I realized that I haven't really been updating... I've been really busy with schoolwork (end of the year exams coming up, you know...)

But that's no excuse. Well, it kind of is... a bit. But anyways, this is something I don't normally write. But hey, it was in my mind, and I decided to let it out :)

Basically it's Lily's thoughts after Snape calls her a Mudblood in front of the school. Yeah, I know I'd have been pissed. Maybe Lily was, maybe she wasn't. Frankly, I think she was sort of relieved to have it end.

I'm rambling. Please, read and review, or Fluffy will eat you!

Disclaimer: I realized that I haven't been putting one. But seriously, if I said I was JK, I'd be jk'ing you. Heh.

Should've Known

Deep shocks in life tend to resonate for a long time. They sound in one's heart and mind long after the initial incident has passed. They are never easy to get over, and one never forgets them.

Lily knew, down in the deepest parts of her mind, that Severus Snape could never remain her friend. They lived different lives; they had different friends and even though she had tried - oh yes, she had tried - to combine the two, it was sort of a relief to have the whole thing over with.

She'd never expected their friendship to end quite so abruptly and with such hatred on his part. Oh, she had a feeling that one day Severus would stop pairing up with her in Potions, or spend just a little bit longer each day with his Slytherin buddies - God, how she detested Macnair and Avery - or do something to signal that he no longer desired Lily's company. It was always he who ended the friendship in her mind, because Lily had the feeling that she was the one trying ever so hard lately just to keep them civil.

Mudblood. The word she had never even dreamed of hearing him use it on her. True, they'd had their spats, but in every instance Severus had never crossed that boundary, the one that showed he was just as cruel and prejudiced as the rest of the pro-pure wizards. Lily, who had always, always defended and protected him from Potter and Crew, who made sure she never teased or bullied him like the rest of their year, had been the receiver of his anger. Potter had been quick to lash out in Lily's defense - perhaps the idiot wasn't as self-absorbed as she thought - which probably served to strengthen the rift now evidently out in the open, but Lily knew she was past caring.

Truth be told, she was sick of it. Sick of trying to cover up Severus's illicit activities while on patrol, sick of defending him to her friends who, Lily saw now, had been right from the beginning. Things had been simpler in their younger years; the mutual hatred of Potter and Black (not so much Remus on Lily's part, who considered him a great study partner - probably the only study partner she had now) as well as the general confusion of fitting into life at Hogwarts kept everyone around them from ridiculing their friendship.

They'd been young. Unaware of outside opinions and influences, concerned only with each other. It was only in third year when Lily began to hear the rumors and whispers behind her back. That Severus had bewitched her - that he was only keeping her around for her brain and her body.

At the time the whispers had made Lily fiercely angry. How could they have thought that about her dear, kind, thoughtful Severus Snape? Now, however, she saw what the world had seen, all those years ago. The Slytherin that Severus was so careful to hide around her. The cruel, taunting young man who didn't care who he hurt.

It had been expected that their friendship would end. Lily had been a fool to think differently. She was Lily Evans, Gryffindor's brains and according to her friends one of the kindest, sweetest people in the school. He was Severus Snape, Slytherin Potions prodigy and someone who, up until yesterday, had been the truest friend Lily had ever had.

Drying her tears, the prefect left the privacy of her room and emerged into the Gryffindor common room, meeting her concerned friend's gazes with a steady smile. She should've known it was too good to be true.

Terminus

Good? Bad? I won't know unless you tell me!