A/N: The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus is one of my favorite band right now and I really like their song "Face Down" and this is where I got the idea for my songfic.
Disclaimer: And yeah. I do own neither Harry Potter nor Face Down. Harry Potter is JK Rowling's property and Face Down's RJA's. What I own here is just the idea and the story. I hope you'll like it. :)
FACE DOWN
Hey girl you know you drive me crazy
One look puts the rhythm in my hand.
Still I'll never understand why you hang around
I see what's going down.
Way back then, whenever I set my eyes on Lily Evans, I would see her face covered with lots of bruises. At first, I didn't have any idea where she got those. I thought it was just because she's clumsy or what. But I really couldn't stand to see her charming face like that. Yeah right. I like her. She's very attractive. But those bruises weren't.
One thing I was sure of that time, she would never like me back. I used to tease her often and she hated me for that. Plus, she has a boy friend then.
I remember one morning just a couple of months ago, she entered the classroom and told her best friends, Mary and Kimberly, the news, that she and Sean Wilkins, a Slytherin guy, were already an item. She was very happy telling them the news and I could see from her friends' faces that they were happy for their best bud too.
I wasn't though.
What made Lily fall for that guy Sean? I may admit that he's more good looking than me but I am smarter. He may be more masculine but I am stronger. What he only knew was just to brag about things. He's so boastful, like any other Slytherin jerks.
And for what I believe, I love Lily more than he loved her. I couldn't see from his eyes that he was sincere. He's a playboy.
He would cheat on Lily. I'm sure of that. I even told myself.
Cover up with make up in the mirror
Tell yourself it's never gonna happen again
You cry alone and then he swears he loves you.
And I wasn't wrong.
One day, while I was in the library, I saw her sitting on one of the chairs there while she was looking at her face in the mirror. She was putting make up. I was even smirking then. The library was not the place to put make ups. She must do it inside the lavatory. The library was made for studying.
Then when I went near her, I saw it clearly. She had bruises and scars on her face again. She's putting make up on because she was trying to hide it.
That time, I already gathered the courage to ask her where she got those bruises.
"Hey Evans, what's the matter?" I asked her.
"About?" she replied.
"About your face. About your bruises and scars."
"Oh, these bruises? Uh, I got these from –from –yeah, from practicing spells." She told me.
"Oh, I see." I said to her but I wasn't really convinced about what she told me.
Do you feel like a man
When you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
As your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.
Then this day came.
I was on my way to the Gryffindor common room when I heard a guy shouting and a girl screaming in pain.
I went to find where the noise was and not far away from where I am, I saw Sean and Lily.
"But I saw you kissing her! Passionately!" Lily shouted at him, crying.
"And so?! The hell you care if I was kissing someone?! You're just my girlfriend, Lily Evans! You don't care if I am flirting with another girl! Get a life!"
I couldn't believe that Sean could do that to her. I couldn't control my anger anymore and I went out to where I am.
"It's you who should get a life Wilkins!" I said.
"Potter!" they both shouted.
"What are you doing to her? Just pushing her around like that?! Just shouting at her and telling her stupid things?! Telling her that she is just your girlfriend and she doesn't care if you are flirting with other girls?! Shame on you, Wilkins! You don't deserve Lily's love!"
"Then who does? You?" he told me while he laughed.
"I am not saying anything like that! She deserves anyone but never you!"
He laughed harder while Lily was on the floor crying like a helpless kid.
She then shouted at the two of us, "Stop it!"
We stopped exchanging words with each other and looked at her.
"You, Potter! This is me and Sean's life! You have nothing to do with this!"
I couldn't believe it. She was still on Sean's side after all he had done to her?
"Lily! He's cheating on you! I knew it! And he –he's even hurting you physically! Will you just let this pass?! Break up with him! Tell this to Dumbledore! Hey!"
"I wouldn't. I love Sean so stay out of this! Come on now." She told Sean and they both walked away leaving me there alone.
A pebble in the water makes a ripple effect
Every action in this world will bear a consequence
If you wade around forever you will surely drown
I see what's going down.
My pals and I were eating breakfast at the Great Hall the next morning when Lily sat down next to her friends. I was looking at her with pity. How could she stand all those bruises? How could she stand to be with him? She's intelligent. How come she's so stupid when it comes to love?
"James? Is there a problem?" Sirius caught me staring at her.
"Uh –n –no! There isn't any problem. I'm –I'm okay." I answered.
"Oh come on, Potter! We all know you!" Remus told me.
"We know there's something bothering you." Peter said. "Tell us."
"I admit it. There's something bothering me. But guys, I must say, let yourself out of this for a moment. Or really, just let yourself out of this." I told them as I stood up on my chair and left them.
I see the way you go and say you're right again,
Say you're right again
Heed my lecture
I made my way to Lily's direction. I tried to talk to her but she just ignored me.
