By Spectra
As I sit here right now I'm wearing my most precious shirt; the one with Zim on it, laughing triumphantly as if the world were his for the taking. If only that were true.
I'm not angry yet, just sort of numb. That's just the way I tend to react because it always takes a while to sink in when crap like this happens. I'll be like this for a bit, then I'll be sad, then I'll be angry way later on, but for now it's just numbness.
I feel like I'm about to write a damn eulogy here… I don't even know how to begin, so I'll just tell you my story of what an offbeat, twisted, beautifully animated little show called 'Invader ZIM' has meant to me. Kind of a tribute of sorts, plus what I plan on doing in the future. My mind is all over the place right now, so please bear with me if this is just a bunch of rambling as I'm too upset to really think coherently.
Well, I suppose I should start when I first laid eyes on this amazing show. I didn't even start watching 'Zim' until the show had been on for a while, and for this I'm regretful, but when I finally did see it the first thing that caught my eye was the stunning artwork. You don't see beautiful fluidity of movement, or the brilliant colors and shading like that everyday. Me, being an artist of sorts, immediately fell in love with the style and over all look of the show. I wanted to aspire to this, and this is the first thing that IZ did for me was to inspire my drawing, plus it got me off drawing Anime' for a while (if you want to see just HOW big an influence on my art IZ was, just take a look here: http://www.side7.com/art/tarysand/gallery.html )
After a few viewings, I got more into the characters. At first, Zim was my favorite, but as I watched more and more and managed to tape all the episodes, I started getting very attached to one particular, black haired paranormalist. Dib quickly became my favorite character, and like HelgaGP (I hope she doesn't mind me mentioning her here, but I LOVED her 'I can't give up' fic) I will openly confess that I, a 19 year old adult, developed and still have a crush on him.
Is this really so weird? I know people who don't appreciate IZ would think so. I mean come on, a technically adult woman has the hots for an eleven year old cartoon character!? How ridiculous is that? But I don't think it's so odd. After all, Invader Zim clearly appeals to a much older audience than other Nick shows, and there's just something about Dib's personality I admire so much. Maybe it's the non-mainstream way he dresses (that trench coat and those boots of his fucking rock my world!). It could be that the way he doesn't seem to care what other people think and continues to do his own thing despite the way the kids tease him. I really don't know just what it is, but he's just so damn adorable! There's something about him that just makes me wanna cuddle his widdle body until his bones break ^_^ Ugh, see? I told you I was prone to rambling right now. Anyway, back to my point which is… well, I forget, but I guess another thing this show did for me was to give me someone to crush on. I'm sorry I won't get to see the episode where Dib's all grown up, I bet he turns out pretty sexy. Call me weird if you want, but this is how I feel so why bother to pretend that I don't love Dib? Really, I just love his attitude and personality. Sure he's cute 'n all, but I really dig his character and wish there were more guys like him in real life.
Well, I think I just made enough of an idiot of myself there so I'll try to get on with this. After a little while longer I'd drawn a few more pieces of fanart and was just starting to develop an intense interest in… well, you know who… when, in a moment of boredom, I decided to read a few Zim fanfics. Now I'd never heard of FF.N at the time so I was reading these off of some fansites, but they got me interested enough to read more. Why is this significant? Because not once, EVER in my whole life, have I ever read ANY fanfiction for any other show except Invader Zim. No other show ever interested me enough before to do so. But even more importantly than me reading fanfics, is the fact that 'IZ' is the first and, so-far, ONLY show that I've ever WRITTEN fanfics for! Just that fact, that I never wrote any fanfics for any other shows, I feel is a big illustration of just how special the show really is. Yes. Special. I like that word. It really is a special show, not just amazing, wonderful, brilliant, awesome, or stunning, but special. There are a lot of shitty shows, there are a few okay shows, and there's maybe a handful of good shows, but maybe in my life I've only come across two, three shows at most, that I would consider truly deserving of the label 'special', and Invader Zim is one of them. Like I say in the title, it's not just a show. For me, and many of you, it's a very real, very meaningful part of our lives. We know these characters and in most cases, actually have feelings for them as if they were real people… or um, aliens as the case may be. Or robots.
