A/N: One day I was just so sick of Phyllis I just annoyed her and annoyed her until I came up with this story. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not, I reapeat, do not own Aimal Crossing or any of its in-game characters. I also do not own a bug net, but you didn't need to know that.
Phyllis, Your Time is Up
"Yes!" Isadora yelled gleefully as she finished the flourish on her 'a'. Her amazingly gooshey and so lovey-dovey it would make you sick letter to Gaston was finally finished. Isadora began a complicated series of jumps, turns, and leaps around her small home. She finished when her rather sour Plinkoid got fed up, grabbed her leg in the middle of a pirouette and threw her across the room so that she slammed into her harvest mirror.
"Plink plinkedy plinky plink plink-ish plinkedy HA!" and with that the gyroid began to shake back and forth violently in laughter. Isadora stood, brushed herself off, and stood towering menacingly above the gyroid with her arms crossed. Once the Plinkoid felt the shadow come over it, it instantly shut up.
"I don't know what you said," Isadora snarled, "but it was insulting and I know it. NO MORE INSULTS!" then she returned to her cheery self and skipped out the door. The Plinkoid was relieved until Isadora stuck her head back in the door. "And I am INDEED very coordinated!" she said fiercely. The gyroid let her leave without another single 'plink'.
Isadora skipped cheerily down to the post office, adding in a few chêne turns along the way. She flung the post office door open and to her surprise, instead of hearing the familiar welcome from Pelly, she heard someone clicking their tongue, annoyed. "Tch, a customer," someone muttered. "Wel...come."
"I'd like to send a letter," Isadora said hesitantly. She inched towards the counter, as if there was an evil mole waiting behind it to jump out at her and tell her off for resetting. However, there was no evil mole waiting to surprise her. Instead, a violet pelican popped up from behind the counter.
"Well then, give it here!" the pelican commanded. Isadora rolled her eyes, but handed over the letter anyway. She turned to leave, but then felt a thump on the back of her head. The evil violet pelican had chucked the letter at the back of Isadora's head. Isadora felt the anger rising in her. "I'm (not) sorry, but I can't mail that," she shot at Isadora.
"And I'd like to know why not!" Isadora spat back, planting her hands on her hips. The pelican seemed to be taken aback, but then and evil little smile appeared on her beak. She looked at her watch and waited a few seconds and then she responded.
"Because we're closed," she said. Isadora opened her mouth to respond, but then thought better of it. She hissed at the pelican, who stared, a bit disturbed at Isadora's impersonation of a rattlesnake. She turned on her heel and stomped heatedly out of the post office.
The next morning Isadora sat up in her harvest bed, stretched, yawned, rubbed her eyes, adjusted her hat, and hopped happily out of bed. She hummed a little tune to herself as she looked through her harvest bureau for her optical shirt she planned to wear that day and her amazingly gooshey and so lovey-dovey it would make you sick letter to Gaston she had stored there. As she kept her head buried in the drawer humming (which eventually turned into singing) her tune she heard a muffled noise from the room behind and her.
"Plinky plinky plink-eth! Har plink har plink plink-ish plink!" her gyroid chanted in a sing-song series of plinks. Isadora launched herself out of her drawer having located her letter and her shirt and once again stood forebodingly above her amused gyroid.
"I am very frustrated and displeased with you," she said, her voice rising, "and I am indeed a lovely singer!" and she marched out the door. Hoping she was out of ear-shot, the gyroid sighed to itself.
"Plink plink plinky plink-eth plink," it groaned. However, Isadora was not out of ear-shot and flung the door open once again to glower at her gyroid.
"And I am a very fine dancer!" she spat and slammed her door once again. The Plinkoid didn't bother to groan.
Outside, Isadora clutched her letter and cautiously crept her way to the post office. She somersaulted behind a tree and warily peeked out from behind its peach laden branches. On tip-toe she swiftly flung the door to the post office open and slammed it shut.
