes for them to calm down (though neither was quite sure why). When they finally did, Nico lifted his head from the car and wiped his eyes. "I'm supposed to go drop Nat off at Percy and Annabeth's. Do you want to get coffee after that?"
Thalia smiled. "Sure."
"32, 32, Gate 32," Nico muttered to himself. He was late. Although he should have been used to that at this point. He was always late for everything important. He'd even been late to graduation.
Finally he reached a sign that pointed him towards Gate 32, just as they announced over the loudspeakers that the Eagle company third platoon was now being asked to board their plane. He cursed under his breath, and ran faster.
Thalia hadn't gotten on the plane yet when he arrived. He took her wrist, and she turned. When she saw him her face broke into a smile. "I thought you weren't coming."
"I was late, sorry."
She shook her head. "It's fine."
They stood in silence. Nico examined her face, trying to commit it to memory. Then the loudspeakers announced the last call for Eagle company third platoon.
A braver man might have kissed her, or at least told her that he liked her, but Nico was not a brave man under any circumstances, especially not with girls, so instead he hugged her tight to his chest and whispered, "I'll miss you," into her ear.
She pulled back and smiled. "I'll be back in a year."
He nodded. "I know. I'll still miss you, though."
"I'd be mad if you didn't."
"Lieutenant," a man in uniform said from a few feet away, and Thalia nodded.
"You should go," Nico said quietly.
Thalia hugged him one more time, then picked up her bag from the floor and slung it over her shoulder. "See you in a year."
Nico smiled and nodded, but his throat was too thick to talk.
Thalia turned and started up the steps. When she'd reached the top she turned and waved, and Nico waved back. Then she stepped into the plane and took a seat next to Pheobe, the Second Lieutenant of their platoon.
"He your boyfriend?" Pheobe asked, gesturing out the window at Nico, who was still standing on the tarmac.
Thalia shook her head. "Just a friend."
Pheobe hummed. "You know," she said thoughtfully, "I've had my fair share of guy friends, and I don't think I've ever been that cosy with any of them."
Thalia smiled and looked out the window. Nico hadn't moved. "You've never had him," she answered.
Nico promised himself that he would keep going like normal. He'd survived without her for long enough, he could do it for another year.
A month in, he broke down and begged Percy for her phone number. She wasn't allowed to have a phone, which no one had told him. Percy said that he would get her to Skype Nico, but Nico refused. He didn't want to seem desperate.
Two months later, three months after Thalia had left, summer ended and Nico went back to work. The second weekend after the first day of school, he asked Percy for her name on Skype. When he went back to work on Monday, his students noticed a distinct change in his attitude – he was much less crabby.
He Skyped her on Christmas, and promised that he'd have a present for her when she came back. She told him she expected one for her birthday, too. After they disconnected, he dropped his head against the desk and moaned. Then he went into the kitchen, made himself some hot chocolate, and began planning how to ask her out.
The end of February was approaching when Percy showed up on his doorstep. Tears were welling up in his best friend's eyes and threatening to spill over. Nico brought Percy in, sat him down, and got him a glass of water. When Percy had finished his water, he choked out, "Missing in Action," and Nico's heart almost stopped.
"What?" he asked, trying to keep his voice from shaking. He was jumping to conclusions, he needed to take a deep breath, it couldn't be…
"Thalia."
And this time he swore his heart really did stop.
Nico sank into a chair as Percy explained. "She was on a helicopter with one of the squads in her platoon, and the helicopter disappeared. Right off the radar. They think…" Percy took a deep shaky breath, "They think the 'copter crashed."
They don't know if they're still alive was the next sentence, without either of them having to say anything.
"But they're just MIA because…because…there weren't…"
"Bodies," Nico whispered.
Percy nodded and wiped furiously at his eyes.
Nico's father had been a mortician. He'd grown up around dead bodies. They'd never fazed him before. But the thought of Thalia's turned his stomach. He swallowed, thinking he might be sick.
"It'll be okay," he found himself telling Percy.
Percy nodded. "I know. She'll be fine. She's good at this stuff."
"She's trained."
"And she's got seven other people with her." Percy nodded again. "She'll be fine," he said, almost to himself this time.
Nico stood and pulled two bottles of juice out of the refrigerator. He suspected that he, Annabeth, and Percy's mother were the only people in the world who knew that cranberry juice made Percy feel better – they didn't know why, but it always worked.
Thalia might know, Nico thought, and had to set the bottles on the counter until the wave of nausea passed.
"You okay?" Percy asked quietly from the table.
Nico swallowed, then turned around. "Yeah," he said. He wasn't, but Thalia was actually related to Percy, so he thought Percy's comforting should come before his.
Percy didn't buy it, not for a second, but Nico didn't particularly care, and by the time Percy left at three o'clock the next morning, he seemed to be feeling a bit better.
Or maybe he was just learning to hide it.
He considered calling in sick the next day. He didn't particularly like the idea of dealing with a bunch of teenagers for the whole day after finding out that Thalia was missing. But then he thought about the alternative, which was staying at home with only his thoughts, hauled himself out of bed, got dressed, and went to work.
