Chapter 1: Confusing emotions
Disclaimer: I wish I owned Skins but yeah stuff happens.
Effy's POV
"Do you want to forget about us" she is whispering in my ear as I am in my side. Trying to fall asleep on this uncomfortable spring bed. I'm trying not to care about her but I don't know why I am still here. This was suppose to be a one night stand. Her fingers walking up and down my spine giving me chills.
"Yeah I do want to forget because this was nothing" I say quietly without even turning to look at her. I am expecting her to jump off my bed by now and leave me. But she doesn't, she always has been the one to surprise me. And I don't get surprised easily I am Effy I don't care about what people think and say about me. I don't let people into my heart and I especially don't fall in love that's just not me.
"Effy?" she asks me like she doesn't know my name she sure does she was screaming it all night. But I'm not complaining about that I am complaining because for some reason. I am not leaving her for some reason I am still here talking to her. This was a one night stand we aren't suppose to remember each others name.
That's why I am trying to forget hers 'Emily' my mind keeps repeating over and over. I just want to shut it up I want to think that's not her name but it is. "What Emily?" I ask her and she turns me around I can see her smiling. Probably confused and that I even remembered her name. But I did and I never could forget it no matter how hard I tried. I just couldn't and it's confusing the hell out of me.
I always saw her around at school, I knew she was there because I knew she was really beautiful. And I don't say that much about girls. Actually she is the first that I have ever called beautiful or have had sex with. So yeah I guess that does make her kind of special. But I don't know why because I know it's not just her looks that lure me in it's more than that I know it.
Anyway at school I never tried to get to know her mostly because I knew I was too interested about her. So I held myself back I never ever have let myself get too attached to a person. And now that's what I am doing. And it's scaring the shit out of me, this isn't even me at all really. "I want you to stop pushing people away." she whispers so innocently that I can't get mad.
Even though I am trying to get angry it isn't working. "No, this is me I am sorry" I apologize but I don't apologize to anyone at all. She is changing me all in one day and I don't like it. The reason why I stay cold hearted and don't let anyone in. Is because love makes me weak and it hurts. Why do people fall in love if they know whey will get hurt in the end.
I don't understand anyone but yet no one understands me either so it's a good balance. Know Emily is fucking it up because she surprisingly understands me. No actually it isn't a surprise at all but I just wish she didn't. I guess that's what lures me in other than her beauty. But there's something else in her something that scares me because I am starting to care.
"It's Ok, Effy I don't want you to change anyway. You are perfect this way." She whispers and it scares me how I am smiling. "Thanks" I whisper back and I don't thank anyone. I guess Emily isn't just anyone.