Disclaimer: No I don't own Pokemon if I did being able to defeat Dragonite with a Wigglytuff would have happened a long time ago
A/N: This fanfic was inspired by the meme of Jigglypuff dragon slayer floating around the web however for the purposes of this fic the Fairy Type doesn't exist
Warning's: In case you have a problem against Yaoi I'm going to let you know from the start that this will eventually be a Yaoi if you don't like it don't read it. However for now it's rated T for cursing.
Of Crazy escapes and bratty little girls
As far back as I can remember I've always been a little different from my family. My family you see is a family of type specialist pokemon trainer's. Believe me that title carries a lot more weight than you would think. Don't even get me started on the rants about tradition I heard growing up from my dad.
Speaking of my dad I should probably tell you he is a fighting type specialist and he looks the part too. At 6'7" my dad is a powerful man especially with his hard grey eye's and his pitch black hair mixing with his one-hundred pounds worth of muscle that he earned with his constant judo. My dad's starter was a Riolu that is now a powerful Lucario named Ace. On top of my dad's Lucario he also raised three Tyrouge triplets who are now a Hitmonchan named Rai, Hitmonlee named Lee, and Hitmontop named Jay respectively. My dad is also well known for both his Hariyama named Bertha and his Medicham named Ryu and trust me when I say all six of them are very strong.
Next there is my mom who is a poison type specialist, scary I know. My mom's starter Lamia is the single most frightening Seviper you'll ever meet. Ground and psychic type's really shouldn't think they have an advantage over my mom though thanks to Ursula my mom's Tentacruel and Pete my mom's Skuntank. My mom is particularly proud of both Beth my mom's Nidoqueen and Vlad my mom's Crobat. But than again you really shouldn't underestimate my mom's baby: Her Toxicroak named Elphaba she raised from an egg.
Than there is my older sister Eden who is an ice type specialist, mom and dad were so proud ugh gag me with a spoon. She started off with the single most snobby Cubchoo you ever did meet and yes he is named something pretentious: Forste, he only got worse when he evolved. Eden also has a Mamoswine named Turner who is something of a bully and an anorexic looking Jynx named Wanda. Than there is my sister's three darling's: Yuki her bitchy Frosslass, Sif her Abomasnow who enjoys freezing people's food just before they bite into it, and of course Glacia her vain as all hell Weavile.
Even my little brother is such a source of pride for my parent's and yes they do host fancy and highly pretentious dinner parties just so they can brag. He already has the single most annoying Growlithe in the world named Red. Than there is my brother's Heat Rotom and his Numel otherwise known as the family prankster's Poof and Goof are their names. My brother also has a Slugma with a penchant for eating paper named slime, a Houndour who growls at everything named Shadow, and a Larvesta who likes to shed everywhere named Beauty.
As for me, my parent's can't figure out what's wrong with me as my only pokemon and my best friend in the whole world is my Jigglypuff: Liam. My parent's offered to get me another normal type but I turned them down. You see I don't want to be a type specialist at all and I have a plan to get out of it too. I've been saving up my money for months now and I've had my trainer's license since I was five. Come tomorrow morning at Breakfast Liam is gonna sing a song for me and we will be on our way to freedom, I can't wait.
One of the good thing's about being raised in a family of fanatical pokemon trainer's is that when you finally manage to convince them that yes you really do want that spunky male Jigglypuff that really did rip that old women's wig off before throwing it into another old woman's lemon meringue pie that she'd worked really hard all day on starting an old lady fight they agree to help you train it. End result is Liam a beefed up level 15 Jigglypuff that know's Sing, Round, Shadow Ball, and Hyper Voice. He learned Round and Shadow Ball due to the oh so very helpful intervention of my sister who decided to donate two TM's to what she deemed a tragedy. Hyper Voice was the end result of him spending too much time around my Nana who is a retired move tutor and her Exploud named Bob. One of these days I'm going to get her back for teaching him his now preferred method of waking me up in the morning.
Anyway this is a good thing because if he doesn't knock my parent's out at breakfast with sing so we can escape he has a slim chance of stopping them from getting to their pokeballs so they don't stop me. It was imperative they don't stop me so I can achieve my dream of beating Lance's Dragonite with Liam. I even dream of the epicness of it and make Liam practice his victory pose. But in order to do that I have to escape this place which is why I packed last night.
As is my tradition I went downstair's just as my mother finished cooking her breakfast. I waited the five minutes for my brother to show up before I acted. Just as my mom was getting up to fill the pokemon food bowls I put on earmuffs and released Liam calling out "Now Liam it's our chance use sing,". The result of this was Liam taking a deep breath before singing "Jig Jigglypuff Jiggullyyypuff , Jig Jigglypuff Jigullyy," causing my entire family excluding me to fall asleep.
Liam than hopped on my shoulder's and I ran up-stair's grabbed my bag and me and Liam we out that door and on our way. Me and Liam were originally going to head to Fuschia City the nearest town from where I lived before I realized one problem, my family lives in the middle of a freakin' forest. After walking randomly for a while I stepped out into a clearing only to realize I'm on Route 15.
Heading towards Fuschia city I was nearly there when the shrillest voice I had ever heard screamed "I challenge you to a battle loser,". Turning around I see what looks like a little blonde girl wearing a pink sundress and a pink garden hat with matching pink sandles. In a word I was horrified by the sheer offence she was making to Liam by looking so very gaudy in that color. Enraged on Liam's behalf I respond "Say what now?" stupidly.
Huffing with a clear attitude the little monstrosity in front of me says "Are you a retard or something?". Rolling her eyes she says slowly as if she were talking to a slow person "I challenge you to a battle, got it idiot," she finished in a snotty manner. Pulling out Liam's pokeball I just nod at her. Smirking darkly she throws her Pokeball and out pop's a Venomoth "I dare you to try and beat Lavender,".
Releasing Liam from his pokeball I was awaiting the horrified gasp but what I got instead was a peal of hysterical laughter "Y- y- y- you use a Jigglypuff BAHAHAHAHAHA!". Getting angry now I tell Liam to use Hyper voice causing him to bounce up and suck up air before releasing a huge shockwave of pure sound knocking her Venomoth unconscious immediately. "Holy shit," said the little brat who than attempted to walk off after withdrawing her pokemon. Clearing my throat I rather pointedly say "Aren't you forgetting something," screaming in frustration she throws half her money at me before stomping off. Looking at Liam I smile and say "That went well huh?.
After arriving in Fuschia city I immediately booked a room in the pokemon center. After setting up my belonging's in the room I went to the boys locker room to take a shower. Looking at myself in the mirror while I waited on the rather inferior boys back there to finish with one of the stalls I realized that despite all my internal monologging to my imaginary viewer's on the television program I like to pretend I'm a character in I failed to describe myself how rude of me. I'm an average height for a 16 year old boy at 5'10", I weigh an average weight but no matter how I tried I couldn't gain weight resulting in me being ridiculously skinny. My hair is pitch black except for my bangs which
are permanently died pink in honor of Liam and my eyes were a silver color that looks good on me. My name is Lucas and I will be the Pokemon champion but first I stink and need a shower.