In his last class they were talking about parties and parades. It was one of Nico's favorite chapters to teach, especially when he could switch things around a bit and teach it near Christmas. Then he could bring in treats (which he usually did anyway) and play French Christmas and Hannukah games. But this year's class didn't understand everything they needed to understand to be able to learn this chapter before break, so there they were, at the end of February, talking about holidays that either had happened two months ago, or wouldn't happen for another four months.
"Okay, maintenant, je voudrais que vous écriviez un paragraphe sur votre fête favorite," he said in French, then, for his students' benefits, he translated. "You're going to write a paragraph about your favorite holiday. Ten to fifteen sentences. Good sentences. And if you don't finish it'll be homework."
There were groans around the room, and a few (not so quietly) whispered complaints, but Nico shot his students a look and the noise subsided until they were all working, pencils on paper. They were talking, but it wasn't disruptive, and Nico didn't have the energy to make them stop. He sat down at his desk and began grading the tests another of his classes had taken that day.
"Mr. di Angelo?"
Nico looked up. "'Monsieur', si t'il plait. C'est un classe de francais."
The boy, Matt, ignored him. "How do you say 'soldier'?"
Nico froze, clutching his pen, nails digging into his hand.
"I'm talking about the Fourth of July, with the soldiers in the parade."
He took a deep breath to answer, but one of the girls beat him to it. "It's a vocab word, stupid."
"June." Nico tried to reprimand her, but his voice was hoarse and he couldn't continue.
"You okay?" June asked.
He cleared his throat, put on a smile, and looked up. "Yes. Matt, it is a vocab word and you can find it in your notes. June, don't call people stupid. If you're going to insult someone, do it in French. At least then I can give you an effort grade."
The class laughed, June blushed, Matt went back to his work, and Nico looked down at the tests, reminding himself that he only had another half an hour left of the day.
When July 18th rolled around, he opened his eyes, saw the date, and closed them again. He should have been getting up and getting dressed to go pick Thalia up at the airport. He should have been picking up a present for her at some little convenient store, something really stupid and pathetic that she would have laughed at. He should have been getting up the courage to ask her out the way he'd been wanting to for months, since she'd left.
But she wasn't on a plane flying in to New York, and he wasn't going to pick up a present for her, and he didn't have to worry about asking her out because she wasn't coming home. And in that moment, it was hard for him to believe that she would ever come home again.
He had a summer job at an Italian restaurant a few blocks away, because teaching didn't pay during the summer. He didn't love it – it was a lot of hours on his feet and some relatively annoying customers – but he got to speak Italian with the owners, and the food was good, as was the pay, so he put up with it. But today he called and told them that he wouldn't be in. When they asked why, he made up some bullshit about not feeling well.
Which wasn't completely untrue, but wasn't the real reason.
Instead of work, he called Percy, who came over to his apartment with more alcohol than Nico had seen in a long time, and for the first time in years Nico got drunk enough to forget.
Streetlights shone through the window into Nico's office, and the streets below his apartment were busy, but the sun had gone down hours ago. The clock told him that it was past midnight. The stack of essays on his desk didn't seem to have gotten any smaller since he'd sat down five hours before.
Nico rubbed his face and stood up to get himself a glass of water. When he got to the bathroom, he looked at himself in the mirror. This school year had already taken a toll on him, even though they were only a few months in. He was exhausted, and the circles beneath his eyes were getting bigger. He should never have agreed to teach AP.
He downed the glass of water and went back to his office, where he collapsed into his chair with a groan. One of the wonderful things about living alone was that he never had to worry about disturbing people. Except the couple who lived in the apartment next door, but they were older and neither of them could hear worth a damn anyways.
The phone rang.
Nico lifted his head off the desk. The way he stared at the phone like it was some alien object he'd never seen before should have tipped him off as to how tired he really was. Finally he picked up the phone and said, "Hello?"
"Nico, I need you to go to the airport right now."
Nico closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead. "What?"
"Now! Seriously, I'll explain, but you have to go now. I can't go, Annabeth's on a business trip and Nat's sick so I can't leave but someone has to go pick her up and you're my only choice."
"Percy?"
"Yes! Didn't I say that?"
Nico chuckled. "Must have slipped your mind."
"Whatever. Are you going?"
"Airport?"
"Yeah, now, come on, go!"
"But…Percy it's midnight."
"Well if I'd known earlier I would have told you, but they just called me."
"Who?"
"The people at the airport!"
"I have essays to grade."
"Essays are more important than this?"
Nico rolled his eyes.
"Look, if you don't want to do it then you can take Nat and I'll go pick her up, but I figured you'd want to do it seeing as how you've been wanting to ask her out since she left."
"Who?"
"Oh my God, Nico, don't you listen?"
"You never told me!"
"Thalia, you idiot, they found her, she's okay."
The world seemed to stop spinning for a moment, and then all of a sudden it was spinning too fast. Nico gripped the side of the desk. He was breathing hard, and his knuckles were turning white.
"Nico? You okay?"
He swallowed hard. "I'll be there in ten minutes."
"The airport's twenty minutes from your apartment."
