We were in front of his house with a great many commanders around us. I remembered, I was so scared, because a small child's life depended on us. He was the eleventh kid, who was kidnapped and we didn't want him to end, like the other children – dead.
Unfortunately he recognized us, and started to treat us. He said, he wanted to speak with me, and I'm the only one who is allowed to go inside of the house. I didn't know, if it was a trap, or he just thought I wasn't as dangerous as the others. But still, what did he want from me? At that moment it didn't really matter at all.
I remembered, I looked at Hotch, who was now a bit uptighter than usual, however he didn't show it – I just knew him enough to tell such things. After a few moment he noticed, that I practically stared at him and nodded.

I began to walk toward the house and my fear became bigger and bigger. I knew that everyone was looking me, waiting, if any bad would happen. Luckily I reached the door without any problem.
I opened the door and stepped into the house. The death silence greeted me, taking away my left courage. I wanted to turn back so badly, however I couldn't do that with this innocent child. I stepped again, when the door suddenly closed behind me. It was like a horror movie, where I was the main character… but in those movies no one stays alive.
I shook my head. I mustn't think about such stupidity like this. Me and John will get out of here alive!

I heard some noises from a room, so I made my way there. My heart was beating so fast and loud, I was afraid, that he would hear that, come out and kill me.
Once I arrived there, I swallowed hard, inhaled deeply and opened the door.
Inside the room I saw our unsub and the poor child – fortunately, he was alive. The only thing that really worried me was that knife in his hand.

"So our little guest has arrived…" He said suddenly and I winced at his voice. It was a serious, but I realized the craziness too. "Greet our friend, John" he told the boy. When I looked at him, I saw the fear in his eyes. I wanted to smile at him to convince, we'll be fine, but I couldn't.

"H…hello" I heard his small voice. I just nodded to him, like Hotchner usually does; I wasn't able to do more than that. I knew, I should comfort him with my behavior, however I wasn't Hotch. Instead I looked back at the unsub.

"What do you want from me?" I asked, whereon he started laughing. "What?"

"Oh, little, poor child. I just needed someone, who will stay with the boy, until I prepare for his execution. I can hardly wait it! Oh, how fantastic, when the metal get in the flash, and fresh blood come out and run down his body…. oh, how much I like it. That's my favorite part of everything. Don't be afraid, sweetheart, you'll be the next after him… You'll be the cherry on the cake. Your partners made the right decision… They let you in, to the cave of lion. What are their plan? They think, they'll save you? No-no. Do you know what would happen if someone open the front door? Bamm! The whole house, me, you, the child and everyone in 5 mile section would explode." He laughed then and a shiver ran down my spine.

"You're crazy." I mumbled, but he just smirked at me.

"Sweet cheeks. You're too nice with me. Let me thank you." He sniggered then took up the knife and cut my cheek with it. I hissed at the sudden pain, but I kept myself. "You're not so funny. Let's try it again." He ripped off my shirt and started his took his knife to my neck. "Would you like me to caress you?" He asked and licked his lips. It was disgusting, but rather me than John.

"Go to the Hell!" I whispered to him smiling. I knew, I shouldn't make him angry, because the sadistic types of killer are much more dangerous than the average ones, when they lose control.

"Oh, so you finally understood my rules! Let's play!" He told me big with pleasure and when he stab his knife into me and started swinging it inside me, I realized what he meant under "playing". I screamed from the top of my lungs, and after 6 minutes and 34 seconds he pulled out the knife from me. I fell on my knees and put my hand to the wound. I felt my warm blood running down my chest and I started to feel dizzy and my eyes closed.

'Open your eyes, Spencer Reid, or John and people outside will die! Open your eyes for God's sake!'

When finally I did as my mind command me, I saw one of the worst things in my life.
That sadistic crazy started playing the same game with the children, too. He must thought I was unconscious, because he didn't even bounded me, just left me lying on the ground.
I looked around to find something, whereby I could hit him and save us from this Hell. After a while I fortunately found a bar iron – the only problem was, that I wasn't strong enough to stand up without any noise, get the bar iron and hit him with that – I wasn't Morgan, nor Hotch. But I had to try everything.

I stood up quietly – although I couldn't strangle a low hiss, but luckily he was too busy with his game – He was drawing stars and rings with his knife into John's chest. I knew, it was very dangerous to just hit him, when he was near to John, but I didn't have other chance.

"Hey!" I called him, but he didn't turn around. I tried louder and louder, however he didn't care about me. I tried once more, but nothing, so I lifted the bar iron and pounded down with it.

*

I was too brutal…

It was my fault.

It shouldn't happen that way.

It was not supposed to happen.

These sentences repeated in my mind after I saw, what I have done.

He died – that was obvious. But when I have leant to see, how John was… I will never forget it.

The knife… the knife was lodged in his chest. His eyes were widened with shock. I ran to him to check his pulse. Luckily he had, but it was too low. His heart was beating so slowly.
I stroked his face gently and picked up. His tears were flowing down his cheeks and I unwillingly wiped them away, because it just made me feel worse.

I made my way to the back door, because in my point of view, he didn't think, that anyone would come in there. I found the key in the lock, so I opened the door.

I was right. There was no explosion, he was too naïve – by good fortune.

I began walking towards the others, while I tried to warn them not to go inside through the front door, but I felt dizzy and I couldn't get out a full sentence, just discontinuous words.

"Someone… help… don't… front door… bomb…he…injured… help!" I shouted.

I fell on my knees, but I still hold John tightly. I heard footsteps and somebody was calling my name.

"Reid!" He said. I raised my hand, but didn't relax on John's hold. I looked up and saw that the concerning voice was coming from Hotch, who was now kneeling in front of us. His eyes mirrored worry. "Spencer! Let him go…"

"He needs help, Hotch, he... the knife… my fault…" I moaned and I didn't understand them. Why are they just standing there…

"Spencer…" I heard Hotch's voice again and watched him coming closer to me. "Spencer… he's dead."