Playerism 101 Chapter 1: Idiots and Jerks, a twilight fanfic

HI! This is my first fanfiction EVER so bear with me lol I accept any kind of criticism whether its good or bad^.^ Please give this story a chance!!

Read on:)

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Men and women are so different, don't you think? You would think they are completely different species if it weren't for the almost exact anatomy we share. Nevertheless our minds seem to function so differently. While guys look at women in a lustful, dirty way, we women look at men in an interested, curious way. We seem to have completely different concepts about each other and our capabilities. Men see themselves as the higher power, higher strength and women as easy to charm, and fragile. Women see men as stupid and very likely to commit a mistake but still irresistible while we see ourselves as smarter, handier people.

I have been called a feminist before. How can I not be if I'm surrounded by idiots and assholes all the time. All men are the same, or at least that's what they show me. Okay maybe not all guys share the same idiotic ways and maybe there's a teeny, tiny probability I'm being too drastic here. In my defense no guy has shown me otherwise. Well then again I'm merely just a junior student in a small high school surrounded by hormone-struck teenagers who can't get a grip out of themselves.

I think my feminist ways were first introduced into my system since I was very little, probably 5 or 6. My parents divorced when I was 5, and ever since my mom has told me constantly that guys are fools and that I shouldn't let any guy play with me. I misunderstood of course and I wouldn't let boys play with me when I was little. I would run off screaming when some little boy would come to me in the playground to play. Renee, my mom, is incredibly loving and caring and a helpless romantic. She has dated a lot of men ever since she divorced my dad, Charlie. All of them end up breaking her heart, they act as the perfect boyfriends for months then they would just dump her. She would be destroyed and I'd have to make her feel better. You know bringing ice cream and reminding her guys are jerks.

I believe all the good guys are either taken or gay. I mean the only real honest guys I have ever met are Emmet McCarty and Jasper Hale. They are the boyfriends of my best friends, Alice Cullen and Rosalie Hale. They have always stayed loyal to them even though the whole female population of West Coast High School and beyond flirt with them shamelessly. Emmet is the big goof behind the huge mass of muscles he is made of. He has brown curly hair with chocolate brown eyes; he is incredibly nice and very protective over his friends and family. Jasper is blonde with piercing blue eyes that seem to read your soul. He has a way of getting you into a good mood and making us feel better when we are upset. He is not scandalous like Emmet is but he is definitely a goof nevertheless and a romantic.

"Hey Bella!" I heard somebody scream from outside my car followed by an unstoppable knocking on my window side. I found an impatient Alice thumping furiously at my window as I turned off my car. As soon as I got out of my car, she threw herself at me. "Bella! I haven't seen you since forever!" she said never letting me be free of course.

"Alice I saw you yesterday," I frowned; she could be so dramatic sometimes.

"Just yesterday?! Anything could have happened after school! You could have fallen down and broken your leg, or fallen off a cliff, or gone to China, or met the love of your life!!" she said all on one breath, her eyes seemed to be about to pop out, she looked really funny.

"Shhhhh Alice! Don't say that out loud!" I told her as I covered her mouth. "I got to tell you something very, very important."

"What? What!" she muffled as my hand was still placed on her mouth. I leaned in and whispered, "I actually met a guy who I think I might like." Her bag fell off her shoulders and onto the floor. Her mouth fell open and her eyes were wide in shock.

"OMG!" she squealed as she started jumping up and down in excitement. "I was just kidding, I just wanted to see your reaction," I said as I laughed at her mad face. Okay now I was starting to get a little scared, she looked furious. She started hitting me with her text books furiously.

"DON'..AGAIN." she said as she hit me, harder every time. "Coward!" she shouted as I ran out of the school parking lot and into the school building.

I kept running without looking were I was going when I hit onto something, hard. "Ow," I groaned as I fell right on my butt. "Sorry Bella, didn't see you coming," I heard the voice of my pissed best friend's boyfriend. "Oh Jasper just the person I was looking for! I need you to calm Alice down!" I pleaded.

"Do I want to know?" he asked with a smirk.

"Probably not," I laughed, "but she's coming to get me so I got to go. Bye!"

I continued running anyways because I was late for first period. Just to my luck the bell rang when I was right on the doorway to Mr. Torres Literature classroom.

"I'm glad you decided to join us Ms. Swan," he said with an upset tone. I just nodded and walked hurriedly to my seat next to Rosalie. Her long, blonde hair cascaded over her shoulders and big blue eyes looked at me with curiosity. I was never ever late to class.

"What is this? Bella Swan late to class?" Rosalie said in mock shame. "What is your explanation, Missy?"

"Alice," I said. She smirked at me. I rolled my eyes at her and paid attention to class.

The first four periods of class went by fast. English Literature was just talking about Pride and Prejudice. Gym was a lot of fun, although Emmet mad sure that I wouldn't be on the reach of the basketball. He would hold up the ball high on his hand, and me being 5'5 and him being 6'1 I couldn't reach it. But it was fun because I got to hit him, he didn't seem to be hurt by it but I think he was just faking it. I had a Trigonometry pop quiz but it was easy, thank God. US History was easy, just taking notes. And now finally lunch time.

I entered the cafeteria and saw Alice calling me from the line. I was glad she wasn't upset anymore. "Don't think I have forgiven you yet," she said. I groaned and smiled sheepishly at her. "Come on! Don't be mad at me! Pretty please," I said trying to sound innocent, "If you forgive me I will bake you brownies," I said temptingly.

Her eyes widened with love, "Would you do that for me?" she said hopeful.

"Of course, little pixie," I knew she hated that nickname but it suit her so well. She glared at me.

"I love you!" I told her as I hugged her.

"Move it!" Jasper pushed us, "We want food!"

"Yeah I'm starving here!" Emmet said while rubbing his stomach.

"How can you eat so much yet maintain your muscles and abs intact?" Rosalie asked Emmet while she shook her head in disbelief.

"We exercise a lot, don't we Rosie?" he smirked as he wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed her on the lips.

"Okay… too much detail," Alice said as she kept walking in the line.

We got our food on our trays; Emmet's and Jasper's trays were almost over loaded with food. We sat on our usual table and started eating and gossiping and throwing food at each other like always. The bell rang and I started walking to my next class, Biology. As I walked in I saw the ass of a partner that I have. Edward Cullen was sitting down on the stool playing with the hair of some idiot girl who thinks he would actually change for her. I could see him winking at her and telling her she was the most beautiful girl he ever met, just like he had probably told some other girl earlier today. I coughed to let them know I was here and I didn't enjoy the spectacle but they didn't even acknowledge me. What a shocker, I thought to myself. I just put my books and bag on the table and sat on my stool besides the jerk and waited for the class to begin.

"Good afternoon class!" Mr. Banner greeted us with his usual excitement for class. You can just tell he really enjoys science.

"Hey Bella," Edward acknowledged me in what was obvious his seductive voice and winked. You have got to be kidding me. I just smiled shortly not even looking at him. He passed me a note, how childish is that.

It said: you look hot ;)

I wrote back: save it.

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xoxo cristina