Disclaimer: I do not own Lost or any of the characters in this story. I am making no profit off of this story.

The Final Morning

With nervous hands, Kate Austen zipped the last compartment of her dusty backpack closed. Her eyes were heavy with sleep and stung from being deprived of rest. She had been up most of the night, sitting in front of a fire. The flames reflected her emotional state--switching from strong and bright to weak and dull when the winds blew. Even now she had butterflies in her stomach and she was in a constant state of unease. Slinging her backpack over her shoulder, she ran her hands over her untidy hair and took a deep breath in an effort to compose herself.

This was the morning they were getting off of the island. This was the moment she and the others had been waiting for since the day of the crash. Unfortunately, many of them weren't here to see the glorious sunrise that offered deliverance and salvation. A wave of sadness crept over her, but she tried to keep her mood up. This was supposed to be a happy day.

"Ready to go?" Jack Shepherd asked in place of 'good morning.' His smile was small and sober. The early morning sun cast a warm glow on the doctor's tired, haggard-looking face. So, Jack hadn't gotten any sleep last night either. Although, Kate had a hunch he hadn't been kept awake with the same feelings of indecision that had plagued her.

Kate gave him a half-hearted smile in return.

"Yeah. Almost." She ran her left hand up her other arm in a gesture meant to dispel a chill, but it was actually a subconscious attempt to brush off the insecurity she was feeling about her decision.

"Do you feel like we aren't supposed to leave just yet?" she inquired of the doctor standing in front of her. Her eyes were fixed on the tiny particles of sand at her feet and she refused to meet the perplexed gaze she knew he was giving her.

"You can't seriously be thinking that," he stated in a gentle, yet chiding, tone. "We're meant to get off this island."

The brunette tilted her head to one side, her hair falling of its own accord around her shoulders and across her forehead, partially hiding the offended look in her eyes.

"I never said we weren't supposed to get off," she said pointedly.

"Then what's the problem?" Jack asked.

"I'm just not sure that now is the right time to leave. I feel like there's something…more," she responded, not having the words to describe the strange feeling that had been eating away at her all night.

Jack moved forward and gripped the sides of her arms in his sure, calloused hands. At first she tensed up, not sure if Jack meant to comfort her or prevent her from running away from the thought of rescue. But then she relaxed and her troubles started to melt away under his touch, as if he were removing the weight from her shoulders and putting it on himself.

His expression became more serious and reserved. Looking at his face, Kate noticed that the lines around his eyes were more prominent than she remembered. He seemed to have aged considerably since she had first met him on the beach. A deep, unfathomable expression had taken over his once bright, hopeful green eyes.

This was the mighty and humble Atlas before her.

"Kate, we're supposed to leave now. We may never get another chance to get off this island, and we can't let the opportunity slip past us. It's now or never. I promise you won't regret it after we're back," he told her in a reassuring voice. "There's nothing for us here."

This wasn't the strongest argument for leaving where she was concerned.

"And what's waiting for me on the mainland? Three square meals a day and an orange jumpsuit?" she said sarcastically—realistically. For her, leaving or staying on the island was a lose-lose situation. If she stayed, she lost Jack. If she left, she lost her freedom.

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," he said, squeezing her arms a little to push out the negative thought, but it lingered in her system.

Kate couldn't help but notice his use of the term 'we' when he spoke. Jack made it seem like they were going to conquer all of their troubles together, but she wondered if he really meant it, or if he would just abandon her like everyone else she had ever loved. There was no questioning whether the doctor loved her or not; he had already told her that he did. The issue was how deeply he cared for her and if it could withstand the trials that they were sure to face.

Kate couldn't see him sticking around while she was in prison. Naturally, he would fade into the background, his visits becoming fewer and farther in between. Then he would tell her that he'd met someone else and that he was continuing on with his life. Lastly, he would apologize before telling her that she wasn't going to be a part of it.

Just the idea of Jack leaving her scared Kate; she needed him in her life. Before her emotions could get the best of her, Kate decided to drop the subject and focus on the matter at hand. She pulled away from Jack's touch and readjusted her backpack on her shoulder, holding onto the strap like a lifeline. The few belongings she had in her bag were everything she had now.

Her whole world could fit inside of a small backpack. Kate smiled at the thought. All she had to her name was: four dirty shirts, three pairs of well-worn pants, a hairbrush, a bar of soap, some undergarments, a handful of seeds from Sun's garden and the toy airplane she cherished. The bare minimum—that's how she had lived for a long time now.

