Bear in mind that I wrote this because I couldn't sleep. But I'm still excited about it because I've wanted to do a Hannibal/Addams Family crossover for so long!

"Gomez, we have received a dinner invitation," Morticia announced.

"By whom?"

"By Doctor Hannibal Lecter."

Gomez appeared thoughtful and cautious. "Doctor you say?"

"Yes. Hannibal Lecter is an accomplished psychiatrist."

"Why would he invite us to dinner?"

Morticia shrugged, a movement so graceful when it was done by her. "I don't know," she replied frankly. "But I hear that the man is very social and has many acquaintances. Maybe he wants to expand his circle. Maybe he wants to advertise himself. Whatever the reason, darling, I think that it would be terribly rude to decline his offer."

Gomez paused to ponder this for a little while. In the end, he nodded. "Yes, you're right, as always," he said with a smile gracing his face. "We shall go."

Hannibal Lecter's residence was impressive. Morticia could not wait to get inside and admire the décor. She hoped that the doctor did not favour pastels.

"I'm glad that we have agreed to come, mon cher," she breathed.

A soft groan escaped Gomez's lips. "Oh Tish," he sighed, "that's French. You know what that does to me."

A smile made its presence known on her beautiful, pale face. She knew exactly what it did to him. It was her favourite way to torment Gomez; no instrument of torture could surpass French - and they did possess quite a few instruments that created pain and pleasure.

"Oui," she said simply.

Gomez held her delicate hand and started planting kisses from her long fingers all the way up to her shoulder. Morticia let out a barely audible sigh of pleasure before gently pushing her husband away.

"Not now, Gomez," she teased.

She rang the bell before her adoring husband could utter a word.

The man that opened the door was an impressive figure. He was tall, with light brown hair and eyes that looked almost maroon. His cheekbones were high and sharp as Morticia's, his lips were sensual, and his jaw was prominent. He was wearing a dark red three-piece suit with a beige floral tie and a white shirt. He looked so sophisticated.

"Mr. and Mrs. Addams," he greeted them with a warm smile. "Welcome. Please, come in."

He stepped aside to let them cross the threshold and closed the door behind them. The couple was looking around, pleased to see dark colours on the walls and furniture.

"We would like to thank you for your invitation," Morticia said and smiled as their host politely took their coats.

"Thank you for accepting it," Hannibal said in return.

He led them in the dining room and moved to the kitchen in order to add the last strokes to the paintings that his plates were.

The dining room was in dark colours as well, blue and red and black prevailing. The dining table was long and decorated with flowers and horns. Such a bizarre and artistic combination.

"It's a truly lovely place, isn't it, my dear?" Gomez asked.

"Indeed it is."

Hannibal Lecter, ever the gracious host, did not let his guests wait long. He soon appeared in the dining room, carrying the dishes. Tonight he was serving pork loin with Cumberland sauce. Well, his guests would think that it was pork. And that was not exactly a lie: the man that they were going to eat had been a pig.

Ever the true gentleman, he first placed a dish before Morticia, whose eyes focused on the sauce first for some reason. It looked so much like blood, like the pork was still bleeding.

When the dishes were settled and the wine was poured, Hannibal took a seat at the head of the table and placed a napkin on his lap. He held his glass and raised it in toast. "Welcome to my home." He was pleased to see that, just like himself, the Addamses sniffed the wine and then took a sip, rolling the drink around in their mouths, exposing it to all of their taste buds, before swallowing it.

"Doctor Lecter, may I ask you a question?"

"Of course, Mr. Addams."

"How do you know us?"

Hannibal gave him a cryptic smile that meant everything but gave away nothing. "I believe that you will soon realise that, in our own unique ways, we are alike," he said. He let the mystical phrase hover in the air before adding in a more cheerful manner, "I hope that you will enjoy the food."

"Well," said Morticia with a smile on her face, "it's not like Mama's cat dish, but I don't think it will be all that bad."

Hannibal chuckled and began to cut through the tender human meat. Morticia Addams could add humour to all her other virtues. She was beautiful - stunning one could say - , graceful and polite, sophisticated, intelligent - he could see it in her eyes. Her husband was good-looking, a passionate man, a sportsman.

Time went by with the three of them making idle talk. The guests praised the host's cooking skills, the host complimented the guests. It turned out that Morticia had read a few of Hannibal's essays and had been fascinated, and Gomez was a great opponent for a debate.

After desert had filled their bellies and the dishes had been cleared from the table, Hannibal decided to lead their discussion to the real reason of his invitation. "Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc," he said.

The couple looked at each other a little puzzled. "You know the Addams family motto, doctor?" Gomez asked.

"We gladly feast on those who would subdue us," Hannibal translated. "Yes, I know your motto. It is what drew me to you. You see, I have a little motto of my own: Whenever feasible, one should always try to eat the rude."

The couple looked at each other again. This time, however, the doctor noticed that they were intrigued. He had not revealed this phrase, his life philosophy, to anyone just yet (he would do so with Will, when the younger man was ready) but he was not afraid of letting the Addamses in on his little secret. He knew that they would not turn him in to the police. He had received his confirmation when he saw their eyes: they were interested, not scared or repulsed. If anything, he had risen to a whole new level in their eyes.

"You see," Hannibal carried on, "apart from our mottos, we have other things that bind us together. At the beginning of this lovely dinner, I said that we are alike. We are intelligent and charming and courteous, we like art and the macabre, we don't like people telling us to do, society does not accept us for what we are, and we don't take betrayal lightly."

"You forgot to add great style to all that," Gomez said with a broad smile.

"Indeed," Hannibal agreed with the ghost of a smile on his face. "I apologise." Another thing that he did not add to what they had in common was the strong will to protect and avenge their families. Allowing them to see who he really was - that was not difficult. But he could not tell them about Mischa. This was a dear secret that he would hold on to.

"So," Morticia's melodious voice chased the thoughts of his sister away, "I suppose that we did not truly feast on pork tonight." Her smile was as soft and discreet as Hannibal's. Both of them were minimalistic in their movements; he liked that.

"Not per se. But the man was a pig."

The Addamses chuckled. Both of them really liked the doctor, more so now that they were aware of his eating habits. This could actually be the beginning of a great friendship.

As the two guests put on their coats, Hannibal said, "We should do this again. I would love to meet the rest of the family." He was already planning the feast in his mind. It would be so delightful. The table would be covered with dishes for everyone. He would turn his food to art in such a way that they would find it almost rude to destroy his creations by eating them.

"Of course, doctor," Morticia agreed and took her husband's arm. She could already imagine how excited everyone, especially Wednesday, would be to meet the cannibalistic psychiatrist. Oh yes, Wednesday most of all.

I know that the Latin phrase does not mean what it's supposed to mean (Hollywood Latin attack again), but I used it because they use it in the first AF film.

Reviews are love :)