Nico stood up, grabbed his keys, and headed out the door. "Ten minutes," he said, before snapping his phone shut and tossing it into the passenger seat.
The drive took almost fifteen minutes, but it was still five minutes less than usual, and he pulled in to the parking lot just before one o'clock in the morning. He had work the next morning, and the essays had to be graded the day after, but he wasn't thinking about that. Instead, he was wondering what Thalia would look like after nearly a year and a half.
The airport was full of crying wives, husbands, sisters, brothers, children, and parents, as well as a handful of soldiers – the flight had only been for the people who'd been missing. In the center of it all was a girl in camo sitting on a bench. Her elbows were resting on her knees, and she was playing with her dog tags. She looked up when Nico sat down next to her.
They didn't say anything, just looked at each other, until she put her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder. Nico tried to hide just how moist his eyes were by putting his own face in her shoulder. "I'm sorry," she said, her voice muffled by his t-shirt.
He shook his head even though she couldn't see. "It's not your fault."
"It was," she insisted. "I was supposed to be in charge, I should have seen…"
"Thalia," he interrupted. He pulled back and took her face in his hands. Her cheeks were wet. "It doesn't matter anymore. You're home now."
"Sarah died." Thalia hand tightened around her dog tags. "I was supposed to protect her and she died. I promised."
"It's okay, Thalia."
"It's not!" Her voice attracted the attention of a few people standing by, and some of the other soldiers around them looked sympathetic, but Nico didn't notice. "It's just like Cal all over again. I should have saved her."
"But you saved the rest of us."
Nico looked up to see a man about his own age standing behind Thalia. The man looked a bit uncomfortable, and as tired as Thalia did. Behind him was a woman who Nico supposed was his mother. "Sarah didn't blame you, Lieutenant. She was just…" he trailed off and cleared his throat, as if he didn't know what else to say.
Another man stepped forward. "She was doing her duty, ma'am. And you were doing yours."
"Mine was to keep all of you safe," Thalia whispered.
The second man shook his head. "Yours was to keep as many of us safe as possible. You couldn't have kept Sarah safe if you'd tried. And you would have gotten killed yourself if you had tried."
The first man turned around. "Hey!" he shouted, and the airport gradually went quiet. He might not have been good with words, but he made up for it in volume. "Who save our asses?" he asked the surrounding soldiers.
There were a few murmurs, and then a man from the back answered, "Lieutenant Grace!"
The airport exploded into cheers from the six remaining men. It grew louder as the families joined in, and then the other people in the airport, most of whom had no idea what was going on but were celebrating anyway.
Nico grinned. He reached across her body and took her left hand in his right, fingers curling around where her fingers should have been and intertwining with the remaining ones. His other hand cupped the back of her neck.
When he kissed her, stars exploded behind his eyes.
This is my birthday present to you, which I realize is a little backwards, seeing as how it's my birthday. But oh well. It's my birthday! I'll be sixteen at 10:37 tonight. It's weird, I remember uploading The Highwayman last year on my birthday. And since then I've finished The Sadness of Mistakes, and written three new chapter stories, as well as a bunch of one-shots. Funny how time flies. For my birthday I went out to lunch with my mom and sister (who's sitting next to me, she says hi), and then we went to get our nails done. Tonight we're going to see a movie. And next week I'm getting my cartilage pierced. In my ear, nowhere else. I'm okay with piercings in ears and bellybuttons, but I have yet to see someone who can pull any other piercing off. Tiny nose studs are sometimes okay.
On another note, happy anniversary to Billie Joe and Adrienne Armstrong! Billie Joe Armstrong is the lead singer of Green Day, and he married Adrienne Nesser in 1994. So this is their 20th wedding anniversary. You have no idea how excited I was when I found out they got married on my birthday.
Thank you to everyone who read the first chapter of Black and Gray. I'm sorry I haven't updated it yet, I've been really focused on this story and my Fourth of July story for my holiday series. As soon as I finish the Fourth of July story I'll finish the second chapter and upload it. Spaceling (my sister, the one who said hi) is definitely on my case about it, so don't worry, it'll get done.
Remember to check back on Saturday for the Fourth of July story! The series officially has a name: it's called Celebrations with Gummy Bears. Most of the stories have featured gummy bears, so I thought it was a fitting title. I know Friday is the fourth, but the library isn't open on Fridays, and as anyone who's been with me for a while knows, I can't upload at home or my mom will find out about my account. So it'll be up on the fifth.
Oh, and I would like everyone to know that I got a sonic screwdriver for my birthday (thanks again, Spaceling!). If you don't know what a sonic screwdriver is, then you are deprived. Go watch Doctor Who. It's the Tenth Doctor's screwdriver, and it has a pen attachment! I probably looked like a complete idiot in the restaurant, pointing a weird light up thing that whirs at my mother. Again, if you don't watch Doctor Who, you should. I was introduced a few months ago by my friends, and now I'm pretty much addicted. I haven't watched the classic seasons yet, or Torchwood, but I intend to watch both.
Review and come back on Saturday for the Fourth of July installment of Celebrations with Gummy Bears!