DBZ Takes Over RAW
By: DMEX
Typical disclaimers apply
-RAW Locker Room-
Piccolo is meditating when CM Punk and his gang come in. He senses them but doesn't say anything to them (at first)
CM Punk: Can you move? You're in the way of my locker.
Piccolo: …
Luke Gallows: Didn't—
Piccolo: I heard the first time! I'm not moving so get lost!
CM Punk: Who the hell do you think you are!?
Piccolo: I'm going to be your worst nightmare if you don't get lost!! NOW!!
CM Punk smirks and pulls out clippers out, but they shatter instantly when he pulls them out
Piccolo: Try not to pull out something so obvious that I can see it.
CM Punk: You must be—
Piccolo (Angry): SHUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH!!
Goku comes in right about now
Goku: Is there a problem?
Piccolo: You're looking at them right now, Goku.
Goku has heard of the notorious Straight Edge Society and the leader CM Punk
Goku: You're CM Punk, aren't you?
CM Punk: In person!
Goku: You've hurt too many innocent people. And tonight; your reign of terror ends. It will be me, Piccolo facing both of you. And she's barred from ringside.
Sereta: What the hell!?
Goku: You on the other hand will be facing someone who's been WANTING to clean up your act, my wife Chi-Chi!!
Piccolo: Just like in our match; both of you are barred from ringside!
Piccolo and Goku walk out of the Locker Room
-Meanwhile in the RAW Ring-
The Miz: Tonight guest hosts are MORONS!! You got a jolly green giant, a Wildman, a controlling dictator bitch, robots, stupid kids and little talking animals!!
The crowd is booing Miz
The Miz: Oh boo me?! What is this; Looney Tunes all over again! Reality check: This isn't your Saturday morning cartoons, this is Monday Night RAW!!
DBZ Budokai 3 Main theme plays as Chi-Chi, Goku, Kid Trunks, Goten, Gohan, Videl, Launch (Evil), Krillin, Android 18, Master Roshi Yamcha, Tien, Chiaotzu, Piccolo, Bulma, Vegeta, Ox King, Majin Buu (fat), Mr. Satan "Hercule", Oolong, Puar and Dr. and Mrs. Briefs come out. The crowd is going crazy as many bow down in their presence.
Chi-Chi: So you think we're morons, eh?
The Miz rolls his eyes at her
Chi-Chi (angry): LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING YOU YOUNG MAN!!
King: Oh my God. This is going to be ugly.
Cole: You're not kidding; we've heard that tone of voice out of her before!
Launch: Chich, I got this one.
Pulls out a Uzi on Miz
Cole: Put the gun away!!
King: No way, Cole. She's laying down the law, this is great!
Launch: ALRIGHT TOUGH GUY, YOU WANT TO SHOOT YOUR MOUTH OFF, YOU GOT YOUR WISH! 'CAUSE YOUR FACING TIEN TONIGHT IN A STEEL CAGE MATCH WITH WEAPONS.
King: Oh my God!!
Miz: So I have to face three eyes?
Launch: OH IT GETS BETTA; NOT ONLY ARE YOU GOING TO FACE TIEN TONIGHT, LATER, YOUR FACING THE VERY MAN YOU SUCKA PUNCHED LAST WEEK, M,V,P FER THAT UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP! IF YOU LOSE, (WHICH YOU WILL) YOU CAN CONSDIA YERSELF IN DA UNEMPLOYMENT LINE!!!
Crowd cheers as The Miz looks in anguish
Launch: AND TO THE BOYS AND THE DIVAS IN THE BACK; YOUSE GOT A PROBLEM WID US, SPEAK NOW FOREVER SHUT UP!!
All is quiet until Sheamus' music comes out
Sheamus: Who da e'll are yas!? Judge, jury, executioner?
Oolong: That's some talk for a poor man's version of Ronald McDonald.
Everyone laughs in the crowd, even Goku thinks it's funny
Sheamus: YOU BETTA SHUT YAR MOUTH BEFAR I PUT YA ON A GRILL!
Oolong: Don't even joke about something like that!
