by Megan Auffart
Okay, so this might be slightly blasphemous, but it's STILL CUTE, dammit! Anyways, review and tell me how dumb this is, but please don't preach at me. I hate that and it only makes you sound like a zealot...which might be the impression that you're trying to make, but whatever. Try to curb the urge for once. Thanks.
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Today I stood at my garden gate
And saw the worms writhe on the ground
And the beetles crawl on the leaves
And the flies buzz around my face
Today I stood and watched them
Doing their business
And felt like a god
Some strange insect deity
Watching over them all
A thought crossed my mind
And I stood up and shouted
"Come, my insects!
Come unto me,
for my way is the way
to the kingdom of heaven!"
A brave bug approached me
Sticking its antenna out of the ground
Scurrying towards my feet, abdomen quivering
Apprehensive of being so near
such an important god
I bent down my awesome head
And looked upon the supplicant
Wondering at its bravery
Admiring its shining shell
And whispered at its back
"Come unto me, oh insect,
For I know the way unto paradise!"
It crawled forwards in humble posture
Its belly scraping against the dirt
I looked at it and I marveled
At how fearless some insects are
Then, without hesitation
I lifted my heel and slammed down my foot
On the insect, its tiny legs quivering
Till its little heart beat no more
For that, my friends,
Is the way into heaven
And I shall deliver all bugs
To the gardens of paradise