Hey, this is my first ever story so please read and tell me what you think or if you have any ideas! Thank you.

Disclaimer: I do not own Vampire Academy. This story is intended for fanfiction and entertainment purposes only. The Characters belong to Richelle Mead. I only own the plot.

1

Well, being in jail sucks, even more knowing that I'm innocent. The movies really do lie, I've got no ball to bounce back and forth against a wall, no book to read-even though I won't read it- but still I was utterly bored.

It is just exhausting, looking at a plain grimy wall and thinking. And oh God, did I have a lot to think about.

I'm going to get killed(executed) for something I didn't do even-for once- though it does seem to be me, I wouldn't kill any one for no reason. I only kill Strigoi.

The one person who fully understands me, has left me heart broken and completely confused it at the same time. How could he do that to me after everything i...we've been through. To then just throw me to the ground.

"Love fades, mine has"

How dare he say that to me, what a cocky line? And then goes and tries to defend me. He shouldn't even get the pleasure the help anyone especially me, no one gets away from hurting me.

Tatiana's note burned in my pocket. She always liked to give me news at the worst times. But as it's for Lissa I would do anything she asked.

Now I need to make the decision. Who can I tell? Who can I trust? Who has the power to do something about it? My first thought was him but I was not going to, he didn't want to know me or talk to me again. I thought about Abe but it just didn't feel right. So…

Sydney or Ambrose.

Sydney because I like her, I can trust her even if she hates my kind she was always there for me. Also she asked about Eric Dragomir files so she has to know more about all of this.

Ambrose because he was friendly with the Queen he knew her and he gave me the note which means he could know more. And I trust him, he's nice and he's hot.

And it went on and on. Just thinking, nothing else. I started to think about things I had done to hurt people I cared for. Turns out it was everyone I knew. I was a danger to anyone, everyone. I felt glad that their life's would be ridden of me, the cruel Rose Hathaway. I began to worry, what if I got out? What would I do? Leave probably. I couldn't. I wouldn't stay here.

I think I was like that for days, never moving, just thinking. I heard people come in and out but i didn't see their faces. I heard noises up stairs, sounded like arguing. I could feel Lissa' annoyance as they declined her again to be able to see me.

And within the days I became nothing just a statue staring blankly at the wall. I forgot about eating. I was a lifeless droid. I didn't need the life.

"Rose" "Rose"

I looked up startled, finally realising someone was talking to me. I looked up to see Mikhail.

"Oh…Hi" I croaked, realising I hadn't been drinking either.

"Rose" he said softly. "Hey, why aren't you eating? You need your strength, to survive this place" he's eyes poured out with worry.

"Sorry, I forgot, do you have any? I'm starved." I joked.

He smiled lightly "yer, I do" he showed me a tray full of food and to bottles of water. Yum, how could I forget food? God, that sandwich. My stomach grumbled.

I grinned and got up on to my feet roughly. Then quickly fell right on my ass. "Crap!"

Mikhail was by me in a second. "Rose, Rose. Are you alright?" franticly.

"Yer, I'm good. Just tired. Pass the food. Please, then I'll be fit as a fiddle" I gave him my fake smile.

He handed me the food. And I shoved it down. To then realising that was a mistake as it was all gone. I looked back up to Mikhail. "How long haven't I eaten?"

"Four and half days, Rose we are all really worried" he pointed behind him and I looked and smiled. The guards looked more relaxed but stayed in guardian mode.

"Wow, that's a long time. Nearly a record for me." He laughed sadly.

"Why would you starve yourself Rose? That's not the answer, you should be trying to get out, prove you innocents."

"I... I wasn't I swear! I...i just forgot, which is weird. Anyway no would believe I'm innocent, so there's really no point in trying. And even if I did get out, what would I do. I have nothing left in me to try anymore, it would be better for everyone if I was gone." I slumped back against the wall.

"Don't you dare say that! Don't you dare give up! Lots of people believe you. And life wouldn't be better. Rose, think of Lissa what about her?" he stared me right in the eyes, trying to make me see sense but I had already made my choice.

"NO! No. If I wasn't in her life, if I was gone her life would be better. I've hurt her so much, now everything that has happened to her was my entire fault. As well as everyone else I know. Really there are so many more reasons for me to go than there are to stay." Tears trying to force their way out.

Mikhail's eyes were full of emotion. "Rose don't talk like that, you have every reason to be alive and with Lissa. You've done so much for her already and for so many others. You have become a great person and have the most amazing life."

I just looked at the ground and didn't reply. No one would understand my reasons. He stayed for a long time just in silence , as he got up to leave and locked my cage back up( he opened it so he could get me up and give me food). I asked "Can I have a person to come see me or a phone call?"

He turned round "umm..sure we can arrange it. Do you want to see Lissa?" I shook my head whispering no. he looked surprise.

"Can I see Ambrose or call Sydney? Please" with a pleading look " an..and don't tell Lissa about who I want to see, I don't want her hurting from it." I suddenly realised she was upstairs waiting for Mikhail to give her info on me.

He nodded and smiled but it didn't reach his eyes "I'll try my best" with that he left.

After he left I went into Lissa' head. Which was overwhelming I hadn't been outside these was till now. Also her feelings. She was nervous, scared and worried. But annoyed as well that I hadn't eaten and at the guards for not forcing me to eat and for not letting her in to see me. A bit of anger from the darkness peaked up as she thought she , no one can let Rose die.

She jumped up and ran once she saw Mikhail come out.

"Is. Is she okay? What did she say? Can I visit her?" Frantically. Making me feel worse than I already do. I never knew she was this bad.

Mikhail sighed. That wasn't a good sign as he put his hand on her and led her to sit down. She stared to get anxious and yelled "What. What's happened?" the darkness is getting to her again.

Mikhail started to speak once he realised what was happening. " . don't worry nothing's happened. Rose is fine just a bit tired from not eating. She claims she forgot to eat. But she's completely clueless" ouch, that hurt. "she had some food and said she would look after herself" no I didn't. " she's upset about being in there and you know Rose she's very bored."

Lissa smiled, which pulled at my heart I really miss her.

Mikhail continued. " I'm sorry but you still can't see her, no one can. But she did ask for you." I smiled. I'm glad he kept to what I asked.

She nodded sadly. "ohh, I miss her soo much. I wish they would let me in, I just want to hug her, see her. But I'm glad she asked at least she hasn't forgot me." He looked down guiltily. 2 but hopefully soon she'll be out and cheering us up. Abe's trying his hardest to get her out."

I smiled and then left her head. A question came to my thoughts.

What would I do if I got out?

Just looking at Lissa made me feel guilty for thinking I should die. I wouldn't let myself die. Look what happened Sonya. Lissa would go crazy the darkness would take her away. I just couldn't let that happen to her.

If I do get out, I'll leave forever but I will always be in the background to help. Completely unnoticed like I will be for the rest of my life.