A/N: Disclaimer: It's been nine years, I think we've firmly established I don't own Doctor Who, however, I do own this lovely box of Belgian chocolate I'm holding :D

Sorry I totally went off of the radar, just finished my first well-proper novel innit, which will probably be on Kindle sometime in October/November so I'm super chuffed, so productive! :D Details at a later date for anyone who cares! :P

Okay so I'm not going to lie, this is the eighth (not including 22 Weeks) in a series so if you're new, you're probably going to be very lost...! :o

It goes: Destiny, Paroxysmic, The Debt, Mother's Nature, Echoes, 22 Weeks (oneshot), Time, Mind Games (short). All of which contain whump, TenRose and many babies.

Jackie returned from the parallel world with Tony in The Debt, claiming Pete had become crazy with his power and developed a hatred for aliens. Brax (Braxiatel) is the Doctor's brother, rediscovered in Echoes. Martha is about to drop Mickey's baby (they were married in Mother's Nature). In Time, Torchwood was destroyed by a crazy elusive master villain who calls himself Toby, who caused the Doctor to become chronically ill and forcing him to regenerate. Also in Time, the Doctor was victimised by Toby and made an outcast by the human race, forcing him into exile from Earth. Brax, Jack, Jackie (with Tony) Martha, Mickey, Gwen, Rhys (with Anwen) and Ianto all chose to go with him and Rose, living on the TARDIS together. Sarah Jane and Luke remain on Earth, opting to look after the planet as best they can without him.

In the previous, Mind Games:

With the Master's help, Rose enters the Doctor's head to try and save her husband's life, who has regenerated with two consciousnesses in his head. She must rely on her knowledge of him to piece the traits of the Doctor together from his memories, in order to give her Doctor enough strength to fight off his next body, who wants to kill his current mind so he might be allowed to live.

She searches the Doctor's memories, including his childhood, his previous bodies and the Time War for innocence; loneliness; fear; loyalty; curiosity; intelligence; benevolence; anarchy; courage; anger; mercy; and love, discovering truths about her husband that she never knew in the process. During this, the Doctor's current consciousness is weakening, and she is left about to be killed by his next body's consciousness, with only his hope left to find. She realises that she is the final piece of him, his hope, and sacrifices herself to save his life.

When the Doctor wakes up, he is unaware that the Master was ever there. He realises Rose is brain dead. When everyone turns up, the Doctor grieves for her death. But whilst in the infirmary, the Doctor hears her voice. He realises that Rose's consciousness is trapped inside his head.

Honest to Rassilon there is so much in this series I can't sum it up this quickly, so I've left out swathes of details so if something's not clear feel free to talk to me, or head back and read the previous! :D

Updates will most likely be slow as I'm about to go back to Uni and study Gods, Japanese, forensics and Chaucer. My life makes no sense :o

Chapter 1 - Oo Stick You

Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!

The Doctor jerked awake at the sound of the shrill alarm seemingly spearing itself right through his skull and directly into his auditory cortex. With his hearts racing he immediately scrabbled up to find the offending clock.

Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!

In a desperate one-handed dance he managed to find the bedside table, slamming his palm down in alternate places in order to stop the shrieking. He couldn't seem to find it, and unwillingly opened his eyes to have a look, only to realise he didn't actually have an alarm clock.

Good mornin'!

Rose, he realised begrudgingly. He collapsed back down into the bed, running his hands down his face. 'Can you not do that?' he asked her seriously, his eyes automatically closing again to fall back to sleep.

No! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!

'Rose!' he moaned.

Time to get up and get me back into my body! Beep! Beep!

'Just five more minutes…'

No! Get up, else I'll start singin' annoyin' pop songs in your head.

'You wouldn't.'

I so would.

'I don't believe you.'

Hi this is my friend Daphne, and I'm Celeste! Oo, stick you, your momma too, and your daddy! Oo, stick you, your momma too, and your daddy!

'Rose!'

Yo mama, yo daddy, yo greasy greasy grandmammy! You got a hole in your panty got a big behind like Frankenstein, going beep beep beep down Sesame Street!

'Rose!'

Toot toot toot wear army boots! In your ear with a can of beer! Up your butt with a coconut! You go girl! Ehhhh… oh!

'All right, I'm going, I'm going!' the Doctor insisted, pulling back the cover and forcing himself to his feet. The TARDIS lights raised for him as he automatically headed for the bathroom only half-conscious, moving to the toilet and about to drop his boxers when he suddenly stopped.

What?

'Can you not look?' he asked.

Why not? I've seen it about a million times y'know.

'I know, but this is invasion of privacy.'

I can't help it, I'm seeing through your eyes.

'I'll close my eyes then.'

You're gonna pee with your eyes closed?

'I'll point in the general direction, I'm sure gravity will do the rest.'

Come on, grow up.

