Disclaimer: I do not own D N Angel, only this story belongs to me.
True Love Has No Happy Ending
Chapter One An Ending and A Beginning
'Dream itself is the shadow of reality'
- Anonymous
Harada Riku sighed. She sat up in her bed, drenched in cold sweat, her heart pounding hard and she was breathing in short gasps.
It was the same dream again.
She had the same dream for a week now, since her eighteen birthday. Sometimes, the dream would be slightly different. But it all involved the same person.
She quickly got up and took a cold shower to wake her senses up. She got out of the shower wearing a cropped denim jacket, tunic top and cargo pants. She didn't care much about fashion and dressing up, but Riku still wanted to look good and feel good.
She hurriedly got down; her sister was still dressing up. Ever since they had a free-dress code, Risa has been spending more time deciding on what to wear.
Riku shook her head. Her sister cared too much about appearance and what people thought. Riku grabbed a bowl and her favourite cereal.
She sighed again, her short auburn locks swishing as she dropped her head onto the table.
A blush stained her cheeks as she thought about her reoccurring dream. She clutched her face and wondered why she would blush over a stupid dream involving a certain person.
An idiotic person named Dark Mousy.
Really. She had no reason to dream about him, nor blush every time she thought about him. And she didn't have a strange sensation in her stomach every time she had a dream about him, nor would her heart beat wildly and she wouldn't feel… hot when she had dreams about that thieving person. Right?
OK. If Riku told Risa about her dreams, Risa would so totally strangle her for even dreaming about Risa's future husband as she puts it.
Besides, she was supposed to like Daisuke. He was her boyfriend.
Daisuke.
He was sweet. Charming and his boyish grin always made Riku smile and her legs would go weak at the knees.
His crimson eyes would always twinkle with delight when he looked at her. And how she loved running her hand through his soft soft hair.
Unusual purple hair.
Amethyst eyes.
Wings.
Black feathers.
"Riku? Daijobu?"
Riku nearly jumped. "Risa!"
Her sister was looking at her worriedly.
"What is it?" Riku asked mirroring Risa's look.
"Nothing. You just had a weird expression on your face." Risa said as she took Riku's bowl. "If you don't mind Riku, I'll just eat your cereal since you haven't touched it."
Not waiting for a 'yes', Risa had already ate the cereal and was in the process of drinking the milk left in the bowl.
Her sister ate fast. Contrary to the fact that she was a lady.
Riku groaned. If the dreams keep coming up, she'd die. She'd just die of embarrassment and humiliation.
She got up and told her sister she'd go to school first, she didn't really mind her sister snatching her food. She wasn't hungry anyway.
While Riku was cycling to her destination, her mind wandered off. Why was she having such strange dreams about the Dark Mousy? The Phantom Thief?
And right after her eighteen birthday too.
She wondered if her sister had the same dream as her. Maybe it was her hormones acting up.
Dark might be a pervert, but she couldn't deny the fact that he was hot.
But, Riku would never ever say that out loud. Not on her life.
The dreams haunted her every moment.
Dark Mousy.
The Phantom Thief.
Riku looked up to the blue sky above her and silently prayed that she would find out what her dreams meant soon.
xxx
Dark kept humming in the confines of Daisuke's head.
Oi. Stop that will you? Daisuke said mentally.
Stop what? Dark asked cheekily. He was enjoying irritating the younger boy.
Stop humming that stupid song! It's driving me nuts! Daisuke had nearly yelled out loud.
Ok.
Daisuke nearly fell down his bed in shock.
Since when did Dark agree with him over something that he didn't like Dark doing?
I'm not agreeing with you. Since I'm not humming, I might as well sing.
'Here's the one you
Cannot run from'
Oh Shit.
'It's everywhere you go
So go numb
Lift your head to see
It's all gone
Now lie there wondering
What have you done'
Daisuke groaned as Dark began to sing in a horrible off-tuned voice just to irk Daisuke.
'Here's the one I
Cannot run from
It smothers me and
Makes me go numb
Now you're finding that
You need some
Just pull the sheet
Above your head now'
Dark could sing well, and sometimes he sang in Daisuke's mind to pass the time. But now, he was singing in a horrible voice just to annoy Daisuke and Daisuke tried not to contemplate killing himself by suffocating his head with a pillow to drown the screeching voice in his head. He would so strangle Dark if it was even possible.
You do know that you're going to be late for school if you don't get up now. Dark supplied, his voice filled with humor.
