So I explained everything to everyone over on ao3 so lemme go ahead and explain it to y'all over here on as well. So I'm a huge fan of a Killunary fic over on ao3 called Always x and x Forever (my fellow Canary/Killunary stans need to go check it out btw!) and over the summer started coming up with fic ideas based on it and Symone_Nicole, the writer of the story, was kind enough to give me permission to go through with publishing any and all of my fics based on her story. This fic here is the first one I ever wrote and published on ao3.
Note: The following fic is based on the ao3 story Always x and x Forever by Symone_Nicole. Should you feel confused by any references made in the fic, please give Always x and x Forever a read for clarification purposes.:)
"Killua…don't."
Killua froze, lips mere centimeters away from the lips of the beautiful woman that had stolen his heart. He suddenly felt foolish for closing his eyes so quickly as he leaned in for what he thought would be his first kiss. Had he misread the signals? Heh…were there ever any signals to begin with? Perhaps his heart had made him see what he wanted to see.
Killua finally opened his eyes, cerulean clashing with gray. It was a challenge to keep his line of vision trained on her eyes and not the pair of luscious lips he so desperately wanted to taste. God, she was so beautiful…
Canary had never felt her heart beat this fast before. The organ always sped up when in the presence of the handsome hunter but it had been sent into overdrive the moment Killua's eyes were overcome with tenderness and he promptly leaned in. Canary wished the damn thing would calm down but that wouldn't happen what with Killua invading her personal space. Those eyes of his certainly weren't helping either. She could see the hurt shining in them, her reluctant rejection being the cause for some of it.
It's not like Canary didn't want to kiss Killua. Hell, her dreams for months now consisted of kissing him among other things. She had nearly let his lips press against hers when she caught herself.
Killua's lips parted slightly in surprise at the brown hands suddenly cupping his face.
Canary gave Killua a sad, gentle smile. "Killua, you're hurting. Now just isn't the right time."
Killua stared wordlessly at Canary for a moment before bringing his hands up to take her hands away from his face. Instead of letting her hands go, however, he held onto them, giving them a gentle squeeze before suddenly leaning forward to press his forehead against her own.
It seemed Killua really liked testing the speed of her heart because Canary was sure it was about to leap out of her chest. Well, at least he had his eyes averted downwards. She never would've imagined they'd end up this physically close. Kikyo's silent warning to not get to close to Killua still rang fresh in her mind. Out of the two that had been hurt that day, Canary was more than sure she had been hurt the most. When she first realized her feelings for him, she'd accepted with a smile that it'd always be one-sided. But then Kai, the best thing that had ever happened to her, happened and Killua reentered her life out of nowhere and they finally became friends. Though her dreams and heart told another story, Canary had been content with their friendship with the only drawback being the nagging hope that he felt the same way at the back of her head.
And now here they were, both a little older sitting on the bed of the guest room that Canary had long since dubbed "Killua's Room". As much as Killua desperately tried hiding the turmoil he felt from Alluka's death, Canary saw through him every time. She had pledged to wait until he was ready to talk about it that day in the training room. She had gone months not confronting him about the matter but maybe it was time to gently coax it out of him. The nightmare Canary had walked in on him having must've been an excruciatingly bad one because Canary had never seen Killua cry before. It had taken a long, comforting hug and nurturing shushes to get him to calm down.
"It's all my fault," Canary remembered him choking out as he tightly fisted the back of her shirt.
"You did all you could, Killua," Canary had said as she gently rubbed his back.
Canary was brought back into the present by her arms unexpectedly being gripped. Killua's forehead was no longer pressed against her own, now lodged in her chest. Canary could feel her heart twist as she noticed the tears trailing down the white haired man's cheeks. His trembling is what made Canary wrap her arms around his neck and pull him closer, resting her cheek atop his head.
"It hurts, Canary," Killua sobbed. "Make it stop."
A few tears escaped Canary's eyes. She kissed the top of his head. "I'm here for you, Killua."