He sighed, dropped his boxers and looked down.

'What did you do to me!?' he yelped.

What?

'It's…'

Bigger?

'Yes!'

It wasn't me.

'Yes, it was, you gave me the body template to regenerate from!'

Okay, so yeah it was me, sorry.

'What else did you do?' he wondered seriously, quickly pulling up his boxers again and moving to the mirror. His brand new old face stared back at him, currently looking quite stupefied. His skin was smoother than before, his eyes seemed to be bigger, and the chaotic mess of bedhair was only serving to exacerbate his unbelievably thick hair. He paused, for a moment just staring at his reflection.

What?

'My face isn't right.'

Looks like a face to me.

'My eyes are bigger.'

They're fine.

'I'm younger.'

That's okay.

'My hair is...' He paused, running his fingers through the unruly brown locks. 'My hair is huge. What do I do with it?'

Just leave it like that, yeah?

'Sure!' the Doctor began insincerely. 'I'm the Doctor, I'm a Time Lord from the planet Gallifrey in the constellation of Kasterborous. I'm the man who's going to save your lives and do you have any hair gel because you know what? This weather is giving me so much frizz!'

Rose laughed in his head. Use my dry shampoo with hairspray to set it.

'You've thought about this, haven't you?' the Doctor realised. 'You've been thinking about this for… how long?'

While you were sleepin'...

The Doctor frowned at that. 'Wait… You were awake when I was asleep?'

Um, yeah…? Is that bad?

'Err, not so much bad,' the Doctor told her, frowning slightly at his reflection, which frowned right back. 'Just odd.'

If this has never happened before how'd you know it's not meant to be like that?

'I don't,' the Doctor confessed. 'But you're conscious when I'm not. If your consciousness isn't connected to mine, where is it connected to?'

There was a loud, resounding silence in the Doctor's head. Thankfully it was broken by a sudden knocking on the door of the adjoining bedroom.

'Doctor! Are you awake? Martha wants to check you over!' Jack called.

'Give me ten minutes!' the Doctor called back.

Showered, shaved, dressed and deciding to deal with his new body later, the Doctor met Jack in the corridor, who took his arm immediately.

'Better hurry, don't want to annoy the heavily pregnant lady,' he said, leading the Time Lord down the corridor. 'How are you feeling?'

'Pretty good,' the Doctor said, and for the first time in a long while he wasn't lying. After becoming chronically ill his body had died, though he and Rose had been able to figure out a way in which he could regenerate into the same body. Unfortunately that had had cataclysmic repercussions for him in the form of having the minds of his two bodies fighting inside his head. Rose had taken it upon herself to wade through his most deepest and darkest memories, piecing him together to get him back. She had then sacrificed herself to complete him, resulting in the equally as cataclysmic repercussion of having her consciousness trapped inside his head. His brother Braxiatel had been in the library most of the afternoon trying to find a way they could get her back inside her now comatose body, but was yet to emerge.

Halfway down the corridor he suddenly heard a sudden happy cry of a little girl from close by. Leah, he realised.

'Wait,' the Doctor told Jack, pulling his arm away. 'I need to talk to Leah and Alex.'

'Are you telling them about Rose?'

'Yep,' the Doctor confirmed, heading for the door. He quickly noticed Jack was following him. 'What?'

'Oh, I've gotta see this explanation,' Jack replied, grinning.

The Doctor rolled his eyes, and headed in through the door where Leah and Alex were on the sofa, the credits of Peppa Pig rolling. They were fighting over the remote. Jackie was desperately trying to yell at them to stop, but it was having little to no effect as she was already quite busy with trying to stop Anwen, Gwena nd Rhys' daughter, and Kiana, the Doctor and Rose's adopted daughter, from throwing building bricks at each other.

The Doctor swooped in immediately, prising Leah and Alex apart.

'Stop fighting, alright?' he told them.

'But Alex won't gimme the remote!' Leah protested, barely registering her father. Alex however immediately stopped and just stared up at his dad, his big blue eyes shining. The Doctor smiled at him, dropping to one knee in front of them both.

Leah abruptly realised Alex had stopped fighting her, and instead turned to see the Doctor kneeling there. Immediately she shrieked in delight and grabbed onto him in a three-way hug with her brother. 'Daddy!'

'Hello,' the Doctor said, beaming at them both when he pulled away. 'Play nice, okay? I don't like it when people don't play nice.'

'Where have you been!?' Leah demanded to know, her little four-year-old hands on her hips in a perfect posture of her grandmother. 'You're s'posed to be responsible for us, mmkay?'

'Err, you've been asleep!' the Doctor pointed out indignantly. 'And I'm here now. But there's something I need to tell you both.'

'Did you s'plode the Tardis again?' Leah asked.

The Doctor's brow furrowed. 'No, there...'

