Title: My Father's Daughter
Author: FauxFoxx
Beta: Avalion773
Rating: T
Summery: The Earth is a frightening place for an newly fallen angel.
Characters: OC, Castiel, Malachi, Bartholomew,
Genre: General
Warnings: mention of suicidal thoughts, Spoilers for end of season 8.
Disclaimer: I so don't own anything.
Prologue
Ambriel had a blessed life. Quite literally. A lesser angel, she was under the tutelage of Joshua and enjoyed absorbing his wisdom. Though she had never met God before she never questioned His existence. The radiance that shone down on the Garden was all the proof she ever needed. She basked in His glow and never wanted for anything.
Her sphere of influence had little to do with humans, save for the fact that humans depended on plant life. She was grateful not having to interact with man more directly. The prayers of corn were so much easier to handle.
She had heard the whispered rumors of Lucifer's plans to return, but thought little of it. It was a common rumor, one not worth getting worried about. She tried to ignore her more excitable kinfolk. When she heard Lucifer had managed to escape after all, she had no idea what to feel. She never really thought this day would come. It was only a matter of time before there would be a call to arms and all Heaven's forces would marshal to repel Hell's assault. Every angel would rise to fight whether they were soldiers or not. She was no warrior and likely would never survive an encounter with the enemy, but she wouldn't refuse to fight either. To refuse Heaven's Call was grounds for Expulsion or even Damnation.
Michael and Lucifer both circled their vessels and Ambriel prepared for what she knew would be her destruction, when suddenly the problem resolved itself. Michael and Lucifer had somehow both gotten trapped and the Apocalypse was adverted. Ambriel was staggered by the force of her own relief.
She never really knew Lucifer, she was young as far as angles were concerned, but Michael had been a kind big brother. Ambriel would miss him.
Michael meant far more than she realized. She may have missed him as a big brother, but in the absence of God, he had kept things together in Heaven. Without him to guide them, the other angels were scared and confused. Aimless. Raphael did what he could to restore order, but he was not Michael. Raphael believed that to restore order the angels needed a common goal. A common enemy. He wanted to restart the Apocalypse, to fulfill God's prophesy. The thought terrified her, but she could not bring herself to draw arms against her brethren like others were. She retreated to the peace of the Garden more and more often to escape the chaos Heaven was devolving into.
Hiding so often did not made her unaware of the massacres that happened, the civil war that broke out, the angel who dared rise above all others to declare himself the new God and how he was consumed by the power he absorbed.
She had no warning of what was to come next, but to be fair, all but a handful knew. All the angels were forcefully Expelled from Heaven. All but the one who cast the spell.
Chapter One: The Fall
Screaming. Burning. Falling!
She was eroding. The edges of her being ripped, sanded away. She was being Expelled from Heaven, but could she survive the fall to Earth? More of her tore off, wings shredded and scorched.
Being Expelled wasn't like falling from a great height. When an object falls, it speeds to the ground only so fast. When it reaches that speed it stays constant until it hits the ground. Being Expelled was more like a hand grabbing at her center and pulling her down. Faster and faster. Heat generated around her just from contact with the air and soon she ignited from it. Still she fell. Faster.
All too soon all that was left of her was the glowing heart of her grace and even that was dimming and stuttering. She would never survive the impact when it came.
The locals called it a micro-burst. Some sudden force that flattened trees and tore up land in a very small, concentrated area. Unusual for that time of year, but the weather had been really crazy the last few years. A micro-burst in the middle of nowhere was less interesting than the unexpected meteor shower appearing in the night sky.
Ambriel came back to herself slowly days later. She drifted for weeks after that, a patch of dimly glowing fog fading at the edges. Her grace had been depleted so far, she considered giving up and fading away completely. So many others had. The comfortable hum of her brothers and sisters in the back of her mind was nearly gone. So many had died during the Expulsion. Others cried in agony and mourning. This was the closest to alone she had been in her whole life. Alone in her mind and alone on Earth.
Her body, despite being non-corporeal, was wracked with pain. Her grace dimmed so far that even the light of the moon could obscure it. She paid little to no attention to the world around her, so consumed was she with her own situation, until a wracking sob issued from the brush beside her. Drawn to the sound of a pain so like her own Ambriel drifted toward it.
A woman crouched beneath a tree pushing dirt over a tiny grave at its base.
There was something about this woman. Some aura that drew Ambriel to her like moths are drawn to light. Ambriel had never taken a vessel before, let alone a True Vessel, but she knew the cherubs had worked to keep all angelic bloodlines alive. Perhaps this woman was the reason she had fallen to Earth here of all places. Perhaps she was unknowingly drawn to her as Ambriel had drifted aimlessly.
Ambriel drifted closer to touch the woman's thoughts.
