Disclaimer: I don't own TRIGUN so don't sue, If I did do you think I would be writing fics.
Summary: What happens when Vash and Wolfwood gets a summance for jury duty? You're about to find out!
Super funny for those who are sick and twisted. *Rated R for launguage and violence*
Vash and Wolfwood on Jury Duty
Chapter One: In Which the Idiots are Summanced
Created by: Lunar Dragon 001 and Divine Ragnorok EX
*Mei-City*
*Wolfwood's Room*
Wolfwood: ::Yawn:: Praise the lord for he has blessed me with a new day!
::Knock Knock::
Wolfwood: Ah...who the hell is that this early in the morning...
::Knock Knock::
Wolfwood: I'm coming! Jesus Christ...
::Wolfwood finally opens the door::
Mailman Spanky: Sorry to disturb you this early in the morning, but I have a letter for Mr. Nicholas D. Wolfwood.
Wolfwood: That's me
Mailman Spanky: Good! Sign hear please ::muttering:: sexy
Wolfwood: Uh...Excuse me?
Mailman Spanky: Oh...Nothing. Just sign on this line.
Wolfwood: No problem ::While Wolfwood is signing the paper he notices the mailman staring at his chest::
Wolfwood: Um..what are you staring at?
Mailman Spanky: Your chest...is just so strong and muscular...so sexy!
Wolfwood: So...your gay?
Mailman Spanky: Oh yeah... If I wasn't on duty I wouldv'e jumped your bones by now!
Wolfwood: GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mailman Spanky: Calm down cutie
Wolfwood: YOU FLAMING HOMO!!!!!!!! ::Wolfwood picks up his gun::
Mailman Spanky: OMG! OMG! HE'S GONNA SHOOT ME! ::high pitched girl scream::
Wolfwood: And take this with you! ::Throws his gay puple clipboard at him::
Wolfwood: Degenerate son of bitch...anyways what's this letter about?
Dear Mr. Nicholas D. Wolfwood,
You have been chosen to do jury duty along with eleven others. The case and further
information with be disscused at the meeting which is tommorow at the Mei City Court. However if you do
not attend YOU WILL BE HUNTED AND PUT IN JAIL WHERE OUR TEAM OF SPECIALLY TRAINED
GUARDS WILL HAVE THERE WAY WITH YOU IN THE MOST HORRIBLE WAYS POSSIBLE ^_~.
Hope to see you there! ^_~
Sincerly,
Bobby Bob the III
Wolfwood: Jeez, is everyone gay now a days. Well I might as well go after all... I don't wanna get ass raped.
*Meanwhile in Vash's Room*
Vash: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh...nothing like donuts for breakfast.
::Knock Knock::
Vash: Coming! I'll be back my beloved donuts.
::Vash opens the door::
Muscular Mailman Mitch: Letter for a Mr.Vash The Stampede
::Vash stares at him with an odd expression::
M.M.M: What chu lookin' at! YOU THINK I'M A BITCH! STOP LOOKING AT ME OR I'LL FUCK YOUR NARROW ASS UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Vash: JEEZ MISTER! STOP THE FUCKING YELLING! See now you have me, a peace loving gunman cussing.
M.M.M: Woah! You never said you had a gun, you wanna see my gun...
Vash: Sure why not?
::Muscular Mailman Mitch unzips his pants::
Vash: WOAH! WOAH! WOAH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!!!!!!!!!!
M.M.M: You said you wanted to see my gun.
Vash: Nevermind ::underbreath:: homo
M.M.M: What cha said?
Vash: Nothing... Can I get my letter now?
M.M.M: Sure, sign here please.
::Vash signs the paper::
M.M.M: Here ya go, have a great day sugar, bye!
Vash: The first person that was truly intrested in me had to be gay...anyway what's this?
::Reads the same letter as Wolfwood recieved::
Vash: Well... I haven't gotten laid in years...but those are guys that would ass raped me... so I'll go......... or maybe.
*The Next Day At The Entrance Mei City Court*
Wolfwood: Man why the hell did they call me for jury duty? I'm a traveling priest for christ sake, I have no time for this
::Wolfwood looks around and spots Vash::
Wolfwood: Son of a bitch look who it is...HEY VASH!!!!!!!
Vash: Hey Mr. Priest man, what are you doing here?
Wolfwood: Ah...I have jury duty, what about you?
Vash: Really! Me too, yes god I won't be alone!
Wolfwood: ...Okay
::Silence::
Vash: Hey Wolfwood...can I ask you a question?
Wolfwood: What,Why they would call us for jury duty?How they got us when we have no real residence? What kind of case are we trying against?Or why my mailman was trying to get at me?There all good questions.
Vash: Ummmm....No... ...Just what the hell is a Muppet? I mean people call them Muppets but their puppets
so why don't they just call them puppets like they are...just what does the m mean in muppet.
Wolfwood: That has been on your mind all night?
Vash: Yeah.
Wolfwood: Well I guess the Muppet means Mofo Puppet.
Vash: Yah that's it! I mean they are pretty mofo-ish.
Wolfwood: ...Right... Anyways let get a move on.
End of Chapter One
Lunar: Well I think I stop here for now, I'm getting tired. That okay with you Vash and Wolfwood?
V and W: Yeah Ms. Lunar
Lunar: Good (Those two are my bitches)
Divine: Anyways the next chapter is called Deliberations.
Everyone: See ya.
Summary: What happens when Vash and Wolfwood gets a summance for jury duty? You're about to find out!
Super funny for those who are sick and twisted. *Rated R for launguage and violence*
Vash and Wolfwood on Jury Duty
Chapter One: In Which the Idiots are Summanced
Created by: Lunar Dragon 001 and Divine Ragnorok EX
*Mei-City*
*Wolfwood's Room*
Wolfwood: ::Yawn:: Praise the lord for he has blessed me with a new day!
::Knock Knock::
Wolfwood: Ah...who the hell is that this early in the morning...
::Knock Knock::
Wolfwood: I'm coming! Jesus Christ...
::Wolfwood finally opens the door::
Mailman Spanky: Sorry to disturb you this early in the morning, but I have a letter for Mr. Nicholas D. Wolfwood.
Wolfwood: That's me
Mailman Spanky: Good! Sign hear please ::muttering:: sexy
Wolfwood: Uh...Excuse me?
Mailman Spanky: Oh...Nothing. Just sign on this line.
Wolfwood: No problem ::While Wolfwood is signing the paper he notices the mailman staring at his chest::
Wolfwood: Um..what are you staring at?
Mailman Spanky: Your chest...is just so strong and muscular...so sexy!
Wolfwood: So...your gay?
Mailman Spanky: Oh yeah... If I wasn't on duty I wouldv'e jumped your bones by now!
Wolfwood: GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mailman Spanky: Calm down cutie
Wolfwood: YOU FLAMING HOMO!!!!!!!! ::Wolfwood picks up his gun::
Mailman Spanky: OMG! OMG! HE'S GONNA SHOOT ME! ::high pitched girl scream::
Wolfwood: And take this with you! ::Throws his gay puple clipboard at him::
Wolfwood: Degenerate son of bitch...anyways what's this letter about?
Dear Mr. Nicholas D. Wolfwood,
You have been chosen to do jury duty along with eleven others. The case and further
information with be disscused at the meeting which is tommorow at the Mei City Court. However if you do
not attend YOU WILL BE HUNTED AND PUT IN JAIL WHERE OUR TEAM OF SPECIALLY TRAINED
GUARDS WILL HAVE THERE WAY WITH YOU IN THE MOST HORRIBLE WAYS POSSIBLE ^_~.
Hope to see you there! ^_~
Sincerly,
Bobby Bob the III
Wolfwood: Jeez, is everyone gay now a days. Well I might as well go after all... I don't wanna get ass raped.
*Meanwhile in Vash's Room*
Vash: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh...nothing like donuts for breakfast.
::Knock Knock::
Vash: Coming! I'll be back my beloved donuts.
::Vash opens the door::
Muscular Mailman Mitch: Letter for a Mr.Vash The Stampede
::Vash stares at him with an odd expression::
M.M.M: What chu lookin' at! YOU THINK I'M A BITCH! STOP LOOKING AT ME OR I'LL FUCK YOUR NARROW ASS UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Vash: JEEZ MISTER! STOP THE FUCKING YELLING! See now you have me, a peace loving gunman cussing.
M.M.M: Woah! You never said you had a gun, you wanna see my gun...
Vash: Sure why not?
::Muscular Mailman Mitch unzips his pants::
Vash: WOAH! WOAH! WOAH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!!!!!!!!!!
M.M.M: You said you wanted to see my gun.
Vash: Nevermind ::underbreath:: homo
M.M.M: What cha said?
Vash: Nothing... Can I get my letter now?
M.M.M: Sure, sign here please.
::Vash signs the paper::
M.M.M: Here ya go, have a great day sugar, bye!
Vash: The first person that was truly intrested in me had to be gay...anyway what's this?
::Reads the same letter as Wolfwood recieved::
Vash: Well... I haven't gotten laid in years...but those are guys that would ass raped me... so I'll go......... or maybe.
*The Next Day At The Entrance Mei City Court*
Wolfwood: Man why the hell did they call me for jury duty? I'm a traveling priest for christ sake, I have no time for this
::Wolfwood looks around and spots Vash::
Wolfwood: Son of a bitch look who it is...HEY VASH!!!!!!!
Vash: Hey Mr. Priest man, what are you doing here?
Wolfwood: Ah...I have jury duty, what about you?
Vash: Really! Me too, yes god I won't be alone!
Wolfwood: ...Okay
::Silence::
Vash: Hey Wolfwood...can I ask you a question?
Wolfwood: What,Why they would call us for jury duty?How they got us when we have no real residence? What kind of case are we trying against?Or why my mailman was trying to get at me?There all good questions.
Vash: Ummmm....No... ...Just what the hell is a Muppet? I mean people call them Muppets but their puppets
so why don't they just call them puppets like they are...just what does the m mean in muppet.
Wolfwood: That has been on your mind all night?
Vash: Yeah.
Wolfwood: Well I guess the Muppet means Mofo Puppet.
Vash: Yah that's it! I mean they are pretty mofo-ish.
Wolfwood: ...Right... Anyways let get a move on.
End of Chapter One
Lunar: Well I think I stop here for now, I'm getting tired. That okay with you Vash and Wolfwood?
V and W: Yeah Ms. Lunar
Lunar: Good (Those two are my bitches)
Divine: Anyways the next chapter is called Deliberations.
Everyone: See ya.