"Goodness me! Whatever was that noise?" a bewildered Pelly squawked from behind the front counter, turning her head every which way, searching for the source of the bang. Isadora let out a sigh of relief. The pelican behind the desk was not the very frightening and dreadful purple pelican she had encountered last night. On the contrary however, it was the very feeling and delightful pelican named Pelly, who usually ran the post-office.
"It was me, Pelly," Isadora called from the door, and made her way to the front counter so that she could talk to Pelly without yelling across the room. Pelly curved her beak into a sweet smile.
"How can I help you?" she inquired, tilting her head to one side.
"I would like to mail a letter, and I have a problem," Isadora answered handing her amazingly gooshey and so lovey-dovey it would make you sick love letter to Gaston over the counter.
"Whatever is the matter human Isadora?" Pelly questioned, placing the letter on the counter. Isadora explained her very frustrating and dastardly encounter with the purple pelican from the previous night, and Pelly's earlier smile turned into a grimace. She sighed when Isadora completed her tale and shook her feathered head sadly.
"I knew you'd run into her someday..." Pelly said more to herself than anyone, then turned her eyes to Isadora's face. "That purple pelican you ran into last night would have been my sister, Phyllis. We tried to teach her how to treat customers, but I suspect the whole time she went through training she had somehow managed to paint open eyes of glasses and nap during the explanation." Isadora blinked, dumbfounded.
"Why don't you run the store at night, Pelly?" Isadora asked. Pelly smiled.
"Do you expect me to sit behind a next and smile all of the time?"
"No..." Pelly winked at Isadora then said:
"Your letter should be delivered soon. Good afternoon human Isadora." Isadora sighed defeated and walked solemnly out of the post office. She had hoped to learn a weakness of Phyllis' of some sort. She reached out to thrust the door open, but she stopped when Pelly called her name once more. "Oh and Isadora, if you were wondering, my sister deeply dislikes bug nets." Isadora looked back at Pelly and smiled.
"Thank you very much, Pelly," Isadora said, and continued her way out the door and to her home.
She had heard what she wanted to hear.
Late that night, the door to the post office creaked open. Isadora slowly and menacingly stepped towards the front desk. A purple pelican with no respect towards her job or her customers didn't even bother to raise her eyes from her magazine full of "Valuable Futons and Dressers". "Tch...a customer," she muttered. "So what do you want?" she asked in an annoyed tone, contemplating a one of the valuable futons in her catalog.
"I want you to look up from your catalog," Isadora said, an evil smile of triumph spreading across her face. Phyllis sighed a little sigh of annoyance and closed her catalog. All she saw next was the shadowed face of the customer she had ticked off the day before with a bug net raised high over her head. "Phyllis, your time is up!" she cried and brought the bug net down over Phyllis's head. Isadora's smile grew wider as she hoisted the bug net up and flung it over her shoulder. She skipped out of the post office, humming merrily, with a maniacally squawking Phyllis trapped inside the bug net.
The next morning, Isadora walked into the post office hauling a colossal package behind her. "How can I help you?" Pelly asked, her eyes fixated on the package behind Isadora that seemed to be...squawking?
"Yes. Could I have a special delivery for...gah...this?" Isadora replied, and lifting the package, with much difficulty, onto the counter.
"Of course. Where would you like this to be sent to?" Pelly asked, persuading herself that the package couldn't have squawked.
"Timbuktu!" Isadora said, smiling. Pelly, being the non-cynical pelican that she was, smiled back.
"Thank you human Isadora. Have a nice day!" Pelly called as Isadora skipped out of the post office, a smile plastered on her face. Once outside Isadora pranced her way home, stopping every now and then to try a royal or two.
"YES! I have rid Frogtown of one of its nuisances!" she shrieked in triumph. "Now all I have to do is get rid of that pestering mole..."
Hope you guys liked it! I tried to make you guys laugh, tell me if I succeeded!