DANGER MOUSE
Nothing Iffy About My Steps
WRITTEN BY ZARIUS
(Contains spoilers for "The World Is Full Of Stuff")
As Professor Squawkencluck proudly presented her futuroid camera to the Danger Agents and Colonel K, her mind turned to what it could well mean for the future.
Villains could be stopped in their tracks before they could even concoct a scheme to disrupt society in the first place, the idea of preventing whole timelines where their plans would not come to fruition was tantalising.
It wasn't long before Danger Mouse, ever a thorn in her sides, took the camera off of her hands and proceeded to put it through its paces, and of course he opted to take photos of his friends rather than logically use it on a baddie they had in custody to determine their future guilt.
He took a photo of Colonel K, making sure to get his best side, he took a photo of Penfold, and finally, he offered to take a selfie with Squawk.
She wasn't quite sure how to take having a photo taken of her specifically, and it gave her pause for thought.
It was odd how she could be so confidant in her work, only to start questioning it when it began to personally affect her.
Perhaps this was in some way her means of respecting the hardware. In many an instance, her inventions tended to surpass even her own expectations, proving her genius was perhaps too advanced even for her own comprehension. A corner of her soul feared the realisation that there was maybe a tiny little bit of god-like power inside of her, and she was too humble to embrace it in any other means but subconsciously.
"Squawk, selfie?" DM asked as he approached her, putting his arm tightly around her shoulder and neck, pulling her in closer.
Squawk felt a slight flutter in her knotted stomach
"I'm not sure..." she said with hesitation, trying to express what she was thinking to DM, only it was too late, Danger Mouse pressed the button on the camera and being bathed in a quick flash of white light as the futuroid photo was taken.
Everyone in the room examined the photos as they came out, and it became all too apparent there was something amiss.
The Colonel was pictured next to what appeared to Baron Greenback, prompting a swift and irritated rant from her boss about consuming his own hat.
The next photo was for Penfold, and as always was the case with him; his predicaments were always capable of making her laugh. It was him dressed in a pink tutu; Penfold didn't so much mind that as he minded the colour of the garb he was wearing. His preference was always purple.
Danger Mouse gazed upon the final photo and his face twisted into a strange mix of horror, shock, and one might even say emotional longing tinged with a hint of regret and sadness.
It was perhaps all too fitting that it was this point; Squawk had elected to get tremendously excited for the results of her own invention being used on her. She was anxious to see how kind the universe would be to her in the future.
"Come on, let's see it" she teased.
Danger Mouse tried shifting the goalposts rather than give her what she wanted.
"That's enough photos, you were saying Colonel?" he asked of his superior, who was trying to explain the mission at hand to the agents.
Squawk would not take 'no' for an answer and took the photo from him.
She gazed at it and her glasses almost fell off as her eyebrows rose up and her eyes widened.
All she could think about was how much cruel variety the universe could inflict on its inhabitants.
For the Colonel, siding with a dangerous enemy.
For Penfold, humiliation from his peers
For her, something much simpler and, on the surface, sweeter and kinder, but nevertheless a sign she had perhaps not been too careless with the steps she took in life to avoid such fine pleasures for fear it would compromise her position and working relations.
Already she could feel herself tense up, and she began second guessing herself.
She should have removed DM from her person and stuck to the professional guidelines of the workplace, where there was a zero tolerance policy on inappropriate groping. As soon as it happened, she should have put a stop to it, no matter how brief it was.
She had been unsure of what her device would do to her, but knowing Danger Mouse was trying it out should have made it her doubly uncertain.
There appeared to be nothing iffy about the steps she'd taken all through her professional relationship with Danger Mouse. She had always made it clear her principle emotion with him was that of a tolerable friendship at best and unparalleled frustration at worst.
She had tried to make her concerns clear about the potential ramifications of her invention and his inappropriateness just seconds before the photo was taken, he didn't listen. He never listened.
And now the future was seemingly laid out before her, with her and Danger Mouse exchanging pleasantries on the lips, there was something about the expressions, there was no doubt attached to them, no fear, just drive and purpose.
How did this happen? When will it happen? What steps had she not taken to ensure she couldn't face this future?
More to the point, she thought, why did she have to feel like this was a problem to begin with?