Summary: [sasusakuShe bought a diamond ring for herself, because she knew HE would never give one to her anyway...
Disclaimer: don't own
Solitaire
He who has never hoped can never despair-George Bernard Shaw
Warm, comforting air rushed against her body as she slowly opened the door of the quaint store and stepped within. The dulcet chime of a small bell just above the glass door signalled her entrance and the old, balding man behind the counter raised his eyes from his leisurely novel to glance at the customer. The action reminded her of Kakashi-sensei, except the books he reads are rather indecent. She inwardly giggled at the allusion before scanning her eyes over the generous amount of jewels that were displayed behind the protective glass.
The musty, dull lighting of the small store did little to detract from the shimmering glow of all the many jewels, jewellery and trinkets. Sakura placed her fingers on the glass counter as her body moved so she could find the particular jewel she had set her mind, and heart on.
A thin sheen of dust covered the glass, as her eyes and fingers danced on the surface, it wasn't exactly surprising. The store was not the most conspicuous retailer, actually the discreet corner where it was situated and the shadows of the other larger buildings hid its worn façade.
Sakura herself had never even noticed the ancient looking shop before, on her personal shopping excursions; it was Ino-pig who introduced her to the place when she was madly hunting for the perfect earrings. Ino had a date later on that day with Shikamaru and had literally dragged Sakura out for some quality retail therapy.
But the rest of the experience became a blur when her emerald eyes noticed the tiny silver and diamond solitaire ring perched prettily in its velvet blue case. The pads of her fingers instinctively brushed the surface of the glass case separating her from the ring in a pointless attempt to admire the particular jewellery better.
She remembered the first time the ring had held her gaze and as cliché as it sounded, the simplistic beauty of the single clear diamond and the thin band of silver it sat on made her heart stop. An image of navy and black combined with white flashed through her mind when abruptly the atmosphere became dolorous.
Sakura convinced herself that the ring had no significant attachment to him, to Sasuke-kun. Yet the hazy picture of his face when she stared at the ring haunted her conscience endlessly.
Maybe it was a marketing ploy, a genjutsu that the jeweller had laid on the ring to attract more customers to buy. But even that pathetic excuse seemed impossible, it was just downright lame and the more she concentrated on it, the more she became mentally and emotionally attached to the ring.
"I see you have become enamoured with that little beauty", Sakura switched out of her haze and berated her ninja skills for becoming distracted by a ring and allowing an old man to surprise her. She nodded when his cheery smile suddenly made the store seems even warmer than it already was and she couldn't help but smile back, although her smile didn't reach her eyes nor did it look natural.
Damn, both Sasuke and Sai were influencing her too much with their emotionless personalities; it was almost like a fight, not for Konoha or for her friendship, but for her to just be herself. "I miss your old smile Sakura-chan" Naruto's steadfast voice sounded in her memories and she felt guilty, it was almost like she was betraying him.
Through all her inhuman growth both in strength and intelligence as the apprentice of Konoha's own Godaime, the inclination to cry never escaped her, and it undermined all the effort she put into ameliorating her weaknesses.
"Would you like to try it on?" the storekeeper asked her after witnessing her transfixion with the ring, she lifted her tilted face upwards "alright". He bent downwards and slid open the glass chest, the slight friction noise went ignored as Sakura watched him gently take out the ring in its case.
His wrinkled hand placed the case in front of Sakura and she couldn't help but become even more attracted by the minute ring. Her hands gingerly pulled the thin silver band out of its case and she instinctively slipped it onto her marriage finger. The old man noticed this action and smiled even more as he slightly chuckled.
"Should I congratulate you?" "You know if you want your partner to buy-"
"I'm buying it for myself" Sakura cut him off without looking at the man and he paused slightly, perhaps abashed at her light impudence. "I understand" he replied after a brief silence. Do you?
She had noted how perfectly the ring had eased onto her slightly calloused finger and now sat so delicately pretty on her pale hand. Back when she was still naïve, still a genin, still innocent, she had daydreamed about her Sasuke-kun being the one to slide a gloriously large diamond ring on her finger subsequently after he had proposed and admitted his undying love.
But now that she was older, perhaps wiser and definitely no longer deliriously blinded by infatuation, she was reminded how impossible the dream really was. In reality Sasuke would never buy a beautifully large diamond ring for her, he wouldn't propose to her and he would definitely never enunciate his 'undying love' for her. Wouldn't he?
