Master Dad

Chapter 1 - Happy Birthday

A month after Shake was released from the hospital, he was told by the doctor to take it easy with the stitches in his straw if he didn't want it to fall off and bleed out again. And that's when Shake begged Olivia to let him stay with her, hoping she would take better care of him than Frylock.

And even though it took a week of convincing, Shake eventually persuaded Olivia to let him stay with her, under the condition that he couldn't mooch off of her…much. Besides, she needed the money after what happened to Dwayne, and even though Frylock occasionally pays her to babysit Meatwad, it wasn't enough. So, Olivia took the job as employee at a Starbucks in the mall, which kept her and Shake on their feet for the most part.

But today, on the thirtieth of December, Olivia had to work even harder at home than she did at work.

"What is that?! What is that smell?! What ever it is, it smells-WHOA!" Shake called as he ran into the kitchen with excitement, but he was cut off when he slid on the wet and slippery tile floor.

"Careful, I just mopped in here," Olivia finally warned with a smirk, as she stirred homemade white frosting in a mixing bowl with a wooden spoon, and she was wearing a large white apron.

"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock. How come you ain't slippin' everywhere?" Shake groaned in pain, as he staggered to stand with a now aching pain in his back.

"Padded paws," Olivia simply replied while stomping one of her feet on the floor without slipping, "now, be a good house guest, and grab the milk for me, please?"

"Why? What are you doing? And for the last time, what is that heavenly smell?"

"It's a cake, and it's in the oven right now."

"Why are you making a cake?"

"Don't tell me you've forgotten your own birthday, Shake," Olivia stated with surprise as she turned to look at the said milkshake with a look of shock.

"Of course I wouldn't. I'm just saying, why would I need a cake—when I got a cherry-topped sundae right here? Rrrrrr!" Shake purred seductively while scanning over Olivia from top to bottom and biting his lip.

"How romantic are you?" Olivia sighed sarcastically while shaking her head, and she went to get the milk from the fridge herself and poured and mixed it into the mixing bowl.

"The most romantic man who ever lived. Now, what did you get me for my birthday, anyway?"

"You're turning forty one, Shake, you're too old for presents. Christmas is the only exception."

"Oh, really? How old are you, again?"

"I'm twenty nine. Why?"

"Are you too old for presents on YOUR birthday?"

"Yes."

"Bull crap! I'd buy ya somethin' special for your birthday! Tell me, what would you want?"

"Shake, what I want is something you can't afford."

"Then lend me some money, smartass!"

"Can't. Spent most of my free money of the ingredients to make your cake."

…

"You are difficult, ya know that?" Shake grumbled after a long pause.

"I know. Do you wanna lick the spoon?" Olivia asked with a smile as she offered the wooden spoon after scooping a mound of frosting.

"Yes, gimme!"

That night, Olivia cut a piece of Shake's birthday cake for Frylock and Meatwad and delivered it herself; even Carl got a piece, and they all gladly thanked her.

But when she came back home, she found Shake glaring at her when she walked through the frost door, as he stood next to his vanilla and white frosted cake, as nearly half of it was gone now on the kitchen table.

"Couldn't you have at least bought a separate sheet cake or somethin' for them? I'd like to FULLY enjoy MY homemade cake that my lover made for me," Shake complained.

"Well, birthdays are meant to be celebrated with friends, and since you didn't invite anyone over, I thought it'd be nice to at least let them have a little slice. And it's just cake, Shake, don't worry," Olivia protested while rolling her eyes, and she walked into the kitchen to grab two plastic plates and cut two more slices from the cake.

"I don't care, it's still bull shit!"

"Hey, do you wanna go ta bed with cake, or a mouthful of soap? 'Cause I'll shove a bar in your mouth if you don't clean up your language."

"I'd rather go ta bed with YOU. C'mon, you've been making me sleep on the couch the whole time, AND it's my birthday. If you really do love me, then can't you just give me the gift of birthday sex? Don't forget, it's free."

After the two slices were cut, Olivia sighed and looked directly into Shake's eyes for a few long and awkward moments.

"You think that just because you don't get laid every night that I don't love you?" Olivia asked in disbelief.

"Yes, that is my theory," Shake declared.

"That's not how relationships work, Shake. It's not just about the physical pleasure, it's also about the feelings in your heart…wherever it is or what it may look like."

"Well, feelings don't help me to copulate, now, do they?"

"They can if your heart's in the right place."

"I'm usually more concerned if my dick is in the right place, and last time I checked, that's between your legs, Oli."

"That's it! You're sleeping on the couch again!" Olivia snapped when he called her that name, and took her cake to her bedroom, and she didn't wait for Shake. But the said milkshake abandoned his own slice and rushed after her.

"Oh, come on, on my BIRTHDAY?!" Shake whined.

"Fine, you can sleep with me tonight, but NO sex."

"Got it."

A few moments later…

Shake didn't really keep his promise, for as soon as Olivia finished her cake, he somehow managed to seduce her. And not long after that, the two were laying under the covers, breathless as Olivia covered her naked body with the blankets.

"You don't ALWAYS cease to amaze me, Shake," Olivia complimented between breaths.

"And YOU never fail ta show me a good time. Oh, best birthday EVER," Shake sighed with satisfaction.

"Yeah, happy birthday, love. But one quick question."

"What's that?"

"You didn't wear protection, did you?"

"Nope."

"And you came inside, didn't you?"

"Yes. But don't worry, I know for a fact that it's probably NOT biologically possible for it ta work that way between us…right?"

Olivia only looked at him flatly and cocked an eyebrow.

"Yeah, you're probably right, but we don't have ta worry about that 'cause you're on the pill."

"As always," Olivia sigheed while turning away to go to sleep.

…

"Aww, seriously, no second round?" Shake whined like a child.

"No, and if you keep bugging me, you WILL sleep on the couch tonight."

The next morning, Shake was sitting on the living room couch and watching a recorded episode of Futurama, as Olivia had already left for work, leaving him home alone.

But it wasn't halfway through the episode that there was a knock at the door.

"Answer it yourself, I'm too lazy ta get it myself!" Shake called to whoever was at the door without even bothering to look away from the TV. And soon enough, the door opened to reveal Frylock.

"Hey, Shake!"

"Wazzup, Fryman?"

"Just came over ta wish you a happy birthday…'cause I kinda forgot to yesterday…so happy birthday, Shake."

"Yeah, Frylock, you should know that your mere 'happy birthday' is, and never will be, NOTHING compared to Olivia's gift ta me last night."

"I don't even wanna know."

"You sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. I'm leavin'. Goodbye, Shake," Frylock protested firmly, and he left without letting Shake get a chance to say anything else.

…

"Man, I'm totally like Bender; I'm such a prick, but the ladies just can't resist me," Shake told himself with pride.

"Shut up, baby, I know it!" Bender suddenly shouted in the episode.

I just couldn't wait. I was so excited, I had to start writing IMMEDIATELY.

Obviously, this story is going to be MUCH more interesting...at least in my opinion. Actually, I think I'll leave the thinking of this to you guys, ok? Just, please, don't be mean.

Until the next chapter, I'm TRikiD, bye-bye!