Title: Judge Not

Author: Maeve Bran

Rating: T

Summary: After the events of Dominion, Daniel comforts Vala with tales of the times SG-1 have threatened each other in the line of duty.

Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate SG-1. I'm just having a little fun.

Notes: Set immediately after Stargate SG-1 10.19 "Dominion".

Daniel waited until everyone but Vala left the briefing room. Then he reached over to where Vala still sat and put an arm around her.

She had made it through the briefing without crying, but Daniel had a feeling that soon it would all hit her. As much as she annoyed him and plagued his every free moment, Daniel would never let a friend and coworker suffer through such emotional upheaval alone. He knew whatever comfort he chose to offer could very well be misconstrued, but he'd offer it any way.

"Vala," he said gently. "Do you want to talk?"

"About what?" She replied, blankly.

"About Adria. About watching her Ascend. About how you're dealing with having two sets of memories, one of which include our betrayal of you. About anything else on your mind," Daniel suggested.

"Sure. But not here. Not on base," Vala insisted. "It reminds me too much of everything."

"Ok. Where do you want to go?" Daniel inquired.

"I don't know and don't care," she answered. "As long as it is away from here, it doesn't matter."

Daniel looked at her-- really looked at her-- and noticed that she appeared close to breaking. There was no hope for it, he thought, he'd have to take her home. She might not care now, but if she lost it in public she'd hate him.

"Come on," he said as he led her from the briefing room.

Vala walked on autopilot through the signing out process. She said nothing and went where Daniel guided her. It wasn't until Daniel drove his jeep past the checkpoint that marked the entrance to the base that Vala spoke.

"Where are we going?" she asked distractedly.

"My house," he replied. She looked at him, puzzled, so he continued, "I don't go there much anymore, but it is a sound investment for all that hazard pay I accumulate."

"Oh. I thought you lived on base," Vala said to keep up her side of the conversation.

"I do now, mostly, but I haven't always. I've moved or have been moved several times since joining the SGC, but I do try to keep a place off the base to give me a sense of normality and permanence," Daniel explained.

"Oh," Vala said. "Wait, why have you been moved?"

"Those are kind of funny stories," he said with a dry laugh. "The first time was in my first year with SG-1. I was kidnapped by an Oanne named Nem. He implanted the memory of my death in the others, and they reported it to General Hammond, the general at the time. He declared me dead, held a memorial service, and had Jack, Sam and Teal'c pack up my apartment. So when I returned from the supposed dead, I had to get a new place. The other time was after my Ascension. Jack kept my personal items and some of the more interesting artifacts in storage, but they sold or donated most of my stuff and canceled my lease on that apartment. Not that I blame them, I had died for real that time."

"It would make sense," Vala said just to show she had been listening.

"Well, the next time I moved was after Osiris shot up my neighborhood," Daniel said blandly as he pulled the jeep into his driveway.

"Osiris?" Vala asked. "As in the former System Lord? Why would she do that?"

"She was an old friend. Actually an ex-girlfriend," Daniel answered as he opened the door. "Wait, you referred to Osiris as a she. I was under the impression that Sarah was the only female host he'd ever had. So when did you meet her?"

Vala followed him inside. "There was this summit of various, for a lack of a better term, female Goa'ulds," Vala explained. "While Osiris liked to pretend he was still a he, he knew that he could get certain information better if he took advantage of his current female form, so he showed up. Now that I think about it, he was ranting about this one Tauri and how he'd use his host's memories against him if they ever crossed paths again. I guess that was you."

"Yeah that was me," Daniel agreed. "Osiris used a Goa'uld memory device to insert himself into my memories of Sarah to try to get me to translate a tablet that would tell him where Atlantis is. It didn't work. We were able to capture Osiris and free Sarah, but in the process, my house and a couple of cars got shot up so I had to move. I bought this house then. That was three years ago. It's the second longest I've ever had the same address in my entire life, the first being those four years just before my Ascension."

Daniel picked up the mail from where it had piled up on the floor and sorted through it. It was mostly junk because all the utilities were automatically deducted from his account so he'd never lose electricity or water. While he dealt with it, Vala slowly moved around the hall and into the living room, looking at the artifacts and books that lined the walls.

"Would you like a drink?" he asked as he set down the now sorted mail. "I have water, coffee, and tea. Unless you'd like something harder. Then I have beer or whiskey."

"Whiskey sounds good right now," Vala ventured.