Sakura had long become aware that dreams, hopeless dreams never had a chance to take flight, she had realised that when Sasuke stood behind her, with his chilling breath caressing her neck and severed her hope with his parting. "Sakura…thank you" to her those fated words didn't seem so gratifying and consequently she had developed a phobia of gratitude. Whenever someone would express their gratitude to her, for her skills in saving their life or something less significant, she couldn't help but be slightly sceptical at their authenticity. "You're welcome…"
The craftsmanship of the diamond was truly meticulously beautiful, the cut of each facet and the white clarity of the jewel gave an illusion of infinite depth. It was so purely white against the peach skin of her left hand and the harmony instigated an imagery of pink and white.
It was the painting of the perfect wedding, open and undisclosed to the world, with copious blooming white and pink cherry blossoms aligning the side. The petals would flutter onto the audience and they would gracefully dance around the couple in the centre of the picture.
Her heavy white dress, untainted and unblemished. The dark colours of his hair and his eyes clashed so congruously with his suit, the surroundings, with her. It was the dream whenever she closed her eyes, like a malicious, saprophytic disease clawing at her subconscious. But it soon turned into a nightmare, as the curse mark would ignite and contaminate his beauty; he became corrupted with darkness and transformed into a monster. One with large hand-like wings, ugly and long unruly hair and eyes like a void staring into her soul.
The curse started to stain her wedding dress, the pure white fabric slowly dyed black and the clarity of the background became so grotesquely black. Yet she did nothing to stop it, did she even want to? Her mind pulled away before the image became something that was too painful to bear, it was caused a dull pain in her chest. Perhaps it was her heart breaking. No, her heart was already broken.
Sakura shook her head lethargically, it wasn't him, it wasn't her Sasuke-kun. Was it?
Her heart contracted numbly in her chest as she felt the prick of tears gathering in her eyes. She quickly closed her eyes and tried to halt the one weakness she had never really relinquished.
"I want to buy it" she reiterated dumbly after remembering she had previously told him that the money would be her own and no one else's. It was rather drastic, to spend her sixteen years of diligent savings on a single diamond ring. Her weekly wages, her parent's birthday money and the congratulatory presents from friends and relatives, were all going to be exorbitantly spent on a single item. One that wasn't even really required, it was redundant and not the most prudent economical decision, but she was compelled to buy it.
She viewed it as a reward, for her recent developments, and many people had complimented her exponential developments as a medic-nin. She was well aware of the whispers that she would soon exceed her own shishou and became proud of her personal achievements. It was what she continually convinced herself, the ring was for her, only her. Not because it reminded her of him, really.
Even when she younger, before the birth of innocence, her mother had ignited her love for rings and she could outwardly feel the felicity of the nostalgic memory.
A five year old Sakura silently watched her mother bending over to spray the flowers with nourishing water. They were on the balcony and the yellow rays of the sun revealed the obvious beauty of the ruby and gold wedding ring on her mother's bony finger. She couldn't help but stare at it with an open mouth, how come she had never paid attention to it before?
Her rather rude stare was broken by her mother's giggles and Sakura suddenly blushed with embarrassment. "That was rather cute expression Sakura". She moved her gaze from the ring to her mother's youthful countenance, while her face burned even deeper as her mother smiled wider.
"You like my wedding ring don't you?" her mother stopped watering the pot flowers and walked over to where Sakura sat, she stuck her hand out so her daughter could gain a better view of the piece of jewellery that captivated her.
The rich cerise stone and the timelessness of the gold radiated their unwavering beauty in Sakura's eyes. "You know, your father bought this ring for me in the capital of fire country and the jeweller said that it is one of kind" her mother recited, obviously proud of the opulence of the ring, yet Sakura could only stare at the way light merged with the ruby.
Curiosity accumulated within her and before she could hesitate "Why do people give others rings okaasan?" her mother glanced at her wide green eyes before reverting her gaze to the ring the two of them were admiring.
"It's more than just a ring Sakura" "To me it's a symbol of the love your father dedicates to me, and the love I reciprocate".
"But I think that everyone has a different reason to give each other rings, usually it's a gesture of marriage, but not necessarily"
Her mother once again looked into Sakura's eyes as her own viridian eyes creased in a sincere smile. "Sometimes we just need something tangible to remind us of the love… the hope."
