A/N: Due to popular demand, this is a sequel to the short I made "From One Mother to Another, Thank You Hera" that featured Mira reaching out to Hera one night. I hope you enjoy!
Kanan was on his way to his room for a bit of meditation. For the past couple of days since Ezra had heard about his parents things were…different. Slightly changed. He was there for Ezra whenever he needed him, whether it was just for company or to talk. After the past week Kanan could see that Ezra was feeling better about what happened, but there was still…something around the ship. The ship had a different…air about it. Something was different, or added, he wasn't sure, but something was different. It had troubled him all week. That was why he was going to get some meditation in before they landed on Lothal for another run.
Kanan went past Ezra's room, seeing that it was empty and he briefly wondered where Ezra was, but decided against it. He'd rather not know every single thing he, Zeb, and Sabine got into.
Opening his door, Kanan felt his heart skip beats rapidly and he almost jumped at seeing the grey, shining, mist-like figure sitting on the edge of his bunk. Kanan almost choked on air, not just seeing the figure but then realizing who it was.
Ephraim grinned a little, clearly slightly entertained by Kanan's reaction.
"I did not know that you could sneak up on a Jedi," Ephraim stated.
Kanan just…stared at Ephraim, not sure if he was actually seeing what he was or if the vents were not working properly and Sabine's fumes were creeping through the ship and causing him to get hallucinations. It wouldn't be the first time. But this time Kanan knew it was different. That he wasn't imagining things. In the Force he felt another presence, a very weird and off presence, one that was there and wasn't. He hadn't felt something like that since he thought they were saving Master Luminara.
Staring at Ephraim, Kanan wondered if he was looking at what would be an older Ezra. Ezra was almost a replica of his father. Ezra's cheek bones and chin were different, his were smooth while Ephraim's were more hard, more boxy. Ezra didn't have his more solid build, but Ezra would be tall like his father, Kanan was sure of that once Ezra finally hit his growth spirt. And Ezra had his blue eyes, his nose, and blue-ish thick hair. It even had the same wave. Except for the cheek bones and chin, Ezra almost exactly had his father's face.
Ephraim seemed amuse by Kanan's silence. He asked him, "I would have thought that you'd seen…ghosts before."
Kanan finally found his voice again, "uh…no…not particularly." Only his own.
Ephraim nodded, "interesting…I don't know a lot about Force capabilities or how…that all works."
Kanan didn't know what to say and at that point, it seemed that Ephraim didn't know either. Kanan had no idea why Ephraim was here, and talking to him of all things when Kanan was sure that if Ephraim was here in spirit that he would be talking with Ezra instead of him. Ephraim was a part of Ezra and his personal Force.
"I'm guessing that you…came here for a reason," Kanan stated, his words careful, leading. He knew that Ephraim wanted something from Kanan.
The man nodded, looking down at his legs, his hands tapping the edge of the bed before he placed them on his lap and looked back up at Kanan. Kanan waited patiently, although not knowing what else to do. He had never encountered an actual ghost before. Visions, sure, but not ghosts.
"I wanted to thank you, Kanan." Ephraim told him.
In only five words, Kanan felt something in him swell. Or maybe two things. His chest felt tight and he also felt slightly sick to his stomach. He didn't know if it was for the same reason that he realized he needed to go back to his Jedi routes and teach Ezra or because Ephraim was doing something so important. Ephraim's voice had Kanan hooked on every word. There was sadness and complete sincerity in his words.
"I…I did what was right." Kanan told him, finally finding his words and felt how dry his mouth was.
Ephraim shook his head.
"I can't explain how…you suddenly know everything when you die. There is like this…it's like there is no time. You go back and you see things, you relive things if you wish, but in this vast of timeless space you know everything in such a short time. I know what you did for Ezra, what you are still doing."
Kanan was shocked into silence and was confused to. He didn't know how Ephraim knew what happened, but neither did Ephraim for that matter. But either way, the father was more than grateful.
"Ephraim, I told you, I did what was right." Kanan told him.
The older man shook his head.
"No. It's not just that," the father told him. "You and your crew took him in when after almost seven years no one else had. You are the only ones who ever reached out to him."
Kanan felt his shoulders dropped. It was something he didn't want to think about. The thought had creeped up in his mind before, but Kanan always tried to ignore it. He didn't want to think about that, how Ezra was alone for seven years, a child who no one sought to help. He didn't like to think of Ezra's life like that, how the poor child must have been so alone, scared, hungry, cold… Kanan tried to force it all out of his mind. It wasn't like that now and Kanan would make sure it would never happen again.
Kanan was caught by Ephraim's voice again.
"Mira and I knew that we were taking a chance to do this, to make the radio broadcasts. We never planned on becoming a part of a rebellion but…the day Ezra was born, everything had changed in the galaxy. Had we known what was going to happen we wouldn't have had Ezra because we didn't want to bring a child into that world. It's why Ezra never had any siblings. We didn't want any more of our children to be a part of this. But we had to fight for a better future for Ezra," Ephraim said. "In hindsight…or even while we were making the broadcasts I knew that it was a bad idea to do this with Ezra. We should have been more careful, we shouldn't have made the broadcasts at our own home. We had Ezra to care for and we stupidly took a chance on that. But we thought that if anything would happen to us that someone who was close to us would take Ezra in."
Kanan felt his chest tighten again as he stared at the guilt and sorrow in Ephraim's eyes, how his realization came far too late.
"Because of us, our short-cuts and how we took Ezra for granted while we were making the broadcasts, we weren't the ones who ultimately suffered. It was Ezra."
Kanan shook his head.
"You couldn't have known." Kanan told him and it felt odd for him to be comforting a presence, a ghost.
"I should've." Ephraim said, "for years Mira and I wondered what happened to him. We didn't even know if he was alive."
Ephraim looked up at the Jedi and smiled softly to him.
"But then we heard the broadcast and we knew that something had gone very, very right." Ephraim told him.
"How did you know it was Ezra on the podcast?" Kanan asked him. It was a question that had been in his head ever since he heard what Ezra's parents had done.
"You don't forget the sound of your child's voice when you've been clinging to it for seven years," Ephraim answered him.
Kanan was silent, not really knowing what to say to that. He didn't have children, and it always seemed like a very distant dream, one that he was unsure he wanted to strive for. He understood a sense of family, of loyalty, with the crew and with Depa. Kanan wanted to believe that if he had heard Depa's voice over a broadcast, over a comlink, that he would instantly recognize it. But even if he didn't, Kanan understood what Ephraim was explaining.
"I wanted to personally thank you, Kanan, for taking in my son when no one else would and for giving him a home," Ephraim told him and Kanan was once again tight-chested from the sincerity in his voice.
The Jedi gulped and shook his head, not used to this flattery.
"It was Hera's idea. She's the one who brought it up and who…encouraged me." Kanan told him.
"But you agreed to go to a hard past for my son. You're the one who followed him and reached out to him. You're his teacher." Ephraim told him.
Kanan was silent, taking the words in. He never expected a thank you from Ephraim.
"Thank you, Kanan." Ephraim told him, "for everything. I don't think you'll ever know how glad I am that he has you."
Kanan went to answer him before he heard Hera's voice down the hallways call out for him. Kanan turned to look at the door, knowing that Hera was going to be coming in very soon.
"And, if I may offer some advice, Kanan," Ephraim started.
Kanan looked back at Ezra's father and shrugged. Getting advice from a dead person, there were worse things.
"Life is too short to keep your affections in," Ephraim told him, looking down with a small, sad frown on his face. "And one day, you're going to hate yourself that you kept them hidden. I know I did. I still do. Believe me, life is too short not to love or to hold it back."
Kanan stared at Ephraim, feeling a pit in his stomach. His brain suddenly thought of so many scenarios, ones where Ephraim missed how he may have been too busy to play with Ezra or tuck him in at night, or even just Ephraim believing that he didn't say "I love you" enough times to Ezra in their short eight years together.
Kanan nodded, letting Ephraim know that his advice was acknowledged. The man smiled. Both heard the steps coming towards the Jedi's bunk. Kanan knew that he would be gone before Hera would come in. Somehow, Kanan just knew.
"Ephraim," Kanan started.
The older man stared back at him.
"You have an amazing son. I'm proud to be his teacher." Kanan told him.
Ephraim smiled and nodded once before he was gone, and just before Kanan heard his door open. The Jedi turned to look at Hera, who stood in the doorway with a slightly confused expression on her face.
"Why didn't you answer me? We're about to land on Lothal." Hera asked him.
Kanan offered her a smile, though she could tell it was forced.
"Sorry. I got…busy." Kanan answered.
Hera raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms and Kanan knew that position well. She was trying to assess the situation. She stared at him for a couple of seconds before asking, "Jedi thing?"
"Kind of." Kanan answered.
Hera stared at him for a little longer. Kanan hated how she could almost see right through him when she really wanted to.
"Everything okay?" she asked softly.
Kanan nodded, smiling. This time, it was truthful. As…interesting as everything was, everything was fine.
"Yeah, I promise." Kanan answered her before moving past her out of the room. "We're almost on Lothal right."
Hera turned, her arms still crossed, Kanan walked down the hall a bit and turned to see that she was still standing at his doorway. He gave her a smile.
"Coming Captain?" Kanan teased her.
Hera rolled her eyes and shook her head afterwards before her arms fell and she walked to him. Karan gave her a smile and together the two walked to the bridge.