I found this little gem in my fanfiction folder. I thought I would share this with you guys. I wrote this while listening to Monster by Skillet. I hope you guys like this and please review! I won't update unless someone actually enjoys this enough to read it.
Giles had no idea what to do about Buffy. A few months ago, she had made a grave miscalculation in error and everything had gone downhill from there. However, he was neither her Watcher nor her father. Sometimes he wondered if he was even her friend. It was not his place to reason with her. He hung his head and sighed, but he could not let her suffer and make bad decisions. He once thought that he had taught her everything he knew, but he was beginning to find that teaching the Slayer never ended. To be honest, he did not want it to end.
Just being around Buffy was as if the sun was shining just for him. She was bubbly and strong. Powerful in a way that he had never seen before. Some of it was the Slayer in her. Most of it was Buffy's spirit. However, every time he had seen her lately that spark had been missing. At first, he had attributed it to that Parker fellow not returning her feelings. Then, after the beer incident he had found out that Parker had "used and abused" his Buffy.
He really should not have done that.
Nor should he have cursed the boy. Really, it had been petty but highly satisfying. Although, a few seconds later Ethan had called sarcastically welcoming him back into the fold. He had instantly cancelled his spell and glowered at the phone. How he hated that man.
Now, she had seemingly moved on. He was hearing whispers of a new beau, one Riley Finn. It was enough to make him go mad. Buffy used to tell him things. They used to be close, but ever since his little lesion with Olivia, Buffy had been slowly eradicating him from her life. He wished he could take those hurtful words back or at least explain to Buffy why he had said them, but explaining to Buffy would show her his true feelings. Which were a complicated subject; a really, really complicated subject.
He had denied it for so long, but Willow's little "will it so" spell had opened his eyes and he faintly wondered why Spike got to be the one to snog Buffy half the night. Giles had almost believed he was going to lose his mind from disgust and anger before the end of that night. When Buffy had asked him to walk her down the aisle he had been touched, and a little disgusted although he could not figure out why. Then Spike had made that crack about him "being like his father." He really wanted to hit him after that. It took a few days of introspection for him to be able to admit all of those feelings he had repressed. Now, he wanted to trash his apartment in frustration.
He was in love with Buffy, and he abhorred himself.
It frustrated him that she could make him feel like a sick, perverted old man. He hated how he doted on her, and made excuse after excuse for her. He loathed that she had this unknown power to send him spiraling into a depression. He had only felt like this once before, and then he had turned to Ethan and his magic. To be honest he was actually thinking of calling the prat and inviting him over for a quick spell; one that would cause Riley's balls to fall off.
To be fair he was not mad at Riley. He could not help that he had fallen for Buffy's charms. It was more that he was angry at Buffy for thinking that Iowa idiot could offer her more than himself. He was a powerful warlock. If truth were told, he could easily kill vampires. Just one twitch of his fingers and they would burst into flame. He did not though. He could not. Down that road led to what Willow called "badness".
The everyday spells that he taught Willow and performed in accordance of his duties were fine. They never bothered him. it was the wild magic caused him to miss the days he was respected.
And feared.
It scared him how much he missed it sometimes. Not the orgies or Eygon. Not even the comradely he shared with his group of friends. It was the magic that he had called idly. The magic that allowed him to change his appearance, read whole books at a single glance, and see into men's minds. It had been so hard to control his urge to use magic in those early days. By the time he had come to Sunnydale he had learned control by repression. Then when that tactic stopped working, he visualized the disappointment he would experience from Buffy and the others. He had only been tempted to use it once, but Angelus was no ordinary vampire and he had known for some time the power that Giles suppressed. Special chains had been made to keep his magic in check, and by the time Xander and Buffy found him, he had been too weak to use his magic. Sometimes, he was grateful that he could not have used his powers. He knew that something dreadful would have happened.
Now he just wanted to immerse himself in the magic that was so much a part of him, and that was Buffy's fault. Well….partly her fault at any rate, she probably would not notice if someone started using magic to decrease the demon population. Buffy was that caught up in her college boy.
Glaring at the teapot he felt a surge of anger and suddenly the tea kittle slammed into the opposite wall. Giles gritted his teeth and began to; metaphorically, bore a whole in the floor with his anger. He should not have done that. Giles became even more angry, but not at himself this time. He was angry at Buffy.
Snarling, he began cleaning up the mess and hissing when the hot water connected with his skin. Cursing he stood up and snapped his fingers. The water zipped back into the tea kittle and it landed lightly on the stove. He smirked; he still had it.
The phone rang and he wondered who it could be. Ethan would not be able to detect the use of his wild magic, as it was an innate sort of magic.
