Disclaimer: I do not, under any circumstances, own anything to do with Harry Potter.
A/N: This is a Harry/Draco fic in a "I'm planning on making them get together and kiss" sort of way, so brace your self or find another story. :) However, it will be quite some time before that happens.
This story is rated M simply because I want to be on the safe side and not have to constantly worry about what I can or can't write. Enough with my blabbering and I hope you enjoy this story. PS. Reviews are highly appreciated.
Chapter one – Different sides of the same spectrum
A cloud of white steam rises from the red train's engine and a whistle sounds throughout the hidden platform, signalling the beginning of a new term. A term that has been both eagerly awaited and looked upon with sadness. It means the separation of children from their families while at the same time being the start of a new adventure. It means the reunion of friends and classmates as well as re-entering a world of knowledge and learning. It holds a certain element of surprise; "Who'll be this year's defence teacher?", "Will Voldemort rear his ugly horns once more?" and the most fascinating question of all, "Will Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy ever get along?".
Such are the thoughts that occupy most Hogwarts students' minds this lovely September morning as they bid their parents and younger siblings farewell and prepare to board the Hogwarts Express. Hugs, kisses and sweet words are exchanged and somewhere in the middle of this is a boy seemingly void of emotion. Said boy, or perhaps he is more of an adult these days, walks right past the families parting without as much as a sidewards glance, not even once acknowledging the presence of anyone but himself. The adolescent seems to pass the masses undetected, almost as though was he invisible, yet we and two other pairs of attentive eyes clearly see him walking across the platform. Everybody else, however, is too absorbed in matters concerning themselves to notice his determined stride and the resolute look in his steel grey eyes as he passes by.
This is a boy unfamiliar with the concept of being part of a real family, a boy only too familiar with future decisions he's not willing or ready to make. This is a boy with a distorted family history that few are able to imagine and even fewer are aware of. His shoulders are burdened with the weight of a legacy he wishes to evade and worries he wishes were not his. Yet he walks with his head held high and his shoulders squared, never once showing his inner turmoil. He is an aristocrat and will remain as such until the end of his days. Once a Malfoy, always a pureblood, and therefore the idea that you do not, under any circumstances, show emotions is firmly rooted in his mind.
While this youth is evading people outside the train another adolescent, mature well beyond his years, is dodging the prying eyes of the public by residing inside a compartment. He is sitting alone, unwilling to share the thoughts and emotions only he is privy to with the outside world. He has sworn never again to share his true self with those vultures tearing at his defences. This is a youth heavy-laden with responsibilities, a youth with enormous potential but little faith in his ability to succeed. His is the story of a boy chosen and marked at a far too early age. His is the tale of a never ceasing courage and fire. It is of him everyone expects a miracle. It is his destiny to save the world and yet he is barely an adult. He is a fighter from birth and was made an orphan at the hand of a madman. He is the real leader of the light side, its rightful guardian you might say. Yet he is only seventeen and nowhere near prepared to fulfil a prophecy created well before he was born.
The boy knows it's unjust and still he doesn't complain. He considers it his burden to bear; it is his and his alone. It doesn't bother him that everybody else is so carefree even in these times of danger. It's better that way, this is his fight and nobody else should have to be affected. He is chivalrous almost to the point of stupidity. He thinks he no longer needs the love he sees outside the compartment window. However, we and the watchful pairs of eyes, that contemplated the other youth earlier on, know him better. He still yearns to be loved and wishes that someone will see through his defences. Though he has suppressed this, and most other emotions, to be ready when time comes for him to commit the crime he will be put on a pedestal for he continues to feel. The feelings have been pushed to the far back of his mind and a door has been firmly shut between them and the rest of his mind. We can not argue with that, but we are sure he still suffers, bleeds and cries like the rest of us. Perhaps only in that small, locked cell at the back of his mind, but at least this means hope is not lost.
The most heartbreaking part is that the outer world has yet to notice. Harry Potter, their hero, is despairing and not even those who claim to be his closest friends realise it yet. Can anyone really blame him for bottling everything up what with the world being so ignorant and utterly clueless?
As the whistle blows for the final time this September morning and all the latecomers scurry to make the train Harry sits with his face pressed to the compartment window, only too happy to leave the muggle-world behind once again.
He is still alone, though Ron and Hermione's luggage – Crookshanks and Pidwidgeon included – is now keeping him company while they themselves are out on prefect business. They dropped by earlier to say hello after a summer of separation. Their visit lightened his spirits slightly, but only momentarily, and at their departure Harry couldn't help but wonder what this year would be like. Obviously it wouldn't be like the previous years, because when did that ever happen at Hogwarts or more importantly when was he, Harry, lucky enough to experience some form of continuity?
He felt worried that nothing would be as it had been before – more so than ever before – and not knowing whether that was good or bad made Harry nervous of what the future had in store for him. And so he sat alone in his compartment pondering what the future would hold as the Hogwarts Express pulled away from the station leaving saddened parents and envious younger siblings in its wake. Never realising that this time he didn't merely leave the summer behind – this time he also left every still existing part of his childhood and whatever chance at a carefree life he had ever had.