"Lily! Wait! Please talk to me!"
"What do you need from me?" she asked me angrily.
"Is this okay with you? Sean hurting you and all? Aren't you going to –"
"To what?! I already told you James! This is not your business! Who are you anyway?! Why are so concerned about this matter?!"
I wanted to tell her that any person who would know about that will be concerned.
But there's another reason.
I wanted to tell her how I feel for her. That I was concerned because I care for her. I don't want to see her being hurt. I wanted to tell her that I love her.
But I couldn't do it. I couldn't speak.
And then, Sean arrived.
"Lily, what is this guy doing to you?" he asked her.
"No –nothing. Let's go." She said and led themselves away from me again.
Do you feel like a man
When you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
As your lies crumble down a new life she has found.
After our Astrology class, Professor Sandra White, our teacher, made Remus, Sirius, Peter and I stay at the room.
"Can you give me an excuse on why are you late in class?" she asked me and Remus. "And you…" she said while looking sharply at Peter and Sirius. "Why didn't you do your homework?"
"Ma'am," I started to speak. "We were late because Professor McGonagall said something to us."
"And now you are blaming professor McGonagall for your irresponsibility?!"
"I –I'm not blaming her! You're asking us the reason why we're late and I'm just answering you!" I said.
"And now you're shouting at me?"
"I –" before I could even finish what I'm saying, she interrupted me, "I don't want to hear anything from you, Potter! Now all of you, clean the room! Without using your wands!"
"Oh man! What the hell is this?" Sirius whispered to me.
"You saying, Black?" Professor White asked him.
"No, professor. I'm not saying anything." Sirius said.
It took us three hours cleaning the room when Professor White permitted us to go. Remus opened the door and all of us went out of the room. Not far away from where we were standing, we saw two familiar figures kissing in the dark.
"Do you see what I see?" Sirius asked us.
"Yes. I do." I said right away. "And this isn't right." I immediately went near the two people kissing.
"Aren't you ashamed on what you are doing?" I asked the guy as I punched him on his face.
"Stop that!" the girl, who's named Louisa, a Slytherin girl, told me.
"No. It's you two who should stop this! Hey, Wilkins, are you really human?! How could you cheat on Lily? You always keep on repeating this!" I said to the guy who was Sean.
"Know what, it's really obvious that you have a thing for Lily." Sean started saying. "But why can't you find it obvious that for me, Lily's just a toy! I'm just playing games with her! It is just her who's taking it so seriously!"
"How could you –" I said, wanting to punch him again. Harder than the first one.
Face down in the dirt she said this doesn't hurt, she said I've finally hurt enough.
Face down in the dirt she said this doesn't hurt she said, I've finally hurt enough.
One day she will tell you that she has had enough, it's coming round again.
Then all of a sudden, we heard a loud cry from somewhere. We were all surprised when we saw Lily standing on a corner.
"Lily!" both me and Sean called her.
Lily was looking at Sean while her eyes were very red from her tears.
"I heard everything." She told him silently.
"Lily! Let me explain!" Sean held her arms but Lily ignored him and ran away.
Do you feel like a man, when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
As your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.
I looked at Sean sternly then my buddies and I left him and Louisa. We went to the common room, thinking that maybe she's there but she wasn't. We went to find her all over Hogwarts and saw her at the Astronomy tower.
"Lily…" I called on her.
She didn't answer. I told my friends to go back to the common room and they did. When I was left with Lily alone, I went to sit beside her. After a long silence, she spoke.
"James…"
"Yes?"
"I'm sorry." She said.
"What are you sorry for?" I asked her.
"For not listening to you. You were so concerned about me but I wasn't listening. I was even on his side and not on your side."
"Oh, that? It's okay. I know you really love him and because of your love for him, you've been blinded."
"Yes. I am. And how stupid of me."
"No, don't say that."
"I am. I am really stupid. I hate this! I hate being stupid!" she said and started to cry again.
"It's not you who's stupid. It's him." I told her.
She didn't answer me. We were both silent for a long time when I told her that maybe we could already go back to the common room. She said yes and so we did. While we're on our way to the common room, we met Sean.
"Lily…" he said.
"What?" she asked him.
"I want you to listen to me."
"I told you awhile ago, Sean. I heard everything and I don't need any explanation from you."
"But Lily…"
"Sorry Sean. You don't know how much you hurt me."
Do you feel like a man, when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
As your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.
Today, whenever I set my eyes on Lily Evans, I would see how her cheeks are so red, I would see her eyes full of laughter and I would see her charming smile. She really is pretty. She is very smart and she's almost perfect. That's why I'm really proud that she's mine now. Yes. She's already mine.
And I promise her that I will not hurt her. That I will love her 'til the rest of my life.
Face down in the dirt she said, this doesn't hurt she said I finally hurt enough.