"Hello," Giles' voice was tired and he tried to sound pleasant. He failed.
"Giles?" Willow sounded worried for a moment, "You okay?"
"I'm fine," Giles replied with a sigh, "Just ready for bed I guess."
Willow seemed to accept that which caused Giles to feel a spurt of anger. The walls began to rattle and Giles had to count to five before the walls stopped shaking.
"Watcher what was that?" Spike hollered, he sounded freaked out. Giles ignored him.
"Tara and I were calling the corners," Willow began with a frown in her voice, "when Tara felt an unusually strong magical presence. I thought I should call you."
"Why?" Giles asked, and he had a sinking feeling that Tara had detected his own wild magic.
"She said it was angry and depressed," Willow replied worry clouding her voice. "Tara can read auras, both magical and mundane. She knows what she's talking about."
"I'm sure she does," Giles replied trying to hold off the witch-hunt, "But maybe we should wait until she feels it again. It might be someone who is not in a good place now. We should leave it for a few days. If there are still occurrences then we should worry.
"Giles I don't think so," Willow contradicted, "She's already felt it twice in the span of two minutes."
Giles' breathing became labored. He felt, now more than ever, useless. They were not even listening to him anymore. The walls began to rattle again and Spike hollered. Finally losing his cool, Giles snapped his fingers and Spike's screaming came to a strangled halt. He wondered how long he could keep the wanker's mouth sealed without feeling guilty.
"Giles," Willow sounded panicked, "She just felt it again. This time she said the magic was used on a person."
Giles sneered mentally at Spike being counted as a person. Finally, Giles muttered, "We'll look into it tomorrow." He quickly hung up.
Glancing at the bathroom door Giles threw down his towel and shook his head. He was tired. More magic had passed through his fingers tonight then it had in years. Besides, with Spike finally quiet he would be able to get some sleep.
Willow and Tara knocked franticly. They had not slept a wink the night before. Both were afraid of the implications of what they knew. Was it some dark warlock out to end humankind? Was it an evil demon ready to kill Buffy? Was Ethan Rain back?
The door opened and Giles stood in the doorway. He looked different somehow, more alive than Willow could ever remember seeing him. She suddenly felt uneasy.
"Hello Willow," Giles' voice and tone was cordial but there was an underlying danger about him that set Willow's teeth on edge, "Nice to see you again Tara."
Tara's eyes were wide and she shrank back from Giles. Willow looked at Tara and saw the shocked look on her face. The same one she had been wearing the night before.
"Come in girls," Giles went on seemingly oblivious to Tara's terror, "I've just made breakfast. Spike is rather quiet today so he shouldn't bother us."
Willow nodded mechanically and drug Tara into the house. They both knew that they could possibly be in a desperate situation, but she knew that Giles would not hurt them, if this really was Giles at any rate.
The door snapped shut and Giles leaned up against it. Tara stuttered out, "Y…You d…didn't invite us in for b…breakfast did you?"
"No," His voice became hard and his gaze was no longer friendly.
"What did you do to Spike?" Willow whimpered and Giles rolled his eyes.
"I didn't kill the vampire. I just shut the wanker up. God only knows why Buffy wants him alive. Probably only does it to annoy me."
"Giles…what's wrong?" Willow asked worried.
"I am sick of being undervalued," Giles snarled his anger flaring to the surface. He was having a hard time holding it back. It was like a splinter; the more the anger festered the worse it hurt, "I'm sick of you four patronizing the old man. I am not half as old as you lot think and I'm twice as powerful. Don't test me!"
Willow and Tara took a step back. Tara could feel his power oozing from him and she felt terrified and calm all at once. It was as if his essence were both sides of the same coin: destruction and creation. She felt awed by his power.
"Now," Giles began looking between the two, "Why hasn't Buffy called to tell me she has been patrolling. Or has she been too busy with her college boy to actually heed her calling?"
"Buffy didn't tell you?" Willow whispered and Tara sucked in a breath. This was going to be bad.
"Tell me what?" Giles snarled the air was thick was tension and the crackle of his magic.
"Buffy is a part of the initiative," Willow whispered closing her eyes so she did not have to see Giles' face. She was trembling in fear and sadness. Why didn't Buffy tell him?
"What?" Giles' voice was a deathly whisper and Willow felt herself shake.
"Riley is part of the initiative…" Willow never got the chance to finish. There was a loud crack and Giles was gone. Willow grabbed Tara's hand seeking comfort. Then they quickly left Giles' apartment and headed for the college. They knew exactly where he was going.
Thank you for reading!