Section 1:
One day Eric, the asian barbarian was considering devouring the limbs of innocent infants. However, he found this to be too stereotypical and shot himself in the leg.
Afterwards, Eric married Mr. Pibb and stuck his tongue inside of his mouth. While their tongues wrestled and saliva dripped from their lips, Eric began caressing Mr. Pibb's buttocks. Suddenly Mr. Pibb's eyes fell out into Eric's nostril and Eric died of a stroke.
Courtney walked into the room about four days later for the sake of becoming the new main character. However, she was much too dumb and began ripping the flesh off of her arms. This amused her to the point of sinful lust and stabbed Tom Hanks thirty times everyday for three weeks. Ironically, she died of a stroke too, and let her dead corpse choose the new main character. This just so happened to be the world's most handsome and talented individual, Kevin.
Kevin walked to Ireland. This was where his name originated. After finding the cat who created the final Indiana Jones movie, and murdered him. That movie was by far the best out of the series, and Kevin was ticked off at the said cat for ruining his opinion of his old favorite, Temple of Doom. Indigo forty said too and Hawk do go no work in economy? Philosophy made Kake da kat hedded kookabura nunu doog oogie boogie lolol roflmao new car smells like a fork knock knock whose who's whos der spongebarb spongebarb who? spongebarb mc. ding dong mgee LOLOLLOLOLOLOLLOOOLLOPL)IKOKOKOJVIOHEUFYIUCEYFIUEIUf y
That is how Eric slayed the green dragon of Lakeinshire. It was a valient tale of action, romance, and most importantly, romance. New York congratualted him, for Eric had saved the life of Doorknob III and Second Mc. Cereal eyes spoons are not the future of America, the furture of the Land Before Time had too many movies are fun because they are like moving pictures are more fun to look at in color of your skin doesn't matter makes up all the objects on Earth is the planet we live on. Ruufuus Harwkpo Suukoo is Eric's real asian name gave to him by his asian ancestors who time traveled back to the age of the prehistoric age of the 20th century.
Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole SinkhoIe Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole Sinkhole
Bam boom bibbity bop said Larry. Eric ran Larry through with a pitchfork. I CHOOSE YOU SWINUB! SWINUB USED BOLT TACKLED! SWINUB FAINTED! SWINUB DECIDED TO CRAFT A LEGITIMATE CONTINUITY THEORY THROUGH ADVANCED LOGIC AND FUTURISTIC HARD DRIVES. Eric. Eric? Eric, where are you? Where did you go Eric? Please come back Eric! I miss you Eric! Eric. Eric. No.
No. Please no. No. No. Nu. Ni. Please. Please No. Eric. Eric no. Eric. Eric. Eric No. No. Please Eric. Please Eric No. No. Please. Please No. NO Eric Please No. GORK GORK GORK GORK
Eric was a man. Eric had chest hair. Eric had no chest hair. Eric had chest hair. He liked to lick his chest hair. The chest hair he didn't have. Hair is sexy. I like to noodle my boodly doodle ROFLMAO MOE MOE MOE MOE MOE Ten two ten two three Buke Baka Bakemonogatari Nisemonogatari - Eric's Favorite Anime No such thing as lack of silver no such thing no Do you believe in CINNAMON MON CINNAMON! SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII- I won't finish that. IIIIIIIIT. Darn it. I didn't say that cuss word, okay? Don't tell my auntie. If you tell her,
she'll deficate inside of your eye lids.
Alien vs Preditor vs Eric Eric will win because he is neither an alien or a preditor or an Eric. I am running out of ideas for this fan fiction so I'll just recite a poem I wrote in elementary school:
I am a brick,
my color is red,
I cannot be alive,
so therefore I'm not dead.
I'm part of a wall,
never thinking at all,
as spring turns to summer,
and summer to fall.
I never do much,
but I'm not complaining,
I am very sturdy,
and I'm still sustaining.
I am a brick,
and as I have said,
I cannot be alive,
so therefore I'm not dead.
THE FRIGGEN FRACKEN END ERIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIC ERIIIIIIIIIIIC ERICCCCCCC ERICCCCC DIED