At that time her father had been in hospital after he suffered a serious dose of the flu, and perhaps her mothers words proclaiming hope were referred to the hope that her father would heal. Yet she realised the validity of her words in the present. Hope, I hope for your happiness Sasuke-kun.
Ino had made a remark on how plain the ring was and that diamonds were becoming too common, she herself specifically stated she preferred sapphires. Sakura mentally objected to her perspective, the simplicity of the ring was the reason it was so beautiful in her eyes. The undiluted whiteness of the stone had so much meaning, so much potential, it represented so much of Sakura's life.
Initially it was the coldness the ring exuded that attracted Sakura, and reminded her of Sasuke, his crude remarks, the emotionless of his entire being and the challenging mysteriousness of his introverted mien. She didn't understand why she chose to emotionally abuse herself by caring so whole-heartedly for someone so frozen.
Yet she could comprehend the allure of the stolidity they both displayed, the ring was so beautiful and so was he.
Sakura reached into her pocket and extracted a medium sized manila envelope, "I've already prepared the exact amount of money" and handed the envelope to the old storekeeper. He nodded slowly and after counting the money placed the case into a small white bag, while Sakura still wore the ring on her finger.
"SAKURA-CHANNNNNN" Narutos boisterous voice echoed through the ramen stand and Sakura was pretty sure it reverberated quite a distance down the road as well. She beamed back at him after offering a friendly wave and sat beside him, while Kakashi sat on his other side.
She leaned past Naruto's wide grin to greet her sensei "Hey Kakashi-sensei" and he returned the gesture with a genuinely happy smile at the crease of his one eye.
"Man I'm starving, I haven't had ramen for a whole day" Sakura couldn't help but giggle at his ridiculous love for the food "Geez Naruto, calm down will you, you act like your going to die if you don't eat Ramen for 24 hours or something". Naruto grinned widely and Sakura proceeded to give her order to the chief Teuchi.
"But its true, I tried asking the team leader on the mission if I could bring a few packets of ramen on the mission, but he flat out refused" "I swear it was the worst few days of my life, I was pretty sure I started to have withdrawal symptoms because of the lack of ramen".
Sakura rolled her eyes before thanking the Teuchi for her beef flavoured ramen and it was then she noticed the other four empty bowls Naruto had in front of him. "Naruto, you better have enough money to pay for all that, because I'm not going to chip in for you" she warned as he temporarily halted in his incessant gulps of literally drinking the noodles.
She heard Kakashi laugh in his deep voice behind his ever-present book of entertainment, and Naruto just looked rather despondent and pouted at her. "Aw, come on Sakura-chan I'll promise to pay you back" he grabbed her arm as though he was begging for her life.
"As if Naruto, you never pay me back-"her words died in her throat as she saw Naruto staring suspiciously at the ring on the hand he had just grabbed. He opened and closed his mouth in a fish-like action, but his brain couldn't process enough intelligence to string together a complete sentence.
"WHAT IS THAT SAKURA-CHAN?" "IS IT AN ENGAGEMENT RING? ARE YOU GETTING MARRIED?" the explosiveness of his voice attracted the attention of Kakashi who put down his orange book to see what Naruto was so worked up about, even the chief stopped his work to stare at Sakura.
She grew vexed at his accusations and hastily retracted her hand from his grasp "Of course not, I haven't even been in a relationship" "This is just a ring I bought today; it's sort of like a present for myself, to cheer myself up a little". Sakura noticed the curious suspicion cross his face before he stretched into one of his traditional grins "Man, your rich Sakura-chan, maybe one day you could buy one for me"
An undignified snort came out of her, before she hit Naruto across the head for being so upfront and selfish. On the side of her eyes she could see Kakashi's lingering stare at the diamond ring with a strangely blank face, before he lifted the latest edition of Icha Icha to his eyes again.
The rest of the meal passed by with a thick, but comforting silence and Sakura finished her bowl of ramen before deciding to retire to her home. "Well see ya Naruto, Kakashi-sensi, its getting late and I have an early operation tomorrow" she gave a farewell smile and raised her hand in a wave.