The clock read 7.45 a.m. Classes started at eight.
Daisuke jumped off his bed and quickly changed to his usual white T-shirt and black slacks.
Shit. And double shit.
Late. Late. Late.
WHY DIDN"T YOU TELL ME DARK! Daisuke yelled in his mind as he grabbed his usual toast and ran out the door. Though he was in college now, Daisuke was still as clumsy as ever. "Itekimas!"
Well, you didn't ask. Besides, I don't need to wake you when you oversleep.
Daisuke ran as fast as he could towards where the station was. He had to hurry or he'll be late.
Oh God! Riku would be expecting him and he was late.
Hum di dum.
Shut up Dark. Don't act so joyful when I'm in trouble.
Why must I listen to you kid? Dark asked mockingly.
Cause if you don't…. Daisuke said menacingly.
He stopped short as he saw Harada Risa there too. His heart started beating hard. He felt flushed.
What is happening to me? I thought I was over her?
Apparently not. Since she grew up, her body has become curvier hasn't it? And she's becoming prettier.
Shut up Dark. You aren't helping. Besides, I love Riku. And I think she's pretty too.
Whatever. Feelings can change over time. The heart cannot forget.
That sounds like a song to me.
Now that you mentioned it…
"Niwa – kun! " Risa said waving. She was glad that she had came out a little late. It didn't matter, if she would be late to class.
Truth was, her heart hurt when Daisuke was with her sister. She didn't realize it before, but she had loved Daisuke and she had flung his love away.
And she had pretended that she still loved the Phantom Thief, to prevent any suspicions. She felt happy that her sister was happy and she didn't want to break her sister and Daisuke up just because she realized too late that she loved Daisuke.
They were so happy together.
The worst way to miss someone is when they're right beside you and yet you can't have them.
Daisuke had loved her. And she had thrown his love away for someone else who didn't even return her feelings.
Seeing Daisuke interact with her sister intimately really hurt her. But she kept a brave front, she had too.
Daisuke blushed when Risa grabbed his wrist. They boarded the crowded tram. Daisuke's heart thundered.
She really was pathetic. She tightened her hold on Daisuke's wrist as the tram began to rock slightly.
Why was he feeling this? He loved Riku not Risa. Risa had brushed him off years ago. But it was true, Risa had matured considerately and he felt some old attraction to her.
He shook his head, trying to calm his harshly beating heart. He felt just like before, when he was just a twelve year old kid trying to get Risa's attention. It would be bad if he changed to Dark in the tram.
On the contrary. It would be great. One could hear from Dark's tone of voice that he was smirking.
Daisuke just hoped that his little crush on Risa would be quelled soon.
He really love Riku and he didn't want her to get any wrong ideas about him and Risa.
Do you really love Riku? Asked Dark suddenly.
Of course I do Dark! Daisuke replied angrily. What sort of question is that?
Do you really? Dark said seriously, all traces of humor vanishing from his voice.
Do you?
xxx
Riku sighed. She was feeling a little frustrated this morning. She felt like her limbs were useless and was functioning wrongly.
Every thing she did felt insignificant. Wrong.
She felt restless. She felt so weak.
And the fact that Risa and Daisuke weren't here yet sickened her.
She knew that Daisuke had chosen her over Risa but she couldn't help feeling that Daisuke still loved her younger sister.
She couldn't help feeling inferior to her little sister. Risa was prettier than her. Cute and totally adored by the male population.
Riku was the tomboyish one. The athlete. The hot-tempered one. The plain one.
She shook her head. She laid her head on the table and considered bailing out of class today.
The dream had been intense and she felt drained.
"Sumimasen! I woke up late!" Daisuke's voice rang through her head. She looked up. Daisuke!
The she noticed Risa behind him. She sat up a little straighter. They weren't doing anything together were they?
"Gomen sensei! I lost track of time!"
What sort of excuse was that! Riku felt sad.
She knew it. She just knew it.
Daisuke had never gotten over her little sister. And Risa, she just had to snatch Daisuke away.
Riku felt bad for even thinking such thoughts about her sister but she felt sick.
The uncertainty. Her non-existent self confidence on her looks. Everything about Risa was so much better than Riku.
She was inferior to her sister. She was never as pretty. Never as sweet. She was the plain one. The friendly one boys' would think as their buddy, not as their girlfriend ever.
She felt even more queasy and ill as the moment passed. Daisuke