With apologies to Dr. Seuss...
The Master was nasty, the Master was bad.
With his dark beard of evil, he's really quite mad.
He'd gotten quite bored with his open-faced rival.
Yes, this story takes place some time before Survival.
He kidnapped poor Santa, a cardinal sin.
He lured him in gently, with biscuits and gin.
His plans were generally chock full of flaws.
But this one was perfect, he'd trapped Santa Claus!
But the Master he really had not gotten insured.
'Gainst the entrance of a certain leader of Voord.
He'd previously been blown up, into bits really small.
He'd just been released, from Rolf's Monster Hospital.
But Yartek was groovy, Yartek was real cool,
He's also amphibious, which could come in useful.
He climbed up the dranipipe, despite feeling queasy.
With those flippers of his, it wasn't too easy.
He looked in the window, and all he could see.
Was the Master sat playing, with his TCE.
In an instant he made, an important decision.
He'd save poor old Santa, with complete precision.
He leapt through the window, smashing the glass.
He slipped and fell over, onto his arse.
He looked at the Master, he looked at the floor.
He looked at poor Santa, stapled to the door.
He quickly lashed out with his big size ten flipper.
He then fwapped the Master, with a smelly smoked kipper.
The Master took aim, with his black TCE.
But he missed our Voord hero, and instead hit the tree.
Yartek grabbed hold of that small Christmas tree.
And prompty inserted it, ooh, owww, arrgh, aieeee!
The Master he wibbled, he cried for his mum.
He ran up the stairs, with a tree up his bum.
Then Yartek gave chase, with his usual grace.
Tripped over his flippers and fell on his face.
They bundled right into, a familiar room.
With a six-sided console shaped like a mushroom.
A party in full swing, just barely begun.
With eight incarnations, all having some fun.
The first poked the Master with his long walking stick.
The second he chuckled and gave him a kick.
The third used aikido and gave him a chop.
The fourth used his scarf to tie him all up.
The fifth pulled his balls out, and threw them at him[1].
The sixth threw a mincepie, with vigour and vim.
The seventh he poked him with his big umbrella.
The eighth tripped him up, the cheeky young fella.
Seeing the Master had now been subdued.
Yartek ran down the stairs in a rather good mood.
He unstapled Santa, who gave a big grin.
And offered a swig, from his hipflask of gin.
The Doctors all rushed in, but nothing was amiss,
And they all cheered for Yartek, the Voord who saved Christmas.
[1] his big red shiny balls[2]...
[2] The ones he plays cricket with...