"I imagine it does," Daniel said as he walked over to the small built-in bar at the side of the living room. He poured out two glasses of the amber liquid, a single shot for himself and a triple shot for her, then walked over and handed hers to her. He wasn't trying to get her drunk, but he knew from regrettable experience how hard losing family to the bad guys could be. Besides, as a former host, it took a lot of alcohol to get her drunk. He doubted that she'd get drunk if she drank two full fifths of whiskey.

"Thanks," Vala said, looking into the glass. She sat on the edge of the couch. Daniel moved to sit on the arm of the couch by her side. He was close enough to put a hand on her shoulder if it looked like she needed it but far enough away that he wouldn't crowd her.

"You were right," Vala said, glancing up at him. "Adria was my daughter. I always felt it and loved her as such. Part of me tried to believe that I didn't, because it was easier to fight her and the Ori if I believed she wasn't my daughter. If I told myself that I was just a packing crate and she the cargo, I could possibly bring myself to kill her if I had to. I almost did, you know."

"No I didn't know. When was this?" Daniel asked, quietly.

"Just before she Ascended. I grabbed the gun off of one of the unconscious airmen and pointed it at her. She used her powers to rip it out of my hands, then levitated me and choked me."

"I'm sorry." He put his hand on her back and rubbed gentle circles. "I know how you feel."

"How? Do you have some homicidal child running around the galaxy I don't know about?" Vala asked, trying to lighten the mood.

Daniel gave her a weak smile. "No children, homicidal or otherwise. But just before Sha're was killed, I had been pointing a gun at Amaunet, the Goa'uld that inhabited her. She used the ribbon device on me and made me drop the gun. The next instant, Teal'c entered the tent and shot Amaunet dead. Sha're lived just long enough to tell me that she loved me before she too died."

Vala looked up at Teal'c's name. "Teal'c killed your wife? And you trust him?"

"Yes to both," Daniel answered. "Teal'c not only killed Sha're but was the Jaffa who chose her out of a room of potential hosts. It took a while, but yes I trust Teal'c. I trust him with my life."

Vala was stunned. No wonder he had argued to have her on the team. No wonder he trusted her. She had only hijacked the Prometheus and kicked the crap out of him before he finally won. Then she had bound him to her with the bracelets for a couple months. But neither of those transgressions were as bad as what Teal'c had done. Daniel had, apparently, an endless supply of forgiveness.

When she didn't say anything, Daniel continued. "I don't want you to see Teal'c any differently than you do now. When he chose Sha're he was still First Prime to Apophis; he was doing his job. When he killed her, he did it to save my life."

She nodded.

"The rest of SG-1 have also, at one time or another, held a weapon on each of the others," he added. "Granted, threatening your friends isn't the same as threatening your daughter, but I guess what I'm saying is that none of us are going to judge you."

"Tell me about those times. I don't believe you about threatening each other. You are like family to each other," Vala said in disbelief.

"Well, there was the time that Anubis had taken me over. Teal'c zatted me, but that didn't stop him so Jack shot me with his gun. In the arm. I had been shooting up the Gate room and had taken a hostage, and they had to stop me somehow. That wasn't the first time Teal'c zatted me, either." Daniel saw her raised eyebrows at that and continued. "In our second year, Sam was taken over by a Tok'ra who was being hunted by an Ash'srak. The Ash'srak was trying to get through the Gate and was using me as a hostage. In order to get the Ash'srak, who had an arm around my neck and was using me as a shield, Teal'c had to zat me, too."

Vala was amazed. Jack, Daniel's best friend, had actually shot him. "That covers Jack and Teal'c. So what about you and Sam?"

"Sam zatted me too. Granted, she was possessed by Anubis at the time. Anubis left her for Jack, but we didn't know that, so Teal'c pointed a zat her. Heck even Mitchell has gotten in to the act," Daniel joked.

"What do you mean?" Vala asked.

"Remember when I was a Prior?" Daniel began.

"How could I forget that you let my homicidal daughter make you one of her minions," Vala said, acerbically.

"Yes, well. That's not the point," Daniel tried to get back on track. "When you beamed me on board the Odyssey, I barely got out a greeting before Mitchell zatted me." He paused. "Come to think of it, even you've zatted me."

"I have?" Vala inquired.

"How can you forget? You zatted me-- or the equivalent-- when we met. Before you removed the Kull warrior suit, you stunned me and bound me to the captain's chair of the Prometheus," Daniel reminded her.

