HEY GUYS SO I KNOW I SHUD BE WRKIN ON MY OTHER STUFF, BUT THIS WAS IN MY HEAD, SO I JUST WROTE IT! THX, LUVV YA'LL!
LUCY'S POV:
I tried to ignore that feeling in my gut. It started with anger and ended in sadness. It was the feeling known as jealousy. It wasn't like I didn't know why I felt it, no, I knew exactly why. It was because of a relationship; it was because of Natsu and Lisanna. They started dating almost a week ago. Things are pretty much the same between Natsu and I because I never confessed, in a way, I'm glad that I didn't because, look at those two! They're perfect together, and we are so... not. I should stop thinking these things because they hurt, because their not true. Natsu and I fit together like puzzle pieces, while he and Lisanna... they just look mismatched, out of their element, etc, etc.
Although not much has changed between me and Natsu, plenty has changed between me and Lisanna. For example, where as we were once close friends, I now have to lie to her and say I'm in love with Gray. Before, if Natsu were with me all day, she would be OK with it, jealous, but OK with it. Now, however, if he does that, she complains and says, "How come you're always with her?! I'm your girlfriend not Lucy! Plus she loves someone else not you, and you love me!" Those words killed me every time. It was a painful reminder of who he loved and who he didn't love. Me.
When I first joined Team Natsu, I had an itty bitty crush on Gray; I'll admit it. Slowly yet in a fast manner, Natsu stole my heart. Slowly, because he won me over with every little thing he did, even if he didn't do it on purpose; yet in a fast manner because I didn't realize I was falling for him until I was in love with him.
"Lushyyyy." I heard a voice call out to me.
I got out of bed, and went to see who was calling me, though I already knew who it was, I would have recognized that voice anywhere, not matter what.
"Lushhyyy," I heard Natsu call out in his sleep.
I smiled at his sleeping figure. He was so cute, yet so... hot. I studied him in his slumber as I brushed a strand of hair out of his face. He shivered under my touch and subconsciously shifted towards me.
His strong, chiseled jawline. The way his broad shoulders moved when he he did. The way his hair looked like it was spiky when really it was just soft and pink. The way... the way I loved him.
"Lushhhyyy." I shiver at the sound of his voice. He has no idea what he does to me, not even I knew. I just... when he called me Lushy, I don't know if it was the way he said it, or that he just said it. But it sent shivers down my spine, the spine, and I liked it. My eyes continued to study his face until they finally landed on his lips. Unconsciously, I felt myself lean in.
"no, no, no, no Lucy," I said, backing away from him and leaning against the wall, "i can't kiss Natsu, even if I do love him, I can't! He's Lisanna's boyfriend!"
a tear rolled down my cheek, and I caught it.
"enough is enough," I told myself, "he loves Lisanna not me, and I need to be happy for him."
I stood. "pancakes, Natsu's gonna be hungry when he wakes up.
Why can't Natsu love me? I thought. As more than a nakama, much more. Why can't he love me like I-
"morning Luce,"Natsu said, interrupting my thoughts.
"Natsu!" I yell at him. He scared me, so I had dropped all of the batter on the floor.
"sorry," he mumbles, looking like a puppy, and who doesn't love puppies?!
I sigh, but I say, "it's fine, just get a wet towel and clean it will you?i have to go to the store to get more batter. Don't make a mess, OK?" I threatened with a glare that put Erza's to shame.
"OK," a trembling Natsu replied.
"natsu! What have you done to my house?!"
I look around and see him standing in the kitchen covered in syrup, ketchup (ketchup? wtf?), eggs, and some pieces of bacon.
"oops?" he says, trembling.
"oops? oops? " I growl. "You know what?" I say smiling sweetly which just made Natsu tremble more, "it's OK, I will just wash you up."
"uh-oh."
I grab the water cord from the sink and spray him. Natsu laughs and complains while saying, "mercy! Mercy! It tickles, Luce! It tickles! Mercy!"
I laughed, but I was so caught up in my revenge I didn't see the wet mess on the floor.
I start walking towards Natsu, saying, "that's what you g-"
I'm cut off by my own shrieks as I fall down. I feel something warm press against me, and instinctively, I cling to it as I fall. With a pair of strong arms protecting my head, Natsu and I fall to the ground.
With our limbs wrapped around each other in a tangled mess, we stayed in that position for what seemed like forever. I could have stayed in Natsu's arms forever, but Natsu made the first sign to get up. As we got untangled, Natsu somehow fell again and his lips grazed my cheek. I gasped, because even if it had only been for 1 second, I missed the feel of his lips on my skin.
