I'd like to state that before anyone reads this, it's supposed to be cheesy. It's supposed to be bad. I have no actual knowledge of any of these k-pop idols - this is a birthday present for someone. Please don't sue me/decapitate me for the portrayal of these men.
It was a swelteringly hot day when Rochelle braved the heat to make the perilous trek to her mailbox, her heart beating nearly out of her chest as she opened the boiling metal door to snatch up a letter inside.
It had been exactly one month ago when she'd entered the contest - after finding out from a reputable news source that her favorite Korean band, SHINee, was holding a contest that stated any girl who won would be awarded a date with each of its alluring members, the American girl couldn't help but scribble her entry on a spare contest card and mail it in as soon as possible. And finally, thirty days later, the teen had gotten her reply.
Sweat pouring down her face in rivers, the girl ripped open the letter. Her heart hammered in her chest. Her lip quivered in excitement. Her stomach growled in protest, for it was lunchtime and she'd been too busy reading k-pop articles to eat anything before she heard the mail truck. Slowly, with shaking fingers, she lifted the page out of its slim imprisonment, and read the result, nearly pissing herself in jubilation at the words on the page that she could somehow read even though she didn't know Korean.
"I WON!"
And, one week later, she boarded the plane that would take her to her beloved dates.
Even after the 15 hour flight, Rochelle was filled with elation. Setting foot in a Seoul airport was just the beginning of her adventure - and she from the baggage area, she could see the men who would be her entertainment for the duration of her stay.
They stood in a line holding a banner with her name on it, looking like angels sent straight from God; Rochelle had never felt particularly religious before, but she found herself thanking every deity in existence for the way the band members looked - from their silky looking hair to their bootylicious, body hugging pants, they looked perfect. Feeling more and more nervous by the minute, Rochelle walked towards them.
Onew was the first to step forward, beaming down at her - he looked like a giant compared to her slender, short frame. "여보세요!" He exclaimed, reaching out for a hug. "It is so nice to meet you!" He said, sounding genuinely excited through his thick accent. Rochelle's cheeks went red as the man bent down to embrace her, feeling her heart skip a beat as his long, muscular arms wrapped around her.
"H-Hi," she mumbled, feeling as if she was about melt into the polished airport floor beneath them. With a shaky, nervous laugh, she reached up and patted the boy's back, feeling his tense muscles through his thin, silky shirt through some form of heightened sense of touch that only fanfiction will allow.
"So!" Onew grinned, pulling away and gesturing towards the rest of the band. "Who would you like to go out with first?" He asked, falling back in line with the four other Korean angels standing before her. Rochelle's eyes briefly wandered over to Taemin, struggling not to drool at the sight of her favorite member, before clearing her mind with a shake of her head. No, she decided inwardly. Better save the best for last.
"I think I'd like to start with..." Rochelle's eyes landed on her least favorite of the group. "Key!"
Key stepped forward, and off they went.
This... was not my idea of a date...
Rochelle and the seemingly silent Key were wandering around a local mall, somehow not being bombarded by fans and paparazzi despite the fact that she was with a multimillionaire popstar. Key hadn't really said more than two sentences to her - "nice to meet you," and "where would you like to go?" before directing their driver to a local mall. He seemed a lot more gruff than Rochelle had previously imagined - even a bit awkward, as evidenced by his silence and apparent aversion to meeting her eyes.
"So..." Rochelle began uneasily, rocking back and forth on her heels. "Um, d'you want to get some food, or-" a blinding flash of white and a click stopped her question in its tracks, causing her to try to rub the whiteness out of her eyes. "Wha-?"
Oh.
There was the paparazzi and rabid fangirls.
Key grabbed Rochelle's hand and yanked her away from the advancing crowd, pulling her along as he fled the scene. As they ran, Rochelle privately wondered where in the hell Key's bodyguards were during this entire event.
A wave of gloom washed over Rochelle as she was promptly stuffed in a car and driven back to SM headquarters. Resting her head on her palm and staring moodily through the window, a quiet sigh could be heard throughout the limo.
First date - failure.
"Ah, so you didn't get to do much with Key," Onew said sympathetically as he and Rochelle settled down with some gelato at a nearby icecream shop, now surrounded with the bodyguards that had been missing during Key's excursion. "He seems to think he doesn't need guards - you'll have to excuse him," he said politely.
Rochelle shook her head. "Oh, it's fine. Things happen. Besides, I've got the rest of the day to make up for it!" She added optimistically.
Onew swallowed a large spoonful of gelato and grinned, showing a large set of chocolate-covered teeth. "That's the spirit!" He exclaimed. Rochelle, who had been swallowing some of her own gelato at the time, snorted loudly with laughter...
...sending globs of mucus and half-melted gelato through her nose, straight onto Onew.