John Cena's Music plays and Cena comes out
Cena: The pig is right, Sheamus. You can't grill him; he's the guest host on MONDAY NIGHT RAW!!
Crowd cheers
Vegeta: You want an opponent tonight, red meat? You got one, against me, The Prince of all Saiyans!!
DBZ Budokai 3 music plays as they leave the ring!!
-Diva's Locker Room-
Maria screeches
Maria: GET OUT YOU PERVERT!!
Blow lands and out goes Oolong, Triple H walks by
Triple H: What the hell was that about?
Oolong: uhhh… Nothing…
Triple H: Out with it pig!
Bulma grabs him, turns him upside down, shakes him and out comes Maria's bra
Bulma: I knew it! PIGGGYY!!
His stomach gets upset and he runs away
Triple H: Where'd you learn to keep him line?
Bulma: A voice sensitive pill I had him take an hour before we got here.
Triple H (smirks): I think we just found a way to humiliate CM Punk.
Bulma and Triple H have that smirk
Bulma: I think it's time he finally takes his medicine.
Yamcha is running down the hall and runs into Triple H and Bulma
Triple: What's the rush about?
Yamcha: Bulma; your not going to believe this. GOKU JUST CHALLEGNED THE UNDERTAKER!!
Bulma freaks out
-Vince's office-
Chi-Chi's yelling is heard outside the door
Chi-Chi: What do you mean, "Goku challenged The Undertaker!?!?!"
Vince (solemnly): It's out my hands, Taker already accepted it.
-Back Stage-
Gohan: Dad, you can't be serious!
Goku: It's something I have to do.
Krillin: Be careful, Goku.
Roshi: Same here, Goku. The Undertaker is a very powerful opponent to fight.
Chi-Chi: Goku, you better not die!
Goku: I know your worried Chi-Chi, but this something I have to do.
Videl: If Shawn Michaels couldn't beat him, what makes you think you can?
Piccolo: We got to face CM Moron and his gang in about 10 minutes.
Bulma comes in with Triple H
Bulma: I already took care of that.
Triple H: This is going to priceless. Watch this.
Hornswoggle comes in dressed like CM Punk
Triple H: ShowMiz.
Hornswoggle runs away and all you can hear in the background is farting and bathroom noises
Videl: Sooooo…. What did you just do?
Bulma: We 'gave' CM Punk and his gang some 'candy' that will guarantee his ultimate humiliation. Goku all you have to say is (inaudible)
Goku: Got you.
Trunks and Goten come out, they have DX attire on
Goten: Trunks; are we actually going to doing this?
Trunks: Yeah, Goten. We're the new DX!
Chi-Chi doesn't like the sound of it but would rather not question Triple H's questionable choice.
Tien beat up Miz and is now unemployed. Vegeta beat Sheamus with an RKO like move he calls the VKO (Vegeta Knock Out). He didn't even need to go Super Saiyan. Now it comes down to Goku and Piccolo's match. Once Goku uttered D-Generation X CM Punk, Luke Gallows and Sereta literally had some bowel issues! The Main Event of he evening, GOKU VS THE UNDERTAKER!
-RAW Ring-
Undertaker: Goku, you want to face a God of Death to avenge Shawn Michaels? That's fine, but after tonight; you will REST IN PIECE!!!!!
DBZ Budokai 3 music plays as Goku comes out, he has Edge's entrance
Goku and The Undertaker face off. Taker ends up doing a Tombstone Piledriver but somehow Goku kicks out. Pulls out a bag of Senzu Beans, munches it down and he beats Taker by using Taker's own Tombstone Piledriver on him.
-Meanwhile in the back-
CM Punk and his gang were all put through Tables and are out cold. Trunks came out bloody but OK.
Trunks (to Goten): We fought, I put them through Tables.
Goten: Uhhh…
Trunks (like Triple H to CM Punk): AND IF YOU AREN'T DOWN WITH THAT WE GOT 2 WORDS 4 YOU!!
Goten: Run away.
Trunks: No you dummy. (flips CM Punk off) SUCK IT!!!!!
Goten: Run away!!
Kane Chokeslams Trunks and Goten through glass tables
The End?