A/N: This is my first Percy Jackson fic ever! Just two chapters, at most. Warning: I haven't read the books in a long time. Note that this is after the Last Olympian but before the Lost Hero.
Deesclaimer (she says in a bad accent): I'm not Rick Riordan or Jane Austen.
"With great power… Comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later." –Rick Riordan, I forget which book
Naps, Swords, and… Petticoats?
Percy Jackson looked at the small group of kids and teens surrounding him. They were, in some way or another, related. Like twenty-sixth sister, ten times removed. This was the Poseidon cabin.
"Okay, is everyone here?" he asked, counting silently in his head, "Hey, where's Emil?"
A small girl raised her hand, blushing furiously.
"Yes, Monica?"
"He's being… Orientated in the bathroom right now. The Ares cabin took him from us. I couldn't do anything, I swear!" she said.
"I'm sure he'll do fine on his own," Percy promised her, "Meanwhile, I'm going to tell you about the mission we are going on." He pulled out a diagram of something that seemed complicated and annoyingly hard to fix. "This is a time machine that was invented by Chronos cabin."
The cabin grumbled a bit. Wounds from the war earlier that year had healed, but loathing towards the children of the titans had not.
One teenage boy spoke up, "How do we know it's gonna work?"
"We don't. And that's the fun of it!"
Another mumble of disapproval rippled through the cabin.
"Come on, guys. Anyways, we need to help some half-bloods from the past. Otherwise, bad things will happen for us in the future."
"What?" cried Emil, who had just walked in.
"Dude, shut up so we can listen."
"… Continuing on, please. Their names are Elizabeth Bennet and Fitzwilliam Darcy. They are children of Poseidon and Athena, respectively, and if we don't stop them from destroying each other, bad things will happen."
The cabin was silent, waiting for more.
"In order for this to work, the Hephaestus cabin must make a time machine for everyone. Please be patient, as the process could take several days."
More grumbling.
"When we get the time machines, you must put them under your pillow and fall asleep. We will be in a sort of coma that allows us to pass through multiple dimensions into Hertfordshire, England."
"I thought you had to travel at the speed of light to time travel," a boy piped up.
"Your mind and your subconscious body will be… It's kinda hard to explain," said Percy, "I also have some packets to explain the etiquette of the era."
He passed the packets out. "That's it, I think…"
(Dude, the Break Line is Malfunctioning)
Two days later, the Hephaestus cabin had finished with the construction of the time machines, and the Poseidon cabin was ready to go for a very long nap. Percy had some last-minute adjustments to make, however.
"We're going to wear these clothes to bed," he said, holding up a dress for the girls and breeches, lawn shirt, cravat, and coats for the boys.
"Is this some sort of joke?" asked Greg.
"Not at all," replied Percy.
"Then why do we have to wear these clothes? I'm perfectly happy with my t-shirt and jeans, thank you very much."
"It's the style of the time." Percy held out a book that had obviously been used for school, as it was doodled in on almost every page, "See? The guys wore this-" he jabbed a finger at a man standing next to a piano, "-and the girls wore this," he said, pointing to a lady at the piano with a flowing dress.
"That's stupid," said Greg.
"Unless you want to be left behind on your first mission, I suggest you get into the clothes right now. We're leaving as soon as you all have the clothes on."
There was a scramble for petticoats and waistcoats, slippers and boots, as the Poseidon cabin dressed up like they were in a period drama.
"Everyone ready?" asked Percy, "Time for some sleep, everyone."
(The Break Line is Sleep-Deprived)
The road between Longbourn and Netherfield, Hertfordshire
"Whoah," gasped Casey, looking around from the dusty road to the fields to the trees.
A second later, a small pop was heard and Monica appeared, rather disheveled looking in her blue dress.
"Where are we?" asked Monica.
"Like Percy said," replied Casey, "Hertfordshire, England."
Many more pops were heard as the rest of the cabin arrived.
"Dude!"
"What the-"
"This is only slightly creepy? Maybe?"
"I want a sandwich."
"Can everyone be quiet?" Percy said over all the noise, "Here's the game plan: Elizabeth's sister is ill and at the place where Mr. Darcy is staying. Elizabeth is walking to Netherfield at this very moment. We are the cousins of Mr. Bingley (the host) on holiday in Hertfordshire. If you ever want to act, now is the moment to shine. We need to talk to each separately and tell them the virtues of the other."
"Mr. Bingley and Elizabeth?"
"No, Mr. Darcy, and as you are now to address her, Miss Elizabeth. You are not to call anyone by his or her first name only, even Mr. Bingley. You may call him Cousin Charles. We must beat Miss Elizabeth to Netherfield, so walk quickly."
(The Break Line has a Lunch Break)
Thankfully, the group arrived at Netherfield and was able to settle into their rooms. It was decided that the girls should try to talk to Miss Elizabeth first, after dinner.
"Miss Elizabeth?" said Monica, looking as innocent as an angel, "Might you tell us what you are reading? It looks dreadfully interesting."
"Oh, it is simply a volume of Shakespeare," said Elizabeth, "And please, call me Lizzy."
"Yes, Lizzy. I enjoy Shakespeare, too, although I've never read it myself. My mama read it to me." This was a blatant lie. Monica, although not the daughter of Athena, had read many of the classics and was a huge Shakespeare fan.
"That is lovely. Do you have a favorite quote?" asked Lizzy, almost astonished at the knowledge of this little girl.
"I think mine would have to be 'The course of true love never did run smooth.'"
"So you prefer the comedies, then?"
"Yes, for I dearly love to laugh," said Monica, not knowing the great connection between herself and the woman.
"So do I," said Lizzy.
"Do you enjoy his sonnets, Lizzy?" asked another girl.
"I am not altogether fond of poetry unless the couple are very in love. Otherwise, one good sonnet could make it disappear completely!" replied Lizzy.
"Have you ever received poetry from anyone?" asked Mary.
Lizzy blushed slightly, and replied in the negative.
Making a rather bold move, Mary responded, "I imagine that Mr. Darcy would like to write you a sonnet or two."
"Why would you think of such a thing? I dislike him, and he dislikes me. I assure you, the feeling is mutual."
"But Mr. Darcy does not seem to be one to hate others. He is so good to Cousin Charles!"
"He seems very proud and disagreeable to me," said Lizzy, "Anyhow, I am determined to dislike him. He slighted me even when I had not been formally introduced! At a dance, no less!"
"Do you think he could have been uncomfortable?" asked the shy Leia, "I am often uncomfortable with people I have never met before."
"Yes, but you have not had time to learn how to interact with others. Mr. Darcy has had all his life."
"I still think he's shy," said Mary, "And with a friend like Cousin Charles, how could he be that mean?"
Lizzy would ponder this the rest of the evening.
(The Break Line is getting a Tan On the Beach)
A/N: My creative muse is tired for the day and wants to join the break line on the beach. Next up (hopefully in the next couple of days): the conversation with Mr. Darcy.
This is kind of a Percy Jackson-ish version of Hermione Interferes… Completely different time in the storyline and everything, but the basic plot is the same: Matchmaking 101.
Oh, and don't forget to review!