'Is mummy mad at you again for s'ploding the Tardis?'

The Doctor glanced at Jack, who was struggling not to laugh. 'No...'

'Is the Tardis mad at you again for making her s'plode?'

'No, there's been a...'

'Is it the Judoon again? Are they mad at you?'

'No, Leah...'

'Is granny mad at you again?'

'Leah..!'

'Is everyone else mad at you again? Did you s'plode them?'

'Leah!' the Doctor yelped, hand on her arm. 'No one's mad at me again and nothing's exploded again! Look, you know me and mum were trying to fix me? Well it worked and I've regenerated, but there was a problem. Something happened, which has put mum's consciousness in my head and for now it's staying there.'

Leah frowned, experimentally poking her father's head and staring at him, scrutinising. 'Mummy?' she asked. 'Is she gonna come out?'

'We're figuring something out,' he assured her. 'But you can talk to her anytime you want. Just talk to her through me.'

Tell them I love them.

'Mum says she loves you both,' the Doctor continued, looking at each of them in turn. 'And I'm sorry for the mess we've been in recently.'

'That's okay!' Leah assured him, reaching up for another three-way hug with Alex. After a few moments the Doctor drew back, took hold of the remote and gave it to Alex.

'Alex's choice,' he told them as Alex fumbled to straighten the remote up.

'What!?' Leah yelped. 'That's mine!'

'You just watched Peppa Pig!' the Doctor told her seriously. 'It's Alex's turn.'

'But…'

'Share! Sharing is good! We like sharing!' the Doctor purposely enthused, waving his arms slightly to try and communicate his point.

Leah harrumphed, folding her arms and leaning back against the sofa as Alex began to flick through the channels with clumsy toddler thumbs. He continued to flick for a few moments, before looking at his older sister, putting it back onto Peppa Pig and returning the remote to her.

'Oh?' Leah asked, confused.

'Sharing s'good,' Alex said quietly. The rare verbal input from the toddler stunned everyone in the room, apart from Leah.

'But it's your turn,' Leah insisted, trying to give the remote back to him.

Alex just shook his head, refusing to take it.

'There's my offspring!' the Doctor enthused, ruffling their hair in tandem. Both of them patted their hair down indignantly. 'Now I need to go. Play nice.'

He got up, kissing them both before leaving the room into the corridor with Jack in tow. Jackie followed, her jaw agape and pointing in the vague direction of the two children.

'What?' the Doctor asked her.

'They just accepted that?' she asked seriously.

'What?'

'That Rose is in your 'ead?'

'A million weirder things have happened in this place,' Jack inputted from the side.

Jackie sighed a hefty sigh. 'Well, I s'pose. Are you all clear? Are you healthy, sweetheart?' she asked the Doctor.

'We're just heading to the infirmary to check his regeneration went okay,' Jack told her.

'Well you'd better hurry up,' Jackie told him. 'And bloody take care of yourself cos you're carryin' my Rose in there!'

Leave him alone, mum.

'Leave him alone, mum,' the Doctor repeated out loud.

Jackie blinked, looking at him in confusion before clocking that he was repeating what Rose was saying.

'Oh, this is too weird, even for you,' Jackie told him.

'Thanks...?' the Doctor wondered.

There was a loud yell from the TV room of an upset toddler, and without hesitation Jackie ran back in, yelling a menagerie of children's names in a trivial effort to get order.

'Maybe someone should help her,' Jack mused, watching her go.

The Doctor and Jack glanced at each other, sharing a small shrug.

Hey!

'Okay, okay,' the Doctor conceded to the voice in his head. 'Jack, find someone, I'll head to the Infirmary.'

They nodded at each other and turned to part ways, when suddenly the Doctor felt a tugging at his shirt. He looked down to see Leah standing there, looking up at him.

'Daddy.'

'Yeah?'

'Did you say you regenerated?'

'Yep,' he said, gazing at her.

'Did it hurt?'

The Doctor paused. Her oddly reflective brown eyes were gazing back at him, full of fear and anticipation.

Be honest.

He nodded at Rose's voice, and knelt down to his almost five-year-old daughter. 'Yes,' he told her. 'It always hurts.'

'I'm scared,' she admitted smally.

'Why are you scared?'

'Cos I'll have to regenerate and it'll hurt,' she muttered.

'Hey,' he said, hugging her and placing a kiss on her forehead. 'You're not going to regenerate for a very, very long time, because I'm not letting you get hurt.'

'But what if I do?'

'You won't.'

'But what if I do?'

For a moment he just gazed at her, pushing back her long brown hair over her shoulder. She was growing fast, around his waist now. Her little face was beginning to define itself; looking more and more like Rose everyday. Her little fingers were becoming longer, she was becoming harder to carry and her Gallifreyan genetic inheritance ensured her intelligence and social maturation was enough to keep him on his toes.

