Disclaimer:  This is for my sister's friend, who wanted me (of all people) to do a Trowa and her fic…So I stupidly said sure, why not (but in my defence I think I did say it in a Dorothy like tone).  So here it is, a real person (debateable considering she is my sister's friend) – insertion fic!  AND I DO NOT EAT – I MEAN OWN Gundam Wing!

Dedicated to Maree

By: J.B. Santiago

         Trowa Barton was unhappy.  Of course you could never tell from just looking at him since he only had two types of facial expressions – the don't-give-a-damn- look and the surprised-but am-still-trying-not-to-give-a-damn- look.  Therefore you wouldn't be able to tell if he was unhappy but I digress.  Why was he unhappy?  Well if you had hair like his, that made you look like you only had one eye, then maybe you'd be unhappy too.  BUT that's not the reason for HIS unhappiness.  No, no, it was something else.  Trowa Barton was lonely.  Yes, that's right, the answer to the 53 million dollar question was – he was lonely.

Sure he had his sister Cathie.  Sure he had all the Gundam Pilots and Quatre (Not in the Yaoi way, I'm afraid since this is for Maree).  AND he had a whole heap of rabid fangirls just wanting to get their claws into him.  BUT he was still bloody lonely!!  Bloody idiot…If I had Quatre…hehe!  I'm digressing again! 

So ANYWAY, Trowa was lonely and he was sitting forlornly on his cute little ass, just giving his look (pick either one) when he heard an audible *pop* and a girl no older then eleven landed at his feet. 

She moaned and rubbed her head, shaking dust out of her short dark brown hair.  "What the hell?" She muttered.  She turned to look at her surroundings and when she saw Trowa her already big brown eyes, nearly fell out of their sockets. "AAAHHH!!!!"

Trowa gave her a look (guess which one) and spoke! "Stop that."

And the little short girl did.  They just stared at each other for what seemed like a few minutes before Maree yelled into the sky, "JB!  I'm eleven years old!!!!  I'm can't have evil thoughts about doing certain things to Trowa Barton!!"

From the sky: Oops! Your right!  My mistake! (hears a slap from above as sister hits JB) Hey! (more sounds of slapping) 

Maree tapping feet impatiently,  "Will you just change me into the legal age!"

From the sky: All right! Sheesh…(crappy magical music is played)…Turn Maree into legal age!

There is a bunch of d-grade movie special effects as Maree starts to grow.

Trowa watches all this with a new facial expression! (Ok…No, it's just one of the two)  The little girl with bad teeth has now grown into a tall girl with bigger, horrible teeth. 

Trowa:…Uhh…

Maree:  Damnsh its JBsh!  Fixsh my shteeth!! (has trouble speaking with big, horrible teeth)

From the Sky: You know I don't have to listen to you! (a slap is heard)  Alright! Sheesh…This is so unfair!!

More crappy special effects is heard and Maree's teeth have turned into perfect, straight, shiny teeth.

Maree:  Yeah!  Now come here Trowa-baby!

Trowa:… (Decides this would be the best time to run away from scary, growing, teeth changing girl).

Maree:  JB!!  Will you just give him to me!  (Huffs and puffs and tries to blow down a house.)

JB: Don't be stupid Maree, without your horrible teeth your breath ain't that bad! (sister hits JB again)…JB: (whimpers) This is so unfair!  I didn't deserve a crazy-loony-weird sister who hits like a guy! (slap!)

From the Sky:  (A gigantic hand appears and grabs Trowa by the legs, dangling him about dangerously.)

Maree:  Don't hurt him! I want him in one piece! (starts shaking fist at the sky)

From the Sky: OK THAT'S IT!  I'M NOT TAKING ANYMORE OF THIS CRAP! (Pulls Trowa up to the sky and places him on a cloud.)  I HAVE SUCESSFULLY PLACED MY SISTER IN A MENTAL BIN AND NOW I'M GOING TO SQUISH YOU MAREE!!!  (insert thunderous evil laughter here)

Maree: (gulps)…uhh…eep! (starts to run)

From the sky: DO YOU THINK YOU CAN RUN AWAY FROM ME!?!?! (more evil laughter) I'LL SQUISH YOU!!!! (gigantic hand presses down on Maree's head, grounding to the …uh…ground) BUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Trowa:…Uhh…What are you going to do to me?

From the sky: Oh, you!  I forgot I was so still in the moment of squishing Maree…WHAT am I going to do with you? (gigantic hand taps on a another cloud)  How about I put you down, and never put you through this sort of inane ness, IF you do me a favour.

Trowa: (gives look then shrugs) ok.  What do you want me to do?

From the sky:  Give me Quatre's number.

Trowa: (shrugs again) ok.  (somewhere in this universe, a certain blond has a feeling of impending doom).

From the sky: Yeah! (gets a number – No, I'm not telling you what it is! And places Trowa back on the ground.)

Everything goes back to normal.  Squished Maree is cleaned away with an eraser.  Trowa sits back on his cute little butt thinking, 'I'm never, having thoughts about being lonely again.  I think I'll go visit Quatre or Heero or Relena – hell – I think I'll even see Dorothy!'

With that Trowa goes off on a sexcapade!  I mean EScapade!!!

*************

Person who is going to fail their Politics exam because she keeps writing fics:

See, Maree!  I wrote you a nice happy Trowa and you fic…………….…Well I'm happy, and Trowa seems happy… (Quatre: I'm not happy!  I have a psycho fanfic writer – *gets gagged with a sock* JB: hehe…anyway)

I'm expecting people to flame me!! Or R&R AND C&C either is good!