Chapter 1
He whispered her name, Rey thought. The word barely audible under the cacophony of the battle not far away. His eyes were shut. His brow uncreased, something so rare in his features. Body sprawled on the harsh ground and head cradled gently on her lap. Calmness had settled on him at odds with the chaos surrounding them. A shaky breath fanned wisps of hair on her forehead. "I thought I'd have more time. Maybe then I…"
"Shhh… It's ok. Don't think like that. We'll get a chance to talk about everything. Just not now." There was no way she would let him waste whatever energy he had in words that didn't matter. Finn would be here any minute. Chewbacca would be with him, she was certain of it. They'd promised her."You've got to hold on till they come and then everything will be fine. You'll see."
"Rey…"
"No, no… Just hang on a little bit longer. Any minute now…" She glanced again behind the metal container hiding them from view, eyes wide, searching. Beseeching.
"Rey… Nobody is coming for me."
She snapped her gaze back to him. His eyes were open, trained on hers.
Stars, his face was so pale… It made them look like burning embers.
"Of course they are," she rasped in protest.
Was that her voice?
That didn't sound like her.
Her throat was too tight, her eyes stinging, probably from all that kriffing smoke everywhere.
And where in the Force was Finn.
"I'm sorry," he continued, licking his lips, parched and bloody. He took in a shattering breath, flinching in what must have been pain, that brow furrowing for a moment back to its usual state. "All the rage, all the hate… Look where it got us. You. Me."
An explosion went off. Closer than she would have liked, as if in agreement with the man in her arms, rattling her teeth and deafening her ears. She found herself hunched over his body, the dust and debris settled on her back and hair. Her hand caressed the dust off his tresses and touched his cheek, the one with the scar she had gifted him once, now barely visible under the dirt and blood covering his face.
"Ben… I…" she swallowed, the words at the tip or her lips not made for this moment. Because if she uttered them now, it would feel like letting him go. She laced her fingers in his. He had to stay. Stay and hear them whispered someplace…else. Far away from here. Under a starry night or…
"I love you," he said, his voice thick. His eyes searching her face and landing softly on hers. A rare smile barely visible, fleeted from his features. It made her chest clench, shattering her resolve.
Gods, not here. Not like this. Not with the whole world crashing around us.
Her vision blurred. Wetness trailed down her cheeks and trickled on his temples. His lids fluttered closed.
Don't go.
Please don't leave me.
Please…
"I know," she heard herself whisper back.