When he looked at her, he saw Noodle, but that's not what she processed.
She saw a man, looking at her, like a he would a lover to his lady, and deep in her system she felt a stirring that she couldn't place.
He would talk to her, for hours, she would listen, she was a good listener. He would tell her about his day, about his plans for the future, many topics would be covered. He would schedule practices and they'd spend hours together playing music for each other.
Then there was the first time he'd kissed her. She had felt like her synthetic skin was on fire. He had been drinking heavily and when she came in he went right up to her and lay his lips on hers. "Noodle, Noodle, I love you so much." He shuddered, tears pouring from his eyes. The cyborg could do nothing but stand there, attempting to configure how to react.
She would sing for him, too. He'd ask her to hum or recite a song and she would obey. He could sit for hours at a time listening to DARE over and over again. When he talked though, she knew she was only a stand-in, a shell for him to gaze at. Like a picture, you would never love a picture, you love the person in it. It was the same with her situation.
Whenever he was drunk he would sit on the beach with her, explaining all the wonders of the world, his arm around her shoulder, kissing her cheek and telling her how beautiful she was. The android would smirk, for she knew not how to smile, and nod.
"Murdoc," she had said on one occasion.
"Yes Noodle-luv?" he would slur.
"I am not Noodle." And he would recoil from her as if he'd been slapped. But he was only remembering, realizing that her statement rang true in every form. She learned never to do that again.
Despite being just an object that was being admired, she relished the attention, feasting on it. She would encourage him to drink, so that she could blur the lines of reality, allowing those nights on the beach.
Murdoc was all too willing to forget, to forget about everything, and pretend that the thing he was holding was Noodle and not some android he'd built to fill the empty space.
Sometimes he would look at her when he was sober and start to cry, then he'd get mad and throw things and scream and shout. She would hide from him, remembering the time this had happened and she'd been in his way:
"M-Murdoc-"
"DON'T!" he bellowed. "You! Stop making me forget her! Stop!" he shouted, grabbing her by her neck and throwing her into a couch.
Her back arched, surprised that he would show such an act of violence. He raised a shaky hand to point at her. "Y-y-you're not real. I made you! You're NOT REAL!" he screamed.
He was her creator, and she respected him as her God, her deity, if nothing else. She followed orders, not because she had too (as Murdoc had believed), but because she chose too. She was more human than she let anyone think.
Emotions were new to her, but she still experienced them, and whenever she looked at the bassist she felt love, love for all he'd done for her, love for all those kind moments he'd expressed. She also felt envy, bitterness, anger, and denial, because she knew it wasn't him he shared those moments with, but the Japanese woman she was modeled after.
Then this woman returned. Murdoc was in the kitchen with her, drinking a beer when he spotted her and the drummer. He'd dropped the beer and raced outside, embracing the small figure, crying and murmuring things to her. The cyborg felt hate then, hate for this person, for taking the only kind thing in her life away.
Murdoc, seeing no need for the cyborg anymore, had ordered her to self-destruct.
"We don' need two guitarists." He'd explained. She had looked at him with cold, calculating eyes, and shook her head no.
"I-I love you." She had whispered. His eyes had widened and he stood up.
"No you don't," he said firmly. Then he had turned her off.
The android was buried underneath the house, all of Murdoc's previous favor towards her gone now as he oversaw the digging himself, holding the real Noodle in his arms. And there the robot was left, but they didn't know she was still alive.
When she managed to turn herself on again she realized what had happened and she tore her own batteries out, because life without love was no life for her.