Her foot set at the entrance of the door before Naruto's unnaturally quiet voice penetrated her ears "Tsunade baa-chan is going to send us out in a mission to retrieve Sasuke soon". A flame within her reignited, but she pushed it down and continued to walk out of Ichiraku.
"Ok" her figure disappeared and her shadow soon followed.
"Sakura-chan took that a little to well, didn't she?" Naruto's face twisted into a serious grimace and for the second time that night a pregnant pause followed his words. "Yea" Kakashi slowly broke the silence and the part of his face that wasn't covered by the black mask mirrored Naroto's expression.
A lingering shiver spread almost painfully through her body and she wasn't sure whether it was due to Sasuke's kusanagi tightly pressed to the delicate flesh of her neck, or due to Sasuke himself. A cold aura emanated from his body which loomed dangerously close to her thin frame.
The penetrating gaze of his dark eyes stared impassively at Sakura's pale face, her eyes, and her soul. The dryness of her fair green gaze courageously held his hard gaze, but the sudden brush of his arm with her naked shoulder shattered her own blank visage as she felt the pinkness rush to her cheeks. Sakura tilted her face downwards to escape his scrutinizing eyes and was only faced with his open chest, causing her to blush even more profusely.
Sasuke leaned his face closer to hers, and Sakura felt stifled at the overwhelmingly close proximity, their lips paralleled each other and she could feel the life of his breath fanning her mouth.
His raven hair teased her sensitive flesh and she observed his mesmerising handsomeness, the harsh years had been generous to him and she almost felt envious at the surreal beauty he possessed. Yet he was so ugly within.
The slick, cool blade sharpened its hold on her neck, pressing insidiously on her external jugular vein. The death would be painless, swift, she wouldn't feel a thing. It was almost humane.
Almost.
She had seen it done before in silent observation and she had done it herself, with apathy. The abrupt dislocation of her blood supply to her cerebral hemisphere would be immediately effective. Despite this, the notion of a painless death didn't grant her as much comfort as she had hoped, because it wouldn't be painless.
An almost silent tap of the metal would have been unnoticed by normal ears, but Sasuke's shinobi senses could hear the contact lucidly. He bent his face towards the source of the noise and saw the necklace adorned around her pale neck, but it was the ring that dangled gracefully at the end that caught his attention. Something strange flashed across his eyes in a fleeting moment, before dissolving into their normal placidity.
"I see you have moved on" the deep sound of his voice awoke Sakura from her momentary stupor as she followed his gaze to her chest where her small diamond ring dangled.
She was surprised at his words, but was slightly disappointed in the lack of emotion that laced them. Perhaps she hoped he would realise something, reveal something, feelings, anything. Show that he was jealous.
Sasuke's eyes darkened when she didn't make an effort to reply to his words "It was about time you stopped acting so pathetic and realised that your dream would be hopeless and impossible". Once again he cracked something within her, and left another mark on her dilapidated heart. This time she couldn't keep her eyes dry anymore and before she could make a motion to stop it, a lone tear escaped their confines and dripped down her cheek.
She didn't care that her sword was threatening to end her life, her hand flew to her face and she desperately scraped away the offending tears. Her mask cracked. "I bought it myself, for myself". He was the fourth person she had tried to convince that the ring was purely for her own selfishness, for her own heart, just for herself. Not that the ring had reminded her of him.
Sakura felt the tears cease and she gained an unusual resolve "Are you really going to kill me Sasuke-kun?" her voice broke, even though she had whispered her question. Yet it was almost rhetorical as she didn't really want an answer and he most likely wasn't going to give her one.
The blade slipped lower and she closed her eyes when the pressure increase and she felt the acute sting of pain as the kusanagi moved ever so slowly. But the pain was there, the pain of death was there when it wasn't supposed to be and Sakura moved her arm to the place his blade had been, while her chain broke and the ring feel to the ground.
Wet blood met her fingers as her shallow wound drummed a mute pain through her chest, it was then when she realised he had missed her neck and instead sliced just below her collarbone. He had missed her vital point.
Before Sakura could gather her emotions, both of them snapped their heads around to the new chakra. "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HER TEME" Naruto leaped into view with abnormal blood-red irises and flaming chakra that radiated off his distorted body in waves.
A ball of blue chakra gathered in his hand as he sped towards Sasuke, and he detached himself from Sakura's shocked body. Naruto's rasengan missed its intended target and instead caused an explosion as it collided with a tree when Sasuke's speed exceeded him. He bared his extended canines and sped off after Sasuke leaving Sakura alone with wide eyes.
She could hear the explosiveness of their power, she could feel it as the ground rumbled and the previous traumatic shock no longer blocked her cognitions. He had finally left a mark that was visible. Sakura gathered green chakra into her own hand and healed the wound until all that was left, was the sanguine blood that stained her clothes and a faint white line. It will always remain.
Her legs felt numbly unresponsive, but she mentally convinced herself to move and stop her boys from killing each other, killing her.
Sakura was sure Kakashi-sensei was screaming at her to leave the two alone, but her ears couldn't hear anything and she continued to run towards the place where the battle was occurring. By the time she had arrived both were taking a momentary reprieve as their simultaneous attack had negated and only drained them heavily of chakra.
The fight was extremely even, as Naruto's battered body was reflected in Sasuke's own and their attention turned to her when she walked up to them. Sakura noticed the literal transformation of the second stage of Sasuke's curse, and was immediately reminded of the painting of the wedding; the Sasuke before her and the one in her nightmare were so similar. They are the same person; it IS her Sasuke-kun.
"Stop it Naruto" her request shocked him as the tension flowed out of his body to be replaced by confusion. "Sasuke-kun's adamant to gain his revenge and nothing we do will ever be enough for him" her own words seemed foreign to her, while Sasuke could only stare at her in recognition. She had finally understood.
"He will never be happy if we take him back"
never be happy with us
Naruto's fist unclenched beside him as he digested her words "It's his own choice…his own mistake" Sasuke silently glared at her but made no move to deny her claims.
"But sakura chan I promised- " he cried out to her as a last resort, but she had cut him off. "And since you promised me, I think if anyone, I hold the right to alter the terms of that promise", was she giving up? Naruto didn't want to give up, he would never give up, Sasuke was his one of his first friends, and he was like a brother to him.
"I don't want you to get hurt over him" her pleading voice sounded oddly ironic, while she was twelve, she had pleaded with Sasuke to stay in Konoha. Now that she was sixteen, she was pleading with Naruto to let him go.
Sakura boldly walked towards Naruto and grabbed his hand in her own, her back was facing Sasuke and she would never see the flash of emotion that uncharacteristically flew across his face. "Let's go Naruto, when and if Sasuke-kun wants to come back he will, it's just not up to us to decide". It was never up to us to decide.
She pulled him away from the battle and barely spared a glance at Sasuke who stood unmoving across from them. Truthfully she felt no pain, not anymore. Or maybe she did, but chose to ignore it, after all she was getting used to concealing the hurt.
Sakura's tiny hand calmed the bleeding, burning hands of Naruto and his body moved with her, but his eyes continued to glare at Sasuke. For the second time in his life Sasuke felt so hopeless, isn't this, what he wanted? While for the first time in his life, it was Sakura and Naruto who were walking away from him. Yes it's what he wanted.
Kakashi's lazy eyes heeded to the subtle emotions hidden within his students, and he couldn't do anything to dull the pain or heal the raw scars of their hearts. The fight was never concluded, yet they all looked like they had lost, and indeed they had. He saw Sakura and Naruto walking towards him ready to go home, yet their hearts were not contained within their cumbersome bodies. Their hands were intertwined together but they did not feel the unity, they felt so separated, so alone, without Sasuke.
Sakura's eyes lingered on the ground battling to control her tears, she had not died, but she definitely did not feel alive.
Now she realises, so painfully that she shouldn't love him.
If only she could convince her heart.
A stealthy figure landed with incredible silence upon the upturned ground of the damp forest floor, his vermilion eyes traced over the darkness of the earth. A dim spark caught his attentive eyes and his lips curled into a bare smirk when he had found the item he had been searching for.
He delicately picked up the thin ring which lied so beautifully on the rough, stale dirt and examined it with hidden interest. The moonlight did not glow brightly through the thick foliage, and the stars only touched the navy sky with a dim gleam, but the diamond seemed to channel its own incandescent light.
The black-haired figure pocketed the diamond ring before once again jumping off into the abyss of the chilling night.
"Sometimes we just need something tangible to remind us of the love… the hope."
Fin.
Finished my first Naruto oneshot, hope you guys liked it! Please leave a comment!