He was sure only yesterday she couldn't pronounce Christmas or ketchup.

'I forget how fast you're growing,' he admitted.

Me too.

'I'm one metre ten centimetres!' she told him proudly.

He smiled at that as he just thought for a moment, briefly flicking through his options. If she was to regenerate successfully, she would need all the training she could get now the Academies weren't around. His lifestyle had put her in more danger than he ever cared to admit. He couldn't keep trying to hide her. 'You're becoming really mature. I'll prepare you for regeneration,' he decided.

'When?'

'Once we've sorted out mum.'

She nodded. 'Okay!' she said brightly, hugged him, and left in a skip back into the TV room.

The Doctor sighed, standing up and looking at Jack.

'She's gotta learn,' Jack told him honestly.

'I kind of wish she didn't,' the Doctor confessed.

Jack rested a hand on his shoulder. 'How are you going to teach her about regeneration?'

'I'll make a regeneration simulator,' the Doctor said. 'A machine you can plug into and practise regenerating.'

Will it hurt?

'Will it hurt her?'

'It will only hurt if I program it to,' the Doctor said to answer both of them, sighing a little. 'Can't believe I'm going to teach my daughter how to die.'

'She needs it,' Jack assured him. 'You don't wanna be caught out. If she doesn't practice she might not even be able to regenerate.'

'I know,' the Doctor muttered.

Just in case.

He nodded again, and left to the infirmary.

'It just can't… you're not making sense!'

'I'm not?' the Doctor wondered, still pounding away on the running machine he'd been on for a solid five minutes now, sensors fixed to his chest monitoring his heart rates and blood pressure.

'Your heart rates are barely going up!' she told him, furiously checking the monitor.

The Doctor just grinned, still running. Jack was in the corner, smiling away as he gazed at the Time Lord.

'This isn't right,' Martha breathed, slipping through her clipboard papers and comparing her notes. 'Is this normal? For you to have this much stamina after regeneration?'

The Doctor, somehow, managed to shrug while he was still running. 'Might just be my residual cellular energy having a biological party before it settles down.'

'So it might not last?' Jack wondered.

Oh, you'd better get me back into my body, quick, yeah?

'Won't last that long,' the Doctor muttered to the voice in his head.

Jack laughed, only hearing the Doctor's reply. 'Rose just make a dirty joke?'

'Don't encourage her,' the Doctor said seriously.

'Hey, her words, not mine,' Jack protested, hands in the air.

'Can you three stop flirting?' Martha asked seriously. 'I'm trying work, here!'

Jack just laughed.

The Doctor had been delightfully surprised at the speed at which the others had accepted the concept that Rose's consciousness was stuck inside his head. Just a glance across the infirmary was the sight of Rose's body lying on a bed comatose, her body kept alive by a menagerie of machines until they were able to get her consciousness back inside her.

'So you're at the peak of your health now, and it's basically all downhill from here,' Jack summed up.

'Pretty much,' the Doctor agreed.

'You've been pretty ill, it's a nice change,' Jack told him.

'You're telling me,' the Doctor said, still running. 'Martha, can I get off now?'

'Oh, yes, sorry,' Martha said. The Doctor hopped off the machine with ease, peeling the pads off of his chest and giving them back to her before pulling his shirt back on and idly stretching his arms.

'So what's the diagnosis?' Jack asked.

'Well, he's got the body of an athlete,' Martha said, still checking through her notes.

The Doctor took one look at Jack. 'Don't.'

Jack sighed, disappointed, just as Brax entered the infirmary with a cheery wave.

'How are you doing?' Brax asked his brother, moving forward to check Martha's notes.

'Fit as a finkelgruber,' the Doctor informed him, jumping up and down on the spot.

'He's perfectly healthy. Almost too healthy,' Martha added as an afterthought.

Brax nodded, checking the notes before going to his brother and stopping him from jumping up and down with a hand on his shoulder. 'How's the post-regeneration?'

'Best one yet,' the Doctor told him.

'No abnormalities?'

'Apart from my wife talking inside my head?'

Brax pulled a face. 'Yes, apart from that.'

'Nope,' the Doctor concluded, stretching again. 'Did you find something to fix this?'

Brax pulled another face. 'We need to talk. Let's head to the living room.'

The Doctor looked at him, taking in his somewhat grim expression. The living room was fast becoming the place where lots of serious things were said and he didn't like it very much. 'Better idea,' he said. 'Kitchen. I'm hungry.'

You just ate before your nap! What's wrong?

'Energy deficit?' Brax asked, checking him again.

The Doctor pushed him away. 'Will you all stop worrying? I just prefer it if people break bad news over toast.'

A/N: The song is "Ooo Stick You" by Daphne and Celeste. Visit Youtube for 3 and half minutes of 90's pop pleasure :D