Warning: Rated "M" for a reason. Don't like, don't read. Constructive criticism is welcomed, as well as compliments on how amazing I am.
Also, The "canadian's" that Percy is so racist against is the Laestrygonians Giants. I don't know how to spell it, autocorrect is helpful, thank you, and it's way too time consuming to constantly write it. Also, I thought it was funny. No offense meant to you if your canadian, i swear i actually like you guys.
PERCY IS OOC, LIKE REALLY REALLY OOC, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Rest of authors note at bottom.
Percy P.O.V
I hate Giants.
I mean, I really hate Giants.
Big ass, ugly, motherfucking, Giants.
It all started with those damn Canadians- yes, I know, they aren't actually Canadians, but I hate them too. The only thing good about them is Canadian Bacon and that's because it has bacon on the end of the name- Those damn Canadians in the summer before the Sea of Monsters quest, then they upgraded to Frost Giants when we fought Kronos, then they upgraded again (what are they Comcast? No I don't want your extreme package!) the premium package, which included immortality unless a demigod and A god teamed up to kill it.
Gods damn it, do I hate Giants.
Currently my Father, Annabeth, and I are destroy- (cough) I mean, fighting, Poly-nobody-cares. Basically, we were playing with him.
Strike One.
PolyJerkOff gets a lucky shot on Poseidon and I turn to make sure he isn't too injured.
Strike Two.
I then, in my infinite wisdom, abandon the battle to help my father stand- because for some reason (COUGH PLOT COUGH) he was shrunk back to human size after getting bitch smacked across a mountain.
Strike Three, You're Out.
Behind me, I hear a loud scream, followed by the squelch of skin breaking and blood moving, then the thump of a body hitting the ground. Now I want you to think of the Six-Million-Dollar-Man theme song as I turn my head, except it wasn't very cool and a lot more shitty. I finish my turn to find my girlfriend pinned to the ground by a massive trident through her stomach.
Now that's certainly not what I want my girlfriend impaled with.
There she was, Annabeth, the Survivor, having faced Kronos, poisoned daggers, Tartarus and much much more, only to fall because of a few seconds of me being careless.
Have I mentioned my hatred of Giants? I lied. I loathe the bastards.
Now I know what you're thinking, unless you're Canadian and you're thinking about a sheep and how pretty it looks from behind, in that case, keep your thoughts to yourself! Anyways, you're thinking,
"What the hell are you doing standing there?! Help her!"
In fact, Annabeth was probably playing a Kevin Hart inside her head,
"Help me! Help! Me! Ninja!"
And yes, I did censor that last word.
And of course, I would most certainly be doing that, that is if my body wasn't paralyzed by grief and anger. Horrified, I watched as PolySoonToBeDead ripped his trident out of her stomach, and laughed with glee as he watched the pool of blood grow exponentially.
Shaking with so many conflicted emotions, I slowly walked over to her and collapsed onto my knees.
I wanted to deny it. I wanted to believe my eyes were tricking me, that this was some sort of sick joke. I mean, seriously, I just can't be losing the one that loves me as I love her (looking at my right hand I can say not everyone but you get the gist of it).
I've lost so many people.
Bianca and Zoe.
Lee Fletcher and Castor.
Beckendorf and Selena.
Michael Yew.
My blow up doll, I mean it just popped one night and- I mean, uh, ignore that.
Luke.
And now Annabeth.
I snap out of my thoughts and realized I was crying as my beloved reached out with her hand, grasping mine.
"Per - Cy. Puh - Lease (wheeze)."
She tries to finish what she says as I sob into her hand.
"Don-Don't forget. To live. For me. I-I l-love y-you…(sigh)"
And that was that. Her final words rang in my head as I slowly closed her glazed storm gray eyes.
They can't do this.
They can't do this.
They can't do this.
Not here.
Not now.
They dare- they dared- to take more from me.
I will make them pay!
Yes I know very cliche but I'm mean what would you do if the girl you loved just got practically cut in half and then with their dying breath told you to live and love and that she still loves me? Yes Canadians, I get it, you have twice as much now, would you stop? You know, I hope Frank never reads this.
And then I exploded (and not in the good way). I mean, almost literally exploded with power. I'm later told that it was the most terrifying thing the rest of the Seven have ever seen. Even a few of the gods shivered in fear, although Zeus has denied it most viciously. Of course, I have no idea if this is true, as I was too busy ripping apart anything that was brave enough to stand in front of the very angry man with a bronze sword and water powers.