Relative silence passed between the two castaways; however, the normal sounds of the island continued all around them. Waves crashed into the shore, birds cried, and the other remaining survivors bustled about the coastline. Kate stared off into the jungle, lost in her thoughts. Jack repeatedly glanced back to make sure the rescue boat was still waiting for them. It was obvious he was impatient.

Suddenly, a patch of trees started to sway and move, as if someone were pushing them out of the way. Kate's heart jumped, afraid of what could come out of the jungle, but a moment later her fears were calmed. Hurley broke through the tree-line.

"Jack!" he yelled, although it came out as more of a huff than a shout. He was sweating and out of breath from running through the dense jungle. In his arms, he cradled little Aaron, who was crying loudly.

Immediately Jack and Kate ran over to their companion to see what was wrong. Kate pulled a water bottle out of her bag, unscrewed the cap and gave it to the man who was gulping for air. She traded him the bottle for Aaron; the baby squirmed in her arms but his cries lessened considerably.

"What is it? Are you hurt?" Jack asked as Kate forced the water bottle up to his lips with her free hand and he took a swig. "Is the baby hurt?"

"No, dude, the baby's fine. I am too."

"Then what's wrong? Where's everyone else?" Jack inquired, glancing behind him to see if the rest of Locke's group was coming out of the trees at a slower pace.

"It's…" Hurley paused, but not to catch his breath. He gave Kate a questioning glance, then hesitated before saying, "It's Sawyer. He got hurt real bad trying to protect Claire."

Kate's breath hitched in her throat. She knew something was terribly wrong and that Hurley was sugar-coating the news for her sake. The strange, dreadful, feeling came back to gnaw at her insides with a renewed vengeance.

"'Trying?' Hurley, what happened to Claire?" Jack prodded, afraid of the answer, but needing to know.

The robust man looked up at the heavens to help contain the tears that abruptly swelled to his eyes. He bit his bottom lip to help silence the whimper attempting to escape from his throat but it still pushed past the barrier. In the course of a few seconds, Hurley became extremely distraught.

"S..sh..e's dead," he managed to get out as a sob overwhelmed him. After his announcement he collapsed against Jack's chest, nearly knocking him over. The doctor was struck speechless, his eyes wide with disbelief and wonderment. Likewise, Kate remained silent; her thoughts were racing around in her mind, not staying on one possibility long enough to comprehend it completely. The only sounds were of Hurley's sobs and Aaron's fussing.

Kate quickly snapped out of her stupor, realizing that time was of great importance. This matter demanded their urgent attention.

"Where is he?" Kate asked Hurley in a near shout; her tone was harder than she meant it to be, but she didn't apologize. Sawyer was out in the jungle, wounded and unprotected.

"Not more than a mile from here," their concerned friend stated. "He past out, and between him and Aaron I just wasn't able to carry them both."

"Can you take us to him?" the doctor asked and Hurley nodded in response.

Jack's priorities had changed; now that someone was hurt—even if it was Sawyer—he all but forgot about the boat that was waiting for them on shore. In the back of his mind he hoped and prayed that it would still be there when they got back, but his doctor instincts overrode all other thoughts. If he could prevent it, he wasn't going to lose another person…another friend.

"Then let's go," Kate encouraged, her body preparing to tear off into the semi-darkness of the jungle underbrush. Jack glanced in her direction, seeming to want to protest her coming along, but Kate shot him down with an icy stare. There was no way she was staying on the beach when Sawyer was in need of help.

"Okay," Hurley responded, wiping at his eyes with the front of his shirt and turning back to lead them into the jungle. "And Jack," he added, "it's bad."

With that comment the need to reach Sawyer in a timely manner doubled and the three adults, with baby in tow, raced off into the trees. With each step Kate took her heart grew heavier. All of her limbs seemed to be made of lead and Aaron felt like a baby elephant in her arms. She found herself muttering bits and pieces of the prayers she remembered from television and Sunday School classes, although this was more to calm herself then hoping for an actual miracle.

When they reached him, Kate almost dropped the baby. Her mind went momentarily numb and she stood frozen on the edge of the trees. Her brain couldn't compute the scene in front of her. The morning light gave the trio a clear view of their injured friend.

Sawyer was laying in a small clearing, his eyes closed and his breathing labored. On his forehead there was a large gash where the blood had already clotted and dried. As she scanned over the rest of his body, Kate realized how serious his injuries were.

