Hello, my name is Elinor Jones, also known as the state of Virginia.
I usually wouldn't do something like this. That's for Maryland. Or any other stuck-up asses like him. But the recent heat wave has trapped me inside, and my siblings are apparently writing tons of letters… so I decided to give it a go.
I'm one of the oldest states and part of the original thirteen. I have some rivalry with Delaware (that state just loves to undermine my importance in American history). I'm protective of my little sibling, West Virginia, and Maryland annoys me to no end. No. Freaking. End. Mexico is kind of annoying, too. I think you can guess why.
So… hello, to whoever will be writing to me. As you may know, us states aren't very involved with real countries, besides America. We keep to ourselves and try to keep our country running. Trust me, it's a constant chore. You really think that Dad does all the work? Pah! As if.
So yeah. I only know countries that have supported the United States in the past. Well, maybe not know them. I'm more… vaguely aware of their existence. The only one I know well is England, and trust me, after experiencing his breakdown at Yorktown, I have no respect for that crybaby anymore. Stupid tyrant. Sic simper, buddy.
Anyway.
Enough with the rambling. I'm looking forward to your letters. Anyone can send 'em in. I'd love to learn a little bit about the different countries around the world. Dad is way too biased in regards to some of 'em, so it's no use asking him. He'll just twist stories way out of proportion. Like the time he told me that Finland was a stuttering wimp. I mean, what? Finland beat Russia, for cryin' out loud!
Well, I hope some of the crap he says isn't true. We'll have to wait and see. ;) Now, let me learn a bit about the country personifications. Give me something to do in this damn heat! Oh, and the longer the letter, the better. Yes, states and cities can send letters as well. That does include Maryland.
But mark my words, if any neighboring states send me stupid letters, they'll find their houses covered in toilet paper.
As soon as this damn heat lets me go outside.