But I digress.
Now, when I said I was consumed by rage, I wasn't kidding. I was chopping off heads, dismantling monsters insides, ripping off limbs, and having a grand ole time. My anger didn't let me question why they weren't turning into golden dust until after I passed, or that I was soaked from head to toe in water from losing control of my powers. No, my anger said one thing and I was only too happy to comply. It said "Kill."
Later, after the army was destroyed by none other than yours truly, it ended with me standing in front of the bane of Zeus, the Giant king himself, PhoyiSomethingOrNot.
"So, puny human, you think to challenge M- ARGH" Big and Ugly's not-so-wonderful speech was interrupted by me slicing off his arm with a water wave.
"Grr, You Dare to Atta-OWWWWW" Once more, Big, Ugly, and Stupid was stopped from finishing his talk by a water in the shape of a fist slamming into his gut.
"Soooo, are we gonna fight, or are you gonna sit there and cry like a bitch about a 5'10" demigod kicking your 20ft. Tall ass?" Was my comeback as I send Riptide through his foot.
He opened his mouth to speak again, so I ripped my sword out of his foot and sent it into his ankle, changing his words to a screech of pain. I swear, what is it with bad guys and their speeches? C'mon, my girlfriend just died, and you want to sit there and have tea over a conversation about death and destruction?!
So finally, Thunder Thighs (Not Thalia, the other Thunder Thighs. No, not Zeus. Think about it. Agh, there you go.) got his head out of his arse and grabbed his spear, launching the butt of it into the ground and sending lightning into my cheek and chest, as well as forcing me 10ft. Into the side of a mountain.
"Ha, that's one gnat smashed. Who's next?!" gloated Smog Breath.
I sigh and roll my eyes. Hello, son of the Earthshaker.
I flex my arms and use the earth to launch myself out of my makeshift prison, straight at the Giant, and slamming my foot into his gigantic nose.
"AGH MY NOSH, MY NOSH!" cried the pained, fugly Giant.
Me, being the amazing and badass guy I am, landed straight on my ass.
"OW MY ASS, MY ASS! See, screaming out your pain ain't hard." I told Le Idiot.
"YOU SUT UP!" He howled back.
During the disappointing word battle, I forgot that getting slammed into the earth at a high velocity would certainly get a person a few cuts.
And Gaea only needed the blood of a Male Demigod to rise.
Now put two and two together. Did you reach four? No? Neither did I- gods I hate Math.
So, my blood hits the ground and the earth started to bubble.
And all I could think was,
"SON OF A-" RUMMBLE.
"HA. HAHA. HAHAHAHAHAHA. YOU PUNY GODLINGS WILL TASTE THE EARTH'S RAGE!" The Lord of being a Mommy's Boy(first only because I hate him more than Zeus) yelled into the sky.
I look over at my Father and give him the look that says,
Gods, does this guy ever stop talking?
His look back said,
Now you know why this is Zeus's bane.
I nod in complete understanding, then jerked my head towards the giant and mimicked stabbing. My Father nodded and heaved his Trident onto his shoulder. As he was about to throw it, I swung my hand upwards and curled it into a fist. Water obeyed my command, and a huge ice spike struck right where most people call 'Exit Only', which is a misnomer, because this is his Saturday Night. The resounding shriek was about three octaves higher than any normal or not-normal human could ever make it, unless you're Canadian and near a sheep. Don't look at me like that you know you do! Poseidon, seeing his chance, launched his symbol of power right into the Giant's chest, ensuring his demise.
So I know you're expecting a 'Yay Percy Jackson saved us all!'
And you'd be right, c'mon this is my story here!
Except one small, tiny little, detail.
Mother Earth is awake and pissed.
The ground starts to rumble more, and it's hard to stay on my feet. It's my job to shake the Earth, dammit!
"I AWAKEN FROM MY SLEEP!" The rather deep voice of Gaea echoes. Jeez you'd think this girl smoked a pack a day to get that deep a voice. Or she sucks a lot of… Never mind.
"NOW IS THE TIME I- I- Holy shit did… Did you guys actually kill all my children?"
I laugh in response.