Sawyer's button-down shirt was soaked with wet, red blood and was torn in several places. To Kate, his face seemed pale and the arrogant look that usually graced his features had been replaced with a painful grimace.

"Hurley?" the injured man called out in a gruff voice, not bothering to open his eyes. "That you?"

His friend tried to keep his voice steady when he answered. "Yeah, it's me. I brought help. You're gonna be okay." He turned his back on the man lying on the ground.

"Right?" Hurley added to Jack in a whisper, his voice losing all of its confidence in a single syllable.

"I don't…I can't…" the older man began, "I'm not sure. But I'm going to do everything I can." He gave Hurley's shoulder a reassuring pat and turned to assess the dire situation.

Kate still hadn't moved or said anything. She was still standing in the shade of the trees, in a state of disbelief and denial. Jack would have said she was suffering from shock.

"Dude, I can't take any more blood. I almost fainted getting him this far," Hurley exclaimed, his face turning an unhealthy color when he glanced in Sawyer's direction.

The doctor was sympathetic. "That's okay. You did what you could. And you did good," Jack told him. Again Hurley nodded and moved off to the outskirts of the clearing, slumping down on an old log.

With a deep breath Jack moved in on his hopeless patient. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Kate standing over his shoulder, peering down at the grisly scene. She seemed completely oblivious to what was happening; her eyes were glazed over and she didn't try to stop Aaron from pulling at her hair.

"Kate, maybe you should go sit with Hurley," Jack suggested quietly, wanting to save her from seeing Sawyer's bloody wounds.

"Make her go away Doc. I don't want her to see me like this," Sawyer whispered, although his tone was firm.

Kate didn't know whether to be hurt or angry. When Jack gave her a pointed look, her temper won out.

"No," she exclaimed. "I'm staying here."

Walking over to the two men, she knelt down on the ground while carefully balancing Aaron. Then she reached out and gripped one of Sawyer's hands, which was clenched in a fist at his side. She forced her fingers between his and squeezed to show him she was certain she wanted to stay.

Sawyer tried to wiggle out of her grasp saying, "You shouldn't have to see me like this."

"Stop being self-centered and arrogant," Kate complained, holding his hand tighter. "I'm not leaving."

He turned his head away from her with a frown, but stopped his struggles.

After the debate was settled, Jack quickly and carefully unbuttoned Sawyer's shirt and moved the stained fabric away from the wounds on his abdomen. Jesus, he thought to himself, barely containing the curse that traveled to the tip of his tongue. Kate couldn't look at the bloody mess for long and had to turn her head away.

Just one glance at the bullet holes on the con-man's abdomen told the doctor's experienced eyes that Sawyer was beyond saving. At a hospital he might have had a chance, but out in the wilderness he was a goner. Three quarter sized holes marred the tan skin of his patient, and even without an x-ray Jack knew that he was bleeding internally. From the placement of the injuries, Jack could guess that his kidney, liver and lung were all punctured. He was impressed that Sawyer had lasted this long.

Of course this didn't mean he wasn't going to try and do something for the dying con-man. At the very least he could make Sawyer more comfortable. Digging through the backpack he had brought with him, he searched for any drug that would take the pain away to some extent. Unfortunately all he could find was ibuprofen, which would help but do little more than take the edge off.

"What are you giving him?" Kate asked although her voice seemed distant. Jack looked at her to see that she was now staring at Sawyer's face; a blank expression had come over her features. Jack's heart could almost feel some of the sorrow reflected in the brunette's sad eyes.

"Something to help the pain," Jack answered simply.

"Doc?" Sawyer said after swallowing the pills with some difficulty. "Be honest. I know it's bad, but how long do I have?" The shaggy-haired man was barely able to open his eyes, but he managed to look at Jack while he waited for his answer.

"Not long," the doctor told him sympathetically. His throat seemed to close around the words, not wanting them to be spoken. It was strange; he had expressed his sympathies to numerous families, but he couldn't tell Sawyer he wasn't long for this world while remaining stoic.

"Thanks Jack," Sawyer said, closing his somber eyes again, "for everything." He readjusted himself ever so slightly and grimaced in reaction. "Now, if ya don't mind, I'd like a private word with Kate."

Jack looked at Kate who appeared to rejoin reality when Sawyer said her name. "Alright," the doctor said, standing up. "Call me if you need anything."

"How about some stronger meds?" the dying man replied with a bitter laugh. His amusement made him cough violently, and when it had past, his lips were shiny with blood.