Dammit, I did it again. All hail the Babble Queen -_-;; Okay, let me review my points one more time in a plain, matter-of-fact manner: Invader Zim…
1) Gave me some new inspiration with my drawing and art style
2) Introduced me to my very favoritest cartoon characters to date, especially Dib
3) For the first time got me interested in fanfiction, both reading it and writing it, not to mention it eventually led me to this great site called FanFiction.Net
But that's only so far. Not only did Invader Zim inspire me artistically and creatively in the way of the show itself, but it also inspired me with a million original ideas for stories, new characters, comics, and writing I could do that didn't involve the characters from the show. It was sort of a mind-opener that let all sorts other things flood into my brain that I'd never experienced before. A creative juice-loosener, if you will.
Another miracle of IZ was it got me into Jhonen Vasquez's other works and let me see his kick-ass art style. I'm now a huge JTHM and Squee! fan, and just today I went out and finally bought 'I Feel Sick.' I'd never have known that his genius existed if not for this show.
One of the very best things about this show was sharing it. Not only did it introduce me to a lot of my friends on line, but my friends that I hang out with loved the show too. We had some awesome nights where I'd bring over my Zim tapes and Joe, Jason, Scott, Mike, Tina and I would just sit there and watch them. We'd even go around acting out the show in public; one particularly fond memory was of all of us waiting for our other friends to come to the bowling alley, so we're waiting out in the parking lot for them to get there and we must have stood there for a half hour just reciting Zim quotes and singing the 'Doom' song. People were walking by staring, but it didn't matter at all. Which brings me to another thing IZ did for me: it helped me to just be myself. I was having so much fun that night I didn't care what anyone thought of me or my friends. There's something about Invader Zim that gave me confidence. I can't explain it, it's almost paranormal how the show perked my confidence (perhaps Dib could figure it out), but the fact is that it did, and that's all that matters.
So, after all that, it's over. Zim and Dib will never again brighten my life with their rivalry. GIR will never again make me smile with his child-like innocence, and Gaz and her grumpy attitude will never again remind me of myself. It's all done for, right?
HELL NO!!!!! Because they can't take away that part of my life that has given me so much so easily! No one can ever take away the show that inspired me with so much artistic creativity, gave me something to look forward to, let me meet all these wonderful people, inspired my writing of fanfics and my own character ideas, AND helped me come to the conclusion that I want more than anything to become an animator someday. I don't care what stupid, dumbfuck Nick does to Zim, they can't keep me from holding close all the show has given to me.
I'll continue to write my fanfics, finishing the one's I've started, and trying to write new ones as well. I won't stop drawing pictures of Dib, Zim, GIR, and Gaz, and in fact will probably draw now more than ever. I'm going to finish my Invader Zim fan comic no matter how long it takes me. I'm not gonna let Zim die; it's just too important of a show to let that happen. They can cancel it all they want, but I'm going to keep on doing what I do. Like I said before, the IZ means too much to too many people to let it pitter out. Rather than stopping the fanart and fanfiction and fansites, there should be more of these things than EVER! I don't care what ANYONE says or how stupid they may think it is that I feel the way I do. People might turn up their snooty little noses and tell me to get a life, not to worry about a silly cartoon show when there are bigger problems in the world, but for me, IZ was one of those things that made those problems seem 'not-so-bad,' and I think that a lot of people will agree with me. Invader Zim was is not just a cartoon, but something that united fans from every corner of the planet and inspired us all. And for me, it will continue to invoke that same inspiration no matter how many reruns they show.
I just felt I had to write this, and now that I've put in my two cents I'll just go get back to my life now which STILL includes Dib, Zim, and everyone else who's meant so much to me, inspired me, and helped me to be a better person artistically, creatively, and mentally. I love you! ^-^ Thank you Jhonen, for bringing them into this world.
And hang in there IZ fans. It sucks, I know, but we don't have to give it all up. Don't let those Nickelodeon bastards take it away from us.
Okay, I'm done with my little opinion piece about this sickening little happenstance called 'cancellation'. Yeah, I'm angry, but I'm sticking to what I said and will try to be optimistic. It's the only way to keep Zim, GIR, and of course my little Dibby alive, and maybe preserve my last remaining thread of sanity too. If you review this, please… no flames. It's just my ranting opinions at 1:44 in the morning, so I probably won't even remember what I said tomorrow, although I still meant every word.