"Not just killed, but I stuck an icicle up Lightning's Bitchs' ass, and he screamed so much you'd've thought he had enjoyed it. And can we skip the whole 'Im'a destroy the world' speech? 'Cause I've had that more than the speeches a doctor gives you on being healthy- seriously you bad guys need to give your lungs a break once in awhile! Between all the screams of pleasure from ass-raping and evil speeches…"
Who knew the Earth could get so red! Then again, tomatoes are a thing.
"YOU DARE-" She started.
"Yes, I dare! Holy shit, a guy actually has balls to talk bad about his enemies! Now seriously, quit the talking and do more fighting!"
She smiled evilly. "If that is your wish."
Finally someone who speaks English! And- wait is Gaea shrinking? Yeah she's definitely shrinking. Okay then, easier for me to kill her! She's about 6'6" now, and wielding two earthy swords. Her eyes are a mud brown, completely, because the white stuff is overrated (according to lesbians at least). Her hair is also a mud brown, and… You know what, come to think of it, everything is brown except her clothes, which is a mix of blue and green dress. Atrocious, not only to fashion, but who the hell fights in a dress?!
Charging forward, I swing my sword and lop her head off.
Yay, Gaea's Dead! Whoohoo!... Now if you actually fell for that, then damn, either you're really gullible or your Canadian. Can't tell you which is worse to be honest.
Her body just grew another head and she smirked. That's when Percy Knew… He fucked up.
She swung her sword right towards my chest, and was blocked by riptide. However, I forgot about the other sword, which went swinging at my head and forcing me to duck and roll backwards.
"Oh come on, Perseus Jackson, is that the best you can do? If so, I think I'm going to have to end this quickly. I've got things I gotta do, such as murder your friends, family, home and Camp. In fact, you're so boring I might as well do it now!"
She turned towards the body of Annabeth and swung her sword. The Earth came up and grabbed it, swallowing her unmoving body.
I swore loudly and charged the Earth Mother. She grinned and matched me blow for blow.
"Now I'm getting ANGRY!" I scream, and swing my sword downwards. She blocked it with both of her swords in an X.
"Is that the best you have?" She asked.
I grin and shook my head.
She frowned in confusion, that is until I kicked my leg upwards and slammed my foot into her stomach, knocking her for a loop.
I immediately stab my sword through her chest, pinning her… To the earth. Ah, crapbaskets.
Of course, she just mockingly smirked and melted into the Earth.
Authors Note
Alright, so.
Did you like it? Review or PM, I'd like to know if i should write more or just… stop?
Okay, enough thirsting for reviews, was this kickass or what?
Also, here's some points you may bring up in reviews, and i can hopefully satisfy your curiosity for the moment. Any other questions should be directed to the PM or Reviews section.
1st) Highschool DxD is not here yet, because i wanted to establish Percy's character and OOC-ness.
2nd) I know, I had Percy so OOC it actually probably hurt some of you, but I wrote Percy to be more… vulgar, pervy and adult-like than normal because that's the way I want him for when he joins Highschool DxD.
3rd) No I have no idea when I will write another chapter.
4th) No I have no idea when I will put Highschool DxD in the story, though it will most likely be after Percy finished his fight with Gaea and or he dies some way, somehow.
5th) Percy will join the ORC, but he may or may not be a Devil. That is undecided.
6th) He will magically speak Japanese and not question it.
7th) Paring is undecided. You can help with that by giving me suggestions! HOWEVER, please limit suggestions to PM's so that I will be able to talk with you on it. Any Guest reviews will be ignored, and reviews with suggestions will only be addressed if you PM afterwards, or you answer my "thank you for reviewing" PM, and bring it up. My current thoughts are on Kuroka, Koneko, Thalia or Reyna (With Magical Author Powers I can teleport them to the DxD world!) , or an OC. This is not written in stone, and if you can give me a better girl (because, by the time you've read this you should know that Percy is straight considering he has, or had, a blow up doll) and a good enough reason to convince me, it may be them.
8th) I'm thinking about adding other gods, specifically Shinto gods, for the pure reason of I wanna write how they will react to Percy. He may or may not gain powers from them.
Make sure you check out my other stories if you're bored!
Hopefully, my long-ass author's notes have answered a good amount of your questions! If you have any other, please don't be afraid to ask, because if i missed something, I'll want to fix it.
I hope you enjoyed and are thinking about reviewing, because i'm talkative and need a friend :D
Until Next Chapter
-The most badass of Romans