"Oh yeah. I did," Vala remembered, then smirked. "You were so cute when you were unconscious."

Daniel blushed. "Anyway. You wanted to know about me and pointing weapons at friends."

Vala nodded, and Daniel continued. "How about a few months ago when you had a gun pointed at me and were trying to run? I had a zat pointed at you to stop you. I would have used it, too, to get you to stop. Not as payback, but to get you to stop so we could bring you back to the base."

"I'm sorry for that," Vala mumbled, looking away.

"I know you are. You were scared. I understand that," Daniel said softly.

He sat his now empty glass on the coffee table and moved to sit beside her. He put his arm around her and with his free hand took her empty glass from her hand and put it beside his.

She looked up to his eyes, with tears welling up in her own. He pulled her gently to his shoulder and wrapped the other arm around her. She sat for a moment just enjoying being held, and then the tears that she could no longer hold back fell. She cried until there was nothing left in her.

Daniel held her for a while. It felt right to him when she let her flirty- sexy armor fall away and was a vulnerable woman. It was this woman, the one he'd only had brief glimpses of, that he loved. The woman she was most of the time drove him nuts because he knew she could be much more than just the sexy ex-thief.

Since she refused to be anything but the ex-thief, he would never allow himself to give in to his growing feelings for fear she would throw them back in his face. And then there was the fact that she was still married to Tomin. He knew for a fact that Tomin was still alive because he had seen Tomin while he was still a Prior a couple of months ago.

Vala's mood shifted. She grew restless and twisted in his arms until her mouth was just inches from his. She leaned up, and unable to resist any longer, he leaned down. The kiss started out soft and tender, but then passion built. Vala tried to climb on his lap, but that was when Daniel came to his senses and ended it.

"I just can't do this, Vala," Daniel explained as he disentangled himself from her.

"Do what? Have sex? Are you incapable or something?" she asked with a bit of a bite.

"No. I'm capable. And a part of me wants to. But what then? We just have sex the one time and move on? Or do we live together? And what about Tomin? You are still married to him," Daniel pointed out as he got up and started to pace.

"Why do we have to know where this is going? Why can't we just have sex and take it from there?" she asked.

"Why?! Because I have too many feelings for you for it ever to be just sex. Besides, I have never been one to go for just sex. I can't separate my heart like that," Daniel explained. "I can be your friend. I can even be the shoulder you cry on. But I can't just be the guy you sleep with to scratch an inch or because you're bored."

Vala was stunned. Daniel hadn't said the words, but he had implied he loved her. She had hoped he did, but was never sure. After all, a man in love didn't turn down the woman when she offered him sex. But apparently Daniel Jackson would when he thought the offer came for the wrong reasons. She might just have to reconsider every time he had turned her down and reevaluate what it had meant. But that was something she'd do later.

Daniel stopped and looked at her again. He could see that his words had had an impact on her. She looked as if the thought had never occurred to her that he might have stronger feelings than she suspected.

"So, do you want to go back to the base or stay here tonight?" Daniel asked, glancing at the clock. It was almost eleven o'clock at night. "Keep in mind, if you stay there will be no sex of any kind. Just to be clear."

"Oh, I get that. I think I'd like to stay here," Vala answered, still not ready to face the base and all of the memories of recent weeks there. "But if I stay here do I have to sleep by myself?"

"As long as it is just sleeping, and you keep your hands to yourself, you can sleep with me." Daniel looked her in the eye. "Do you promise?"

"I promise," Vala agreed without looking away.

Minutes later, Vala was in Daniel's bathroom showering while Daniel put on a clean tee shirt and flannel pajama pants. When Vala emerged from a cloud of steam, she was similarly dressed, having borrowed clothes from him. The shirt was huge on her, and fortunately the pants had a drawstring or they would have been falling down.

Vala crawled under the covers. Daniel lay down on top of them, pulling up a spare quilt to cover himself. When he had settled, he stretched out an arm and she curled up to his side, pillowing her head on his chest. In minutes Vala was lulled to sleep by the sound of his steadily beating heart.

For his part, Daniel didn't fall asleep so easily. He had Vala in his bed. This time she was invited. It was a thing he had never thought would happen, but it had. After Sha're he had never thought to feel love and lust again, but now he had. He could only hope that somehow this could work out in his favor, and soon. But for now he was content to just listen to her sleep.

-x-