...Sarah had suffered so many tragedies these last few months. One death right after another, one loss after another, and she just couldn't cope any longer. Finding her beloved cat had died during the night was the last straw. She couldn't take it any longer. She just wanted the hurt to stop. She was so tired. She wanted to fall unconscious and never stir from the darkness again. She had nearly half a bottle of Vicoden left. Maybe that would be enough. Maybe tonight she would just not wake up again. There was no reason to anymore. No one to miss her, no one to care for or about. No one left. Nothing...
Ambriel drew back quickly from the maelstrom of crushing depression that was eating the woman alive. She wanted to help, the woman's suffering momentarily distracting her from her own.
An angel needs permission to be allowed into a vessel, but not all vessels could withstand the raw power that made up the angelic beings. Even diminished as she was, she feared her visage would damage the frail human. She had no power left to manifest anyway. So she tried a gentle hum, the softest and gentlest noise she could generate. She tried to produce a white light and slight warmth, but she thought her efforts were in vain. She did what she could to comfort the woman.
Sarah's soul churning cries calmed slowly. She still wept, but the hard jagged emotions softened enough for her to catch her breath. A weak shaft of sunlight managed to break the dense canopy and the soft call of birdsong hummed in the air.
Ambriel sighed as the woman's broken sobs slowed. When she also showed no sign that Ambriel's voice harmed her, she attempted words.
"...rah..."
Still wrapped in her own misery, the woman took no notice of the call.
"...sarah..." Ambriel tried harder but her grace fluttered in reaction to the drain of power it took.
Sarah's tears paused for a moment as she tried to decide if she had heard a voice or if it was just an echo of herself.
"...Sarah..." It was clearly a voice, and it was calling to her.
"Who... who's there?" her voice cracked and wobbled. She had thought she was alone. Had someone witnessed her grief? Was she to be humiliated on top of everything else?
"Do not fear child. I am here. You are not alone." The voice was so much quieter, but now that Sarah was listening for it, she could still make out the words.
"Who are you?" Sarah looked around at the surrounding trees. She saw no person there but the voice was so quiet they had to be close or she never would have heard it.
"My name is Ambriel. I am an Angel of the Lord. Your sorrow called to me. What can I do to help?" Ambriel struggled to get the sentences out as her grace guttered dangerously low.
"Can you fix it? Can you bring them all back?" Sarah whispered to the grave at the base of the tree.
The gentle comfort that had started to surround her tinged with sadness. "I am weakened by being on Earth, but I'm afraid that was never one of my abilities. I'm sorry."
Sarah visibly crumbled. "Can you make it stop hurting then?"
"I can but you need to understand what that means. I can heal you from within and shield you from your pain, but I must be allowed in." Ambriel barely got the words out. She was nearing the end of her strength. If Sarah didn't let her in, Ambriel would fade away whether she chose to or not.
"What does that mean?"
"I have no physical body on Earth. If you grant me permission then I would gain the ability to use yours."
"You would shield me?"
"Yes"
"Okay then, yes."
Ambriel gathered what was left of her worn body and flowed as gently into Sarah's eyes and mouth as she could. Ambriel pulsed as much comfort into her vessel as she could generate to protect her from her own raw emotions, then settled to heal herself. She basked in the glow of Sarah's soul, so like the radiance of the Heaven she had known.
Ambriel blinked her new eyes. Cold mulch pressed against her face and the smell of autumn's decay surrounded her. It took her a few moments to realize that she was laying on the forest floor. She stayed there, eyes focusing on a bit of rock inches from her nose. She knows all about it, the flakes of mica pressed from the shells of ancient sea creatures, the feldspar created in the heat of the earth's core, the minerals that color the quartz flecks throughout. But now she can see so much more. The early morning light flecked off the iridescent specks and threw rainbows of light back to the world around it. The simple minerals turned the cold gray feldspar into warmer tones that complemented the quartz. It was stunningly beautiful. She loved her Father, but she had never understood how much of an artist He truly was.
She reverently reached out and picked up the simple stone. As cold as the air around her was, the small rock had been lying in sunlight and absorbed the heat of the day. She lifted her head to face the dawning day, eyes closed against the light, bits of dead leaves falling from her hair, and a bit of stone clutched to her like a holy relic.
Ambriel had never had a corporeal body before and standing took a little more concentration. Pushing herself off from the tree she took her first steps into the world around her.
A/N Ok guys, this fic has been sitting in my folder for way too long. I love this character, but I don't know where to go with her next. This was something I wished the show had focused a little bit more on, lost and confused angels on Earth with no immediate purpose. What do you guys think should happen next? What does a being who has never been human before do? Give me your thoughts and opinions and I'll see what plot shakes loose.
A/N x2 Also this fic touched on the subject of depression and suicidal thoughts. I just want to say, you gentle reader are a special and wonderful person. If any of you are plagued by such dark thoughts, we are all here for you. There is no shame in finding help. You are a beautiful soul and if nothing else, your SPN Family is here for you. #DepressionLies #AlwaysKeepFighting.