Inspired by anders - Problems

This past year has been particularly heart wrenching. I'm standing on my balcony cigarette on one hand and griping my phone with the other, reminiscing about what we did on days like today. It's a brisk Sunday morning and I'm looking out watching the city slowly wake up. I'm reminiscing about Sunday's that haven't happened in over a year. He always slept in, usually opting to wake up late in the morning or close to noon. It always gave me the chance to have some time to myself to think and appreciate my life.

Once he'd wake up, he would shuffle his sleepy butt to where I was. He would always stand behind me and wrap both of us up in the blanket he always had over his shoulders in the mornings. He'd hook his chin on my shoulder and embrace me.

"Daydreaming again?" He would say, voice still gravelly from sleep. I've always loved how he sounded after just having woken up.

"Appreciating." I would reply turning to face him. Running my fingers through his hair, I would kiss him on the forehead and he'd lean on my shoulder.

"I need coffee." Is what would follow.

I would always give him a small chuckle. Of course he did, I always prepared for that. He's not exactly a morning person like I am. I had coffee waiting along with a variety of bagels and a few different cream cheeses. I would even make eggs, bacon, and toast some bread. This was my way of appreciating him. Every Sunday I showed him how much I care because if there's anything I don't do is take someone for granted. I love this man with every fiber of my being.

Over a year since it's been calm and content. Over a year since he broke the news that he'd have to leave. Over a year that my patience has been tested over and over. Yet over a year that I still remain here in the apartment we called our home together and still wait. Wait because I promised him I would.

I am sitting at the table outside on our balcony. I figured we change things a little bit today since summer is fast approaching. It's nice and warm outside and perfect for us to have breakfast outside. I'm pouring him a glass or orange juice when he comes to the balcony looking sleep deprived and somber.

"Kacchan? Are you okay?" I asked. It's not really like him to look this exhausted. He always catches up on sleep on Sunday's. He always tends to feel better after working long hours.

When he looks up at me my stomach clenches.

"I'm afraid I have news, while it's good for me I don't know if you'll take it too well." He responds

"Okay..."

"The company wants me to travel around the US to test the equipment for touring artists. I'll be gone for a month."

I sighed.

"While I'm not particularly excited about us being apart for an entire month, I feel like this would be an opportunity lost for you if you didn't take it." I say

He looks relieved.

"I promise it won't feel like I'm away for that long. You'll get calls and text and FaceTime and the whole thing." He smiles

I chuckle shaking my head.

"Let's eat."

He was true to his promise. He called, texted, FaceTimed, and even sent me gifts with a postcard attached from every state they hit on the way. Even though I knew he was having fun I was looking forward to him coming already. I planned the evening perfectly. I was going to pick him up from the airport and make him dinner as soon as we got home.

On the evening before he was due to come home he called me and gave me even worse news.

"Umm... they want to extend the contract with the labels for the artists and since they really liked the equipment we provided, they want us to keep touring with them for the next year."

I sit in silence for a few minutes.

"Deku? Are you still there?"

I hear clicking on the other day. I'm sure he thinks it's his phone fucking up on his end. Finally I speak up.

"A whole year?" I say quietly disbelieving.

"I don't know what to do here. I love you and I want us to start our lives together. It's just that this is also my job. This is what I went to school for."

I know I can't ignore that and I can't ask too much of him either even though he is asking a lot from me.

"I can't tell you what to do with your future either, Kacchan."

I hear him sniffle on the other end and I'm trying to hold back my own tears. I don't want him to feel guilty for pursuing his dreams.

"Here's what I propose, it'll be difficult but it'll be worth it in the end. I would like to keep touring with them until the contract is up and we can try doing the whole long distance relationship thing... what do you say?"

In the end, I ended up agreeing.

Drip, drip

Every night he would check in, tell me he loves me, and that he can't wait to come home.

The weeks that followed were hard but I managed. The next ten months that followed however were the loneliest. I kept to my routine and life continued on.

Drip, drip, drip

Coming home from work every night was lonely. The apartment wasn't lit up. The tv wasn't on in the background. Instead of coming home to warmth, I was alone in the dark.

Drip, drip

Dragging my fingers through my hair, I finish smoking the rest of my cigarette and go back inside. I look down at my phone to see if I have any texts messages but no dice. To be honest, Kacchan hasn't checked in with me for the past three weeks. Figuring he was busy at work, I didn't bother him. At first I started to get worried but every single text I sent was received and read. I was hurt to say the least then I started overthinking figuring he wanted to break up. Fucking figures, wait a whole damn year just for us to end this relationship.

Drip, drip, drip

"Stupid fucking faucet" I mutter. I walk over to the kitchen to see if I can fix it. Maintenance was supposed to stop by two days ago to fix it but they never showed. I even mentioned on the request that they had permission to enter the apartment if I wasn't home but to knock first just in case.

Not having any luck with the faucet, I leave it alone. I walk over to the couch and lay down. Reaching for the remote I turn the tv on to see what's on when I hear the jingling of keys on the door. This complex maintenance is so incompetent. I don't even bother getting up.

"Well finally, took you guys forever to get here. Thanks for knocking too, I made that specifically clear on the request."

"I didn't realize I had to knock to come into my own apartment, Deku." Kacchan says

I slowly get up from where I'm laying down on the couch. Standing in front of me is Kacchan and all his luggage is by the door.

"You're home?" I say disbelieving and on the brink of tears

"I'm home." He smiles

I walk fast over to him and engulf him in a hug and he hugs me back. I know I'm hugging a little too hard but I don't care. He's finally home after believing that he didn't want to be with me anymore. We stand there a few minutes before finally letting each other go.

"I can't believe you're finally here." I give him a watery smile and he reaches up to wipe my tears.

He smiles at me and that's when I punch him in the arm.

"OW!"

"You fucking asshole!"

"What the shit? What was that for?" He asks confusion written all over his face.

"Three fucking weeks and not a single call, Kacchan!"

"I can explain, Deku. Just chill okay?" He says "The contract ended early. A lot of the artists were performing outside and there was a lot of bad weather. I was in and out of meetings and I barely had a spare moment to try to call. I'm sorry."

"So does that mean you're going to have to leave for another month to make up for that time?" I ask annoyed

"No no no, in fact, because my boss liked me so much he gave me a promotion. So I had back to back meetings and had to help the crew. I no longer need to travel. I get to tell the traveling crew where they need to go from now on... over phone and emails. Here. In an office." He grins

"So you're home for good?" I ask

"Yes, Deku. I'm home for good." He smiles