Disclaimer: Yes, I don't own Harry Potter or any of its characters. (Though, I wouldn't mind owning Remus and Sirius) If I did, do you honestly think I'd be writing fanfictions?

Hogwarts Express steamed and lurched forward, surprising some first years but was mostly neglected by those who had ridden the scarlet train for years now. Remus was one of those people who had been surprised, as much as he'd hated to admit it. He just never quite got use to the sudden feeling of movement after sitting and waiting in a still silence. He always got to the train much before anyone else, for he had no family to delay him with kisses and parting wishes. During his first and second year, the young wizard-in-training would stare out at all the people with detest, silently cursing them for having such normal lives, for having such love. Remus Lupin was alone in the world, unless you counted his pack of unruly friends, which was in truth the closest thing he had to a family.

They were with him now, chattering about what they had done over the summer break and what they planned to do this year for their big prank on their rival, Severus Snape.

"I think," started James Potter, the quote Leader of the Pack, as he ran a hand through his messy black mop of hair, "we should pull the biggest one yet! Like, make Snevillus's robes catch on fire in the middle of class!"

"Yeah!" Peter Pettigrew agreed, punching the air with a clenched fist.

"Mediocre, Prongs. How long have we been in school now? Five years! We've already set that git's robes on fire seven times; it's lost its luster. What we need to do is change something about him…that'll be hard to change back, but would be noticed by everyone at the school. Try to think of a prank like that." Sirius Black was the last to speak up, and the one who diminished James' happy attitude. Remus turned his attention back to the window for a moment, thinking about what Siri had said.

In an instant, he got the idea. Remus spun head back toward the group, a grin sliding into place. "I think I got something…"

Siri took it the worst of the gang. Peter and James just started, open-mouthed at the mere idea that Remus could indeed think of something mischievous, while Sirius clutched his heart in mock-surprise.

"Y-you! Coming up with a prank! What have you done with our Moony!" Siri grabbed Remus about the shoulders, and pulled him closer to him, scanning his face with steel-colored eyes. "Where are you Moony?" Siri cried out in a playful tone as he burst out in to a fit of laughter, hands still gripping his shoulders. Remus' breath hitched in his throat. He couldn't breath, couldn't speak. Siri had sparked something inside him that he had never felt before.

The werewolf shook and his body tensed under the soft touch of his friend. He shut his eyes to the bright blush spreading across his cheeks. What the hell was happing to him? What had Sirius unearthed? Furthermore, why was it Sirius whom had done it?

"Stop," he shirked, trying to push him away, "Let go of me!"

Immediately, Sirius let go and held his hands above his head. Panic and worry bleed in his steely eyes. "Wha--?"

"S-sorry…" Remus smiled softly, forcing the blush away and his body to stop its quaking. "It's just…Ya'know…" He trailed off, hoping Siri would pick up where the conversation was going.

Sirius nodded slowly, his eyes softening in their gaze. "No, I'm sorry. I should've been more careful…"

"It's nothing…don't worry about it…" Remus felt disgusted with himself for lying, but, he couldn't handle the feeling that was ignited for much longer. He did have to breathe to live last time he checked.

James and Peter frowned, leaning forward a bit in their seats. Prongs was the one to ask what was on the other Marauders minds.

"Bad moon phases this summer, Moony?" He inquired quietly, as if he was afraid neighboring compartments would hear.

The werewolf lowered his gaze to the floor, then out the window at the foliage that was whizzing by in a green blur. Talking about his transformations wasn't one of his favorite conversation topics. If he could, he wouldn't have answered, but he feared they would grow angry with him for keeping silent.

"Yeah…had some bad ones." He faced his friends (his family) once again, smiling to mask his pain. "But, nothing I haven't went through before. No worries."

No worries. Remus always said that, like his catch phrase. Nevertheless, it was true. He didn't want his friends to worry on his behalf. He wasn't worth it. Never was he worth anything more than pain. Truthfully, Remus didn't believe he deserved the friends he had now…one's that showed him so much love…even after they found out about his condition. They even studied and learnt advance magic that allowed them to spend the full moons with him, so he no longer had to spend nights alone, locked away in the Shrieking Shack, literally tearing himself apart with his claws and fangs. Remus felt that he was in his friends' debt, for nothing would compare to them easing his loneliness.

The group didn't speak again until they reached Hogwarts, during this time; Remus was beside himself with guilt. He shouldn't have lied…He had caused his friends to worry. Other than that, he tried to pinpoint what that feeling was…the feeling that warm his bones and dulled the aches and pains. Just what was it?

"Foooooood!" Siri cried as the traditional welcome-back feast began. Magically the food melted up from the silver plates, as if on cue to Siri's cry. There was a clatter of forks and knifes, each student eating their fill while chattering happily. Deluding the fact that his own stomach was growling with an undying hunger, Remus refused to eat. Guilt seemed to have laced his gut, making him fear any morsel that passed his lips would come up again later on. He was never one to like lying. Especially to the rest of the Marauders.

