A/N: A new Tiva One-Shot. I hope you all like it. Please, R&R. Thanks. Ohoh, I am doing it in Ziva's POV, so NO- Contractions.

It was hard on me, it still is hard on me. My heart will not hold much more. I do not know why people have to keep on hurting me. I guess they just do. All of my life, I have felt like I have been held down. And I really was held down in Africa. They hurt me most of all. I thought I had been through worse, but now I know better. I have never had anything happen to me like what happend to me there. They beat me. Where I thought I would have never been beat. And I still have the scars and bruises to prove it. They still hurt. I still hurt. Most of the time, I think Tony still hurts.

I hurt him, too. I hurt him the most. I caused him all of his pain, but he would deny it all. He would say that he caused me all of my pain, but I caused that myself. You could also blame my father, though. I not only hurt Tony in a sense of emotionally, but physically as well. He came to Africa after me, and I could not believe it when I saw his face in front of me. He was stapped to a chair and I wanted nothing more in the world, but for him to tell Salim everything that he knew, so he would not have to hurt anymore; because of me.

I thought that if I was dead, it would make Tony feel a lot better, but I guess I was wrong. He told me there that he could not live without me. What I had been thinking was all wrong, all that time. I thought I had been left alone. I realize that after what all I did, I still had people who cared about me. And they were the people that had not even known me but for four years. My father had known me my whole life, but he did not care enough to come and find me when he did not hear back from me. Tony did. He fought for me, and for that, I am thankful.

And he forgave me. Now I know that he will always forgive me, no matter what. After I left him, after I caused him to get captured and caused him to hurt, after I caused him to kill Michael and regreat it, he still forgave me. I cannot believe how good he is to me. I do not deserve anything. Not from him, not from anyone. I am not good enough for anyone. Gibbs knows that. I can tell by looking at him that he does not trust me anymore.

That is another thought that keeps running through my mind. Tony trusted me. He may have been mad at the time, but he did trust me. Again, I am thankful for that. He always knows he can trust me. While the others did not believe the word I said, Tony did. He knew that I was innocent. And he had been the one to keep on wanting to come and rescue me from Africa. Vance and Gibbs acted as if they did not care, but Tony cared enough to atleast look for me. He actually wanted to look for me. He risked his life to save me. I did not deserve it.

I have never deserved anything good that I have recieved in my life and the bad things in life, I deserved. Tony said not. That is one thing I do not believe him about. I know the things I have done in my life are wrong, and I would give anything to take them all back, but I cannot. Tony said that I do not need to take everything back, because then him and I will not have met. I still wish I could take it back, but still have met Tony. That does not mean that my brother Ari would have been good. He would have still been back to try and kill Gibbs and I would have stayed to save Gibbs life.

I would still have stayed to save Tony's life. He deserves a lot more than he thinks he does. He thinks just because his father beat him that he done something wrong, he did nothing wrong. I think he has been perfect all his life. I would not admitt that, though. Not for a while anyway. I try to give him a lot. He knows that I do. He also thinks that I should not be doing things for him, after what I went through. I still done it, and I still do.

I am sitting in the family room, just staring at a picture of Tony and I. We are so cute together and we both know it. I do not know if he feels sorry for me, or he really loves me, but he has been staying with me since I got back. He even told me that he would not let me stay at the Navy Lodge. He made me stay at his place, even after I went out and found an apartment.

Tony walked in the family room. I smiled up at him. I watched as he sat down beside me. I could not help but feel as if I am as safe as I have ever been. Whenever he is around, we usually never talk. Being with each other is all we need. I am not the only one who thinks it, I know Tony does too. He makes me feel like I do not ever have to talk. He knows that lately I really do not feel like talking, so he does not make me.

I look over at him and see that he is already staring at me. I like it when he does that. We smile at each other. "Tony..." I said, quitely. He shook his head and took my hand. "I told you everything and you still forgive me. Why?" I ask.

"You know exactly why, Ziva." I do not know why were speaking quitely, but I really like when we do. I feel like there is not where in the world that people are fighting, and everyone loves each other. "You know that I love you."

"And I love you too, but you can still be mad at the people you love." I said. He understand this, I know. I hope he never gets mad at me, but I know that people are always going to fight. Waite, I do not know if Tony and I will ever fight again. "And you still trusted me."

"Ziva, I can't get mad at you. There is just no way. I can't lose you, Ziva. Not again." Tony said. His voice barely a wisper. I cannot believe the words I am hearing would ever fall from his mouth, but they are. And I am glad.

"I am happy." He nodded at me. I leaned up and pressed my lips to his. Showing him how much I needed him, wanted him, loved him. And he knew I meant it. Every part of me could not live without him. I like to think that he thinks that same way. I do not care if he does. All I care about is that he loves me, and we are together right now. That is all that matters.

A/N: I hope you all like this. I do, but again, I am not you. Please review. Thanks.