Natsu quickly regained his posture, but his hands were on either side of my head and his lips were just centimeters away from mine. It took all I had in me and so much more not to kiss him, not to pull him close to me, not to touch him.
"N-Natsu," I say, my voice hoarse from the effort of having him so close yet so far.
Suddenly, his lips are on mine, and his hand in my hair. His lips are so warm and soft. He tastes like... like... I don't know how to describe it, but its so good that it leaves me wanting more with every passing second. Natsu pulls me as close as possible, as I do the same thing to him. I grab at his hair, forcing him to stay close to me,but I think both of us would have stayed close anyways. Natsu nibbles on my bottom lip, catching me by surprise, which he uses to his advantage. He quickly inserts his tongue in my mouth exploring every inch of it. I think I moaned some where along the lines, but I know I heard a growl come out from his throat. He need for oxygen was becoming great, yet instead of pulling apart, I wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him closer.
Suddenly we hear what sounds like a broken sob. Reluctantly, yet some how quickly we pulled away. We stood so fast, that if it wasn't for the heat that was left on my lips, I would have thought it was all a dream.
I was so busy in my own thoughts (apparently Natsu was (I wonder what he's thinking about hint hint) too) that I completely forgot why we broke apart.
"h-how could you?"
my head snapped up. Oh crap. Shit. I'm horrible, so horrible.
"Lisanna-" I started
"how could you?" she says cutting me off, her voice full of anger and resentment.
"i-" I started
"you're supposed to be in love with Gray!" (Natsu's eyes widen so much I thought they were gonna fall out!)
"i tried! I tried so hard to fall in love with him because I didn't want to hurt you, but nothing worked. Neither Gray nor I feel that way about each other! I tried so hard to fall in love with him, to like him just a bit more than as nakama, but I couldn't! My heart already belonged to Natsu, and no matter what I did or what I tried that didn't change," I yell, tears staining my cheeks. Out of my peripheral vision, I see Natsu's eyes go wide, and a light smile play at his face.
"so what? You lied to me?!" Lisanna is pissed. No fucking shit sherlock, I think to myself, you kissed her fucking (hot) boyfriend.
"y-you lo-love m-me?" we both turn to look at Natsu. His bangs are covering his eyes, so I have no idea what could be going through his head.
"do you love her?"
".."
"do you love her?" Lisanna asked one more time.
"i never wanted to hurt you," Natsu says
"do you love her?" Lisanna asks, shaking, from fear of the answer or from the anger of finding us together, I don't know.
"yes," Natsu said quietly.
I gasped. H-he loves me? I thought to myself.
Lisanna's tears ran freely down her cheeks, and unlike before, she no longer tried to stop them. Instead she walked towards Natsu and slapped him- hard. She then turned towards me, and flinched.
She raised her hand and-
"no," Natsu said hoarsely, holding Lisanna's hand back.
"what?" Lisanna asked shocked.
"no, it's not Lucy's fault I love her and not you. I know I wasn't fair to either of you for lying to you and dating you when I didn't feel the same way, but I never meant to hurt you," Natsu says looking Lisanna straight in the eyes.
"Natsu..." Lisanna whispers hoarsely.
"I'm sorry," Natsu says, which is all either of us can offer.
Lisanna runs out the room so fast, that if it wasn't for the guilty feeling I still had in my chest I wouldn't have guessed she had even been there at all.
I fall. I fall to the floor and sob.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry! I tried, I really did, but I- I couldn't, I couldn't," I mummer while I cry my eyes out, "I'm sorry."
I feel a pair of strong arms wrap themselves around me, and I throw myself into them. "I'm sorry," I all I can get out of my mouth.
Gently, Natsu lifted my face. "I'm not."
"what?" I ask, surprised
"I'm not sorry for kissing you. Yes, I am sorry that I hurt Lisanna, but I'm not sorry for kissing you, that's something I could never be sorry for."
"i..." I was at a loss of words, so instead, I buried my head in his chest and whispered, "i love you. I love you so, so much."
Once again, Natsu gently tilted my head, and he leaned in for a kiss, but I pushed him away just before our lips met in yet another delicious kiss.
"we can't do this," I tell him as I stand up. "we're just going to hurt Lisanna more."
"no we already hurt her, this will help all of us, because we belong together, Luce, we always have," Natsu told me, with a determined glint in his eyes.
Instead of answering him, I let him kiss me. His lips were just as delicious as they were a few minutes (or was it hours) ago. I knew I would have to deal with a shit load of crap later, but for now, the feel of his lips on mine overpowered those thoughts.
OOK, SOO R&R/F&F? THX PPL! LUV YA'LL.