DEDICATED

Starring

-Billy Mays

-Tai Lopez

-Damn Daniel

-Kappa

-Narrator

ACT 1: The God Who He Is

Narrator: "This is a Story, all about how, my life got flipped turned upside down. Now i'd like you to take a minute, just sit right on your sheens.I'll tell you all about how I became the fresh prince of Oxi Clean.

Narrator Again: On a Cold Winter Night, Tai Lopez' Lamborghini breaks down and has to hitchhike back to his garage to read another book

Tai:*Gets out of the Lamborghini and checks the car* "Yep' she's done" *He thinks of what to do just as a strange car pulls up next to him*

Kappa: "Kappa" *he points to the back seat of his car as if to say "Get in*

Tai:"Wait, really? Are you serious?" *not knowing who this man is or why he would do something so generous as he hadn't met let alone seen the man in his lifetime "Well' I guess I can trust you, being so kind tova complete stranger" *he walks to the other side of Kappa's car and gets in* "Sweet ride you got here, you know how to get back to the Hollywood Hills?

Kappa: "Kappa" *forming a ? with his hand to signal yes*

Tai: "Sweet" *he looks at Kappa's gas meter and notices that it's nearly empty* "Hey, you're almost out of gas, there's a station just up ahead, I'll pay for you"

Kappa "Kappa" *forming a ? to signal yes and drives to the station. A man comes out of the building to fill Kappa's tank for him, to his suprise it's Billy Mays

Billy Mays: "HI EVERYONE BILLY MAYS HERE WHAT CAN I GET YOU"

Kappa: "Kappa" *he forms a 60 with his hands to signal $60 worth of gas"

BILLY MAYS: "THAT'LL BE 3 EASY PAYMENTS OF 19.99"

Kappa: "Kappa" *he points to the back of the car as to signal "get in" as Billy Mays fills the tank. Mays gets in the car and the trio head on their way.

Narrator: "Kappa drives for an unknown amount of time before stopping at a cliff. Tai Lopez had just finished reading a spare book he kept on him to increase his knowledge"

Kappa: "Kappa" *Kappa makes a gang symbol and drives off of the cliff and uses techniques never before see by mankind to escape the falling car, Tai Lopez dies from the car sinking but Billy Mays had some OxiClean on him and morphed into a Dolphin with the power of stain removal*

Kappa: *Now standing at the top of the cliff* "Kappa" *He turns and walks away leaving Billy Mays to wander as a Dolphin.*

END OF ACT 1.

ACT 2: The Return Of The Messiah

Narrator: Kappa having escaped the falling car and Billy Mays morhping into a Dolphin we turn to Damn Daniel and his White Van

Daniel: "Aha" *as he finishes cleaning the scuffs off of his new White Vans*

Kappa: *Kappa walks over to Daniels Van and gets in without other talk*

Daniel: "Damn Kappa, Why are you so wet" *looking at the sweat on Kappa's face and staring sexually* "Here, have some Vans, on me"

Kappa: "Kappa" *He takes the vans not knowing they are rigged with explosives and that Daniel was Muslim*

Daniel: "Hey Kappa, guess what" *He leans close to whisper* "Allahu Akbar" *The Vans blow up just as Daniel teleports away, Kappa cannot escape and dies from the explosion*

Billy Mays: *Billy arives back on land only to find out his senpai, Kappa has been killed* "DAMN YOU DANIEL, DAMN YOU TO HELL." *He trains for 10 years in a Buddhist Monk Temple and prepares to leave for the now active Yellowstone Supervolcano.

Narrator: "Billy Mays traveled to the Yellowstone Supervolcano to confront Daniel and kill him for taking the life of his senpai"

Daniel: "So, Mays. You've finally found me" *He summons a blade made purely from White Vans and assumes fight stance*

Billy Mays: "Yes, I have" *He summons a katana made out of OxiClean and yells "THIS IS THE OXICLEANS POWER" He assumes fight stance*

Narrator: "They fought until they had no more energy left in them, With his dying breaths Daniel managed to say "B-billy, I am... your father" just as the supervolcano erupted

Billy Mays: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" *The power of OxiCleans stain removal teleports him back to the Buddhist Monk Temple

Narrator:They say Billy Mays became one with the OxiClean but no one really knows where he is *Narrator shows his face to reveal he is actually Billy Mays "Oh, and that will be 5 Easy payments ot 19.99 for the story"

THE END