Even as the boy cracked up laughing, grabbing some nearby napkins to start the damage control, Rochelle's cheeks reddened and she felt her mood worsen. The pair stood up soon after that, getting ushered into another cab, taken back to the studio for a change of clothes and another boy to spend time with.
Second date - failure.
"We could go to a movie, if you want! Oh, but they're all in Korean. You don't know Korean, do you? I didn't think so. Sorry. Maybe we could go get f- oh, but you just had food with Onew. Maybe we could..." Minho's incessant rambling echoed in the stairwell as he and Rochelle made their way down to the first floor of SM's Studio.
"I know!" Minho cried, taking her hand and pulling her through the stairwell's door. "Why don't I take you on a tour of the studio?"
Rochelle nodded, not feeling very chatty after her last two failures. Nothing can go wrong with this, she thought desperately. It's a tour. No food, no paparazzi, everything should be totally fine.
Oh, how wrong she was.
It was as if she had drank from the fountain of Wrongness. As if her patron saint was Saint Incorrectus. As if God had looked upon her at birth and said, "Ah, yes. This one will have a dash of beauty, a teaspoon of smarts - and fifteen cups of inaccuracy." It was as if she was cursed, forever blind to the truth, having bad luck in her most exciting days.
The tour had started very nicely - with Minho's knowledge of the studio paired with the lovely architecture, Rochelle had begun to feel better about her day. Everything seemed to be going so well.
Until they found the fountain.
"It's one of those wishing fountains!" Minho offered helpfully, handing her a coin to toss. "You just stand with your back to the fountain, and flip it over your shoulder! It's for good luck." The pair stood shoulder to shoulder, backs to the fountain, and Rochelle tensed, preparing the best coin toss of her entire life. Maybe, if she could do this, luck would be on her side today.
Luck was not on her side today.
As Rochelle flung the coin with all her might, her body jolting backwards with the force of the throw, her right heel suddenly popped off - sending her flailing backwards into the water, smacking her temple against the stone foundation and soaking her to the bone.
Minho tried to hide his laughter as he helped her back out of the fountain, producing a handkerchief to press to her bleeding temple.
As she stumbled along, heel-less and freezing, Rochelle wanted to melt away in embarrassment. Back for another outfit change it was.
Third date - failure.
As she sat silently alongside Jonghyun in the movie theater, staring less-than-enthusiastically at the random romance that was playing before her in a language she couldn't understand, Rochelle wondered what the hell was wrong with her.
I get to meet my favorite band in the whole world, she though grouchily, and I don't even get a full date with one, I send flying snot-gelato all over the second, and plummet to my potential death in a fountain with the third. Why does God hate me? she grumbled inwardly.
Resting her head against the theater seat, Rochelle grumbled her way into a nap.
Fourth date... failure?
Rochelle walked silently alongside Taemin as the pair wandered their way through a beautiful garden, gazing in awe at the ethereal flowers spread around the maze of plants. Now this, she sighed inwardly. This is alright.
Stealing a quick glance at Taemin, she found him looking at her with concern. Rochelle quickly averted her eyes, not wanting to seem like an obsessed fangirl. Lost in thought, she continued her way through the garden.
"Is... something wrong?" A quiet voice asked beside her.
Rochelle glanced at the boy, her favorite band member, quickly thinking back over her day.
And, just as quickly, bursting into tears.
"I'm sorry," she mumbled, keeping her head down so she wouldn't have to look at her idol's startled expression. "It's just, all day I've had such bad luck, I've practically ruined every date I've been on... everything's been going wrong. This was supposed to be one of the happiest days of my life, but it's just been ruined by my own luck." She admitted, wrapping her arms around herself and turning away.
She felt another pair of muscular arms wrapping themselves around her torso.
"Ah, forgive me, but..." Taemin started off, shyly. "I don't necessarily think that's true. There's still time for it to be a good day!" He added, pulling away and putting a hand behind his neck, running his hand through his hair nervously.
"No, there's not," Rochelle sounded gloomy.
"I- uh, I think there is." Handing the girl a handkerchief and taking her hand, Taemin led her through the rows of flowers, dodging vines and bushes before pulling her to a stop in front of a big stage that (through the magical powers of fanfiction) wasn't visible to her before. Taemin let go of Rochelle's hand, hopped up on the stage, and produced a microphone from seemingly out of nowhere.
Rochelle found herself wondering where he had hidden that microphone, considering his skintight wardrobe.
"We realized it's been a bad day," Taemin began shyly, looking to his left and right as his band members emerged beside him from the sides of the stage. "So, we figured... it's our contest, right? We should be making you happy!"
"So..." The boys' voices echoed off each other as music began to play loudly, each band member running to their places onstage and assuming their dance positions. "Here's a concert, just for you!"
And with that, Rochelle found herself finally happy as she danced and sang along. And so ended the cheesiest birthday fanfiction known to man.
(Please don't remember me for this, world.)