spin those beautiful lies
You aren't cheating on anyone - that's what you tell yourself. When you're deep in a make-out session with Draco at the back of the dungeons and you feel a little nagging voice in your head telling you to stop, that is what you say to it. I am not cheating on anyone. I am not officially with anyone.
(Draco is, though, that irritating, nagging voice replies. Draco's supposed to be with your sister.)
But you - just - can't - stop.
He pulls you in and you pull him, and you're attracted like magnets. (Magnets lose their magnetism over time, honey.) He tells you he loves you and he means it - you say the same thing back to him but you aren't sure if you're telling the truth. There's a little part of you that still remains loyal to Astoria; a little part of you that wants to come clean with everyone and get Draco to publicly confess his love for you. (That's what he'd do if he truly loves me, wouldn't it?)
But no. When he takes his clothes off and unbuttons yours, everything else, every insecurity is forgotten. You don't remember wanting to talk to him about coming clean anymore. All you want is more, more, more. You're like animals, staring into each other's eyes with lust, lying on the floor without anyone noticing. So simple. So primitive. But this is what you want. This is what you need. This is what keeps the both of you going - and it pleases you, that you have the ability to make Draco want you in a way that Astoria cannot.
And you've always wanted to show that you can do better than her. You've always wanted to outshine her, maybe for a little while, just a day. Anything to make your relatives look at you as something other than 'Astoria's baby sister'. Anything to make your friends crave your attention more than the haughty, devastatingly beautiful Astoria's.
This doesn't help these already-complicated matters at all. No, not one bit.
(And everyone else is going have to know about you and Draco to admire you for it, shouldn't they?)
But every single time, you find that the easiest thing to do is just to forget about all that and focus on the moment; on Draco and his shirtless body. On the feeling of pure, primitive perfection that follows. On the way you simply lie there for a while, your breathing synchronized - those moments when you really feel like you're in this relationship because you love him, not because you want to show the world that you're better than Astoria or anything selfish of that sort.
The thing is, though, that that is all you do. You don't tell anyone. You don't talk to him about telling anyone. You know you've trapped yourself, deep down inside. But you lie. You lie to yourself that everything will carry on this way, and you will stay young forever. And nobody will know. You don't even try to get yourself out of this hole you've dug for the two of you. (But he's got someone that might be able to pull him out. He's got Astoria. And you have nobody.)
You spin a beautiful lie that you're both magnets that will never stop being attracted to each other, you're going to stay together forever and ever and ever. But this isn't a fairytale, sweetheart. And people pull magnets apart.
It goes on. And it will go on. And you won't be able to stop it, because you really are no better than Astoria - she will win him over eventually, and the day will come when he won't want to be with you any more because your sister's figured out how he works. The day will come when he says the words: Daphne, I'm sorry. The day will come when you lose your attraction, that magical magnetization.
You know this, don't you? You know that this can't go on forever, that this relationship is made of compromises and dark secrets and a beautiful lie, like a spider's web, that pulls you in and traps you and will be the end of you before it rots away, forgotten. You know this, in your heart of hearts, but you're just scared. You're just scared of everything. Scared of what will happen if Draco doesn't do anything, and scared of what will happen if he does.
So carry on, Daphne. Carry on with those lies. Carry on pretending that your magnets will never lose their power; that your spider's web of a relationship is going to last. Carry on dreaming. It will be the end of you.
Spin those beautiful lies, dear Daphne. Spin those lies.
a/n: for the pairing love competition, the honeydukes competition: fizzing whizbees and creatures of hogwarts competition: snake on hpfc.