Jack didn't see the humor in Sawyer's statement. He wished he could have done more for his friend and was mad at himself for not being able to. Before leaving he took Claire's baby from Kate and then went to join Hurley. The baby curled in toward his chest and cooed in a contented way.

"Would you do something for me?" Sawyer asked quietly when they were alone. The pain he was feeling was laced through his words.

This question surprised the shaky woman; he wasn't demanding or blackmailing her into something. He was asking.

"Anything," she answered.

"Could you..." he stopped as if embarrassed.

"What?"

"Could you hold me?" He sounded as though he couldn't believe he had just voiced his request.

Kate let out a short laugh while fighting the tears in her eyes. "You want me to hold you?"

"Well, if you're gonna laugh at me then no."

"I'm not laughing at you. It's just not what I expected."

"Well, would you humor me? Think of it as a last request."

"Of course," she said in a small voice, the little mirth she had gone now. Slowly releasing his hand she moved behind his head.

"I ain't got all day here Kate."

That was the understatement of the year. Tucking her feet under herself she gently lifted Sawyer's body against hers, letting him half recline with his bare back on her chest and thighs. He rested his head on her shoulder and let out a harsh breath of air. Kate dipped her head into the crook of his neck and placed a soft kiss there.

Being careful not to touch his injuries, she wrapped an arm around his torso, her hand gripping him around the waist to keep him from sliding down. The other hand she used to play with his dirty hair. Salty tears had started to fall, but she ignored them as they slid down the sides of her face.

"Why did you have to be a hero, James?" she asked him quietly as she stroked his hair.

"I thought you were only a hero if you saved people," he responded, his voice weak but still holding a level of bitterness. "I didn't save Claire. I couldn't."

"It's not your fault. You tried."

"It all happened so fast," Sawyer said as if uninterrupted.

"You saved Aaron," Kate told him, now rubbing her fingers along the rough sides of his face and chin.

"Tell the kid goodbye for me, would ya?"

Kate nodded her head, sending little raindrops down his chest. She couldn't answer him. He was admitting defeat. What was worse was that it seemed he had already come to terms with it. She was the one who was having trouble accepting his fate.

"Don't cry for me Kate," he almost pleaded. "I don't want your sympathy. If I weren't dying and you were on that boat right now you wouldn't give me a second thought."

If he hadn't already been in such pain, she would have slapped him.

"You have some nerve Sawyer. To tell me that I don't care about you at all. To assume that I would forget you." She was disgusted. "I'll never forget you."

"Maybe you should," he commented. His breaths were coming in shorter gasps now and he was fighting for every one.

"Please don't leave me," she said. "I can't say goodbye to you."

"Then don't. Don't say it until you're ready. I'll take it when I can get it."

"Please…" she repeated pathetically.

"The Doc will take care of you. He loves you." Sawyer choked on the blood that spurted from his mouth.

"No," she whispered, bending over him to try and hear his whispered words.

"Take care Freckles. For me, this is goodbye…."

"No…" she repeated. The tears were falling harder now.

"Go catch your boat." The words were almost inaudible over her sobs.

There was no telling how long she sat there, rocking herself back and forth with Sawyer's lifeless body in her arms. She had stopped crying, only because she didn't have anymore tears.

Kate didn't know Jack was behind her until his warm hand gripped her shoulder. His touch wasn't able to lift the heavy weight from her shoulders this time, but she slumped back against his legs, too upset to say anything.

"I'm sorry Kate, but we need to go," Jack said in a quiet voice. "Hurley and Sayid are going to bring his body back to the beach. They already brought Claire's to the boat."

The jungle surrounding them was semi-dark again. She must have sat mourning for a long time. Before she stood, Kate bent forward and brushed her lips across Sawyer's bloody forehead. This was not goodbye.

She stood on shaky legs, her vision going black from the change in altitude. Jack stabilized her for a moment, but her knees failed her. The doctor caught her and she clung to his shirt with an iron grip. Without a thought or a word, the mighty Atlas lifted her from the ground and carried her in his arms.

This was the day they were supposed to have gotten off of the island. Sadly, too many of their friends and fellow passengers were not around to see the glorious sunset that offered them atonement and liberation. This was a sad, sad day.

Author's Note: This idea just came to me after watching an episode. I know it was kind of depressing. I hope to write something a little more upbeat in the future and also have Sawyer live! Tell me what you thought. All comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading!