Olivia Benson slammed the door to her apartment shut, harder than necessary. Dropping her bag and kicking off her shoes, she fell to the couch, one arm draped over her eyes, as if to shut out all the bad things she had seen. But she couldn't. She couldn't escape the horrors of her job. Each and every atrocity played itself over and over again on the backs of her eyelids.
"What am I doing with my life?" She wondered out loud. Her apartment was dark and it was fairly cold. The clock on her cable box blinked at her. Olivia watched as the time ticked, slowly, from 12:45 to 1:00. Olivia willed her eyes to close, but nothing she could do would shut out the horrific images she saw.
Sometime around 1:05 she sat up and fumbled for her cordless phone. Her fingers were held over the oh so familiar numbers. Numbers she had dialed a million and ten times over twelve years of partnership. Two years ago she would never have hesitated to call, but then again, she wouldn't have had to call. He would've known. He would've been there. And that hurt. That hurt more than the images that wouldn't go away. That hurt more than any beating a perp could give. Olivia sighed and rested the phone back in its cradle. She couldn't call him out of the blue. Not when so much time had passed.
Besides, she rationed to herself, what if he had gotten a different number? Or what if he was away? Or even worse, what if Kathy picked up the phone? No, Olivia shook her head firmly; she would not be calling Elliot Stabler tonight. If she ever did again.
A/N: Okay I know this is short, but I had this idea and it needed to get down on paper. If I get a favorable response to this, I will definitely continue. (Let's face it, I'll probably continue it anyway, but that shouldn't stop you from reviewing) I've been on a L&O:SVU kick lately and I really wanted to write this for some reason. Um, so please review and tell me what you think. :)