Takes place after the war is over and Sasuke is back in Konoha.
Inspired by the song Broken Crown-Mumford & Sons(My absolute favorite song of theirs)
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, just the plot and my thoughts.
Touch my mouth and hold my tongue
I'll never be your chosen one
I'll be home safe and tucked away
Well You can't tempt me if I don't see the day,
He lies awake in the night, unfocused eyes staring into the dotted patterns across the white ceiling. The bed beneath him that was once familiar now felt as though it belonged to someone else. Someone that had not yet been tainted with the sin of revenge, bloodshed. Blood that he had induced and blood he was unable to stop from spilling over. Blood that still clouded his vision, and awoke him from restless sleep late in the night. Heaving - heaving for breath as he examined the hands that were drenched in thick crimson moments ago to be in a sheen of sweat, pale and colorless...
No more could he discern dream from reality.
A recurring knock at the door, earns the clench of his jaw, he remains still... silently willing her to leave. Her... It's always, only her.
Day after day, night after night, she comes with wistful smiles, and hopeful eyes.
She will never understand...
The pull on my flesh was just too strong
Stifled the choice and the air in my lungs
Better not to breathe than to breathe a lie
'Cause when I opened my body I breathe in a lie,
He could not give her what she wanted. He could not live in the illusion that everything was forgotten, all was forgiven, and all would be well again. No, he could never forget, not when his nightmares continued to keep it fresh in his mind. Not when it was all still his reality. His clan was extinct, he was the only one of his kind left...
It mattered not who stood beside him now, he was alone. His brother had not spared him no - he had forsaken him...
The turn of the door knob ignites his anger further. But he gives no reaction, even as he hears light foot steps pad across the cold carpet, coming to stand at the foot of his bed. Still, he remains motionless, refuses to acknowledge her... because he knows what will be reflected across her face.
He knows what she will say...
I will not speak of your sin
There was a way out for Him
The mirror shows not
Your values are all shot,
"Sasuke-kun."
White becomes of his knuckles as he clenches the sheets at his sides. She moves closer - closer, coming to stand beside his laid form. He clasps his eyes shut when he feels her fingers brush lightly across his knotted hands, coaxing them to loosen... To let go.
"Please... Don't do this to yourself..." She whispers pleadingly, desperately, closing her caressing hand over his own. His anger surfaces, creasing his brow and eyes open vermilion. He pulls away from her warmth as though it is hot as a scorching fire, sitting forward as he does.
But oh my heart, was flawed I knew my weakness
So hold my hand, consign me not to darkness
Amidst it all, he yearns - yearns to hope as she does... but it is not possible.
A dark - seething glare owns his features, she flinches and he is satisfied. He is always satisfied when he hurts her because he does it for her own good... because she is still a forgiving, naive fool. He does not deserve mercy, her mercy - wouldn't even allow himself to entertain the thought... Not when he has turned his blade on her too.
Does she not understand? Does she not see that she cannot fix what has been broken - destroyed beyond repair?
He is tormented, yes... but he has tormented as well.
So crawl on my belly 'til the sun goes down
I'll never wear your broken crown
I took the road and I fucked it all away
Now in this twilight, how dare you speak of grace
Everything may have started with Itachi, it may have been out of his hands when he was just a child... but he chose the path that led him to where he is now... he must endure its sow.
And he cannot stand the sight of her, the melancholy of her face. It does something to him - it causes him to feel something aside from the hatred and anger within... The mattress dips with the shifting of his weight and he is walking past her standing frame. She turns and reaches for his bare shoulder, connecting with its smoothness.
Provoked further, he turns on her once more, disregarding his inner turmoil at the sight of her, and channels the stronger, more familiar emotion, the raging fury still radiating in abundance, "Leave."
Her glossy eyes narrow with the need to understand, she shakes her head, "No."
His fingers clench against his palm with increasing impatience, his breathing becoming haggard,"Get out."
"I wont."
He walks - strides away from her.
She follows - always follows, stubborn as she is. Shouting pleads to stop, to listen... but he will not - can not.
Nearly ripping the door off its hinges, she grips at his shoulders with relentless hands.
Flinching at the contact, his fist pounds and disappears within the jagged edges of the wall beside the door.
Panting - bleeding, with his hand still hidden inside the white plaster, her arms move around him, enveloping him from behind. She begins to weep against him, tears fall over his neck and shoulders, cascading down his back. He pulls his hand free and grips the walls, to steady his swaying, he's breathing too heavily.
"I - I love you."
"Stop." His nails dig into the paint of the walls.
"I cant... Your hurting, please - please let me-"
"Get the fuck out." Gasping - he gasps for breath, hands move to unwind the grip she has on his front.
Her hold tightens, pressing her warmth into him further,"I forgive you-" she cries with conviction, his efforts falter at her words,"So stop this - stop pushing me away! ...Please, Sasuke-kun..."
A palpitation of his heart ensues, catching him off guard with its beating existence. He closes his eyes shut, leaning his head against the wall, breathing still ragged... though the hands that were trying to dissuade her grip around him, now covered hers, resting atop them.
Was he so easy to read? ...Had he lost his Uchiha nature of never letting the one before him know what he was thinking? Could she really see the ever-present war waging within? Tormenting - eradicating what was left of his soul?
"Will you ever forgive yourself..?" She whispers against his skin.
He sucks in a sharp breath, clamping his arms firmly around her own, willing them to stay... to hold him together.
"I don't know if I can... Sakura."
He chokes, his pale form shudders with the force, and she is there...
Crying the tears that he cannot produce... she cries - cries until his shaking - panting form is still.
She strokes his bare stomach and chest as though he was a broken - fragile child... and he is.
She holds him in silence... and he breathes - really breathes, for the first time without the immense weight of guilt and condemnation pressing down, threatening to compress - quash his lungs...
She is there - always there... patient, stubborn, selfless.
...and unprecedented - he is satisfied.
So, this came to me after I had every word of the song memorized and lyrics studied... I feel it fits Sasuke's Character soo well and makes me want to cry for him and all he's been through... Originally I thought of it in a spiritual sense(I am a Christian) But it can be interpreted in many ways, I'm just giving my two cents, so please no bashing or debates.
Basically the song is about the injustice of 'Grace' (The ever-present Grace of God) and in the case of this fic, it is about the injustice of Sakura Haruno... because no matter what he's done, or put her through she is still the same... forgiving, loving and patient. He's never had to earn it, she freely gives it to him, because she loves him.
There's much much more to the song and I'd love to chat about it if any of you were interested... I hope you enjoyed this piece, I attempted to take on a poetic scene. Lol, you let me know if it worked.
Please review, I'd love to hear your thoughts! :))