Stan flipped the channel. Behind him and Kenny, Kyle and Cartman continued to obliterate each other.
Smack. "If you belittle my people one more time I'll tear you nuts off and feed them to Mr Kitty!"
Smack. "You deserve it, you dirty jew rat!"
"Turn it up," Kenny said warily.
Stan obeyed. After a moment, he spared a glance at their bruised and shrieking friends. "Reckon we stop 'em?"
Kenny also spared them a glance, then rolled his eyes back to the TV. "Nah.."
Stan smiled contentedly and slid further down the couch. In the other room, where their parents where, Wham's Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go started up. Stan pulled a face in disgust and increased the volume even further. He was surprised someone hadn't heard Kyle and Cartman and come to break them up. Too drunk, maybe. "So, how cool is this Christmas gonna be, huh?"
"I know, yeah. So long as I don't die this year, I'm happy."
"How that happen again?"
"Plow man."
"Auyeah.."
Stan went quiet for a moment, thinking. His pulse went up as his nerves knotted. "Um..Kenny?"
"Yeah?"
More uncertain than ever, Stan touched his hand.
Justdoitjustdoitjustdoitjustdoit-
When Kenny turned to him questioningly, Stan kissed him.
A few minutes later, managing to pin Cartman beneath him, Kyle looked up. "Hey, where did they go?"
"What?" Cartman wriggled around and craned his head past Kyle's arm, spotting the deserted couch. "Aw, bastards! I bet they've gone for the cake!"
Kyle looked down at Cartman and loosened his grip a little. "Should we go look for them?"
"But Kyyyyyyle, this is our Christmas fight. It's tradition. Should we really have it squandered just for them two pussies?"
Kyle thought for a moment. "Okay, good point." He hesitated, looking a little lost.
"Stupid kyke," Cartman prompted helpfully.
"Oh, right." He hit him. "Fat-ass!"
"Jew!"
And so as the final chorus started up, and a majority of South Park citizens wished each other well, Stan and Kenny found themselves a dark corner, and Kyle and Cartman proceeded to tear each other apart.
LOL, the cheesiness! Merry Christmas, everyone!
South Park copyrighted to Matt and Trey, fic title and Wake Me Up copyrighted to Wham.