This only caused them to worry more, thus causing the guilt to multiply. He shouldn't have lied…he should've just ignored the feeling. Seriously, it was just a feeling…it wasn't going to kill him. Still, just thinking about Sirius' hands clutching his shoulders, drawling him closer to his body, made Remus shiver.

"Rem? You kay? You haven't touched your food…at all." James looked at him miserably.

Peter shoved another fork full of food into his mouth before turning to look at the werewolf, blue eyes shinning with worry for his friend. Sirius turned to him, too, his eyes showing signs of guilt. He reached out to pat him on the back, but froze mid-way. The dog-animagus didn't want to hurt his friend anymore than he had already.

The werewolf smiled, his amber eyes closing to hide his shame. "I'm fine…," he said softly, "Just not hungry, is all. No wor--"

"If you say that damn 'no worries' line again, I'm going to punch you, Rem." Siri growled. "If there's something wrong, you can tell us. We will try to help you fix it…" He placed a gentle hand on his shoulder to help emphasize his point. James and Wormtail nodded, they too were there for him, whatever the ailment, whenever the time, wherever the place. The Marauders stuck together, always. They were a pack, they were his pack. His family.

Still, he couldn't tell them about the feeling he had earlier on the train; the same odd sensation he was having now. When Siri touched him, he sensed warmth, happiness, joy, want, desire, need, love….

Love.

Was that what the feeling was…love? Remus had never felt…loved before, so it would explain why he couldn't categorize it sooner. But, that was rubbish. Why would he love Siri? How could he love his best friend? Then, the thought hit him as he shifted from Siri's hand.

He was gay. He was not only a werewolf, but now he was gay.

Great, he thought as he bowed his head and turned from his friends, I'm a gay werewolf. What will they think of me now…Surely they'll turn they're backs on me, neglect that I ever existed…God, why did you make me such a freak? Is it condemnation for the sins I have done? For sins I will do? I'm truly that…that damned…Left to want something I cannot have. Unless…I want my family to desert me…Oh Sirius…

"Rem…" James snapped his fingers in front of the werewolf's face. "You in there, Moony?"

"Oh…yes. I'm sorry." Rem laughed softly. "Just thinking about the prank you want to pull on Snape."

"Hey! You never told us your idea!" Peter piped up, another fork-full of food in his mouth.

Siri nodded, his eyes dancing. "What is it, 'O great Moony? It must be grand coming from your mind!"

Rem smiled at that. A genuine smile, not a fake one he forced into place to fool the others. It was true, what they had said earlier, Remus Lupin was not one to make up pranks. Once in the fairly rare blue moon did he dare to cite his plans.

"Well…," he said, smile twisting into a grin, "You dye his hair a sickly bright color (I myself would go with crimson--for Gryffindor, of course) then make it so he couldn't change it back with magic."

The other Maunders looked as if Remus had slapped them all in the face. Laughing softly, he rubbed a spot on his head, trying to look innocent again. Maybe…he had said something wrong? Or, mayhap his idea was mediocre too.

"That…is…brilliant!" Padfoot cried as he threw his arms around his friend, delighted with the fact that they now had a prank to pull on their rival. "You rule, Moony! This'll be a great one!"

Remus didn't speak. His face was bright pink, and his body trembled. Let go…let go, let go, let go …Sirius…let go!

But, Sirius didn't let go, far from it. His embrace grew tighter for a brief second, and Rem heard him mumble something.

"Ya'know…you smell nice, Rem."

That was it that last feeble straw the werewolf had. His blush burnt his face a horrid, noticeable scarlet. Just what had Siri meant by 'you smell nice, Rem.'? Mayhap, since Sirius' senses were heightened due to his dog counterpart, he could actually smell his scent. But, why did he…he….Did Sirius feel the same about him?

Remus stood suddenly, the thoughts being just about as bad as the physical contact with his best friend. Sirius fell forward, slamming his face on the bench.

"OUCH!" He shoot his head back up, to cast a nasty 'what the hell' glare at Rem, but he was already making his way out the Great Hall.

Remus stormed out of there without an explanation or even a spoken word, all eyes watching as he threw open the massive doors. They couldn't have known what was going on, just like the rest of the Marauders, who looked the most flabbergasted.

Soberly, Sirius broke the haunting, dead silence that had fallen over them all. "Did…did I do something wrong?"

This is my first Siri/Rem fic, so be gentle. I know it's not the best, and it may seem that I don't have a plot, but I'm getting to it. Hopefully you enjoyed reading it as much as I had writing it! (Even thought it tis horrible, I had fun)

Review please! They make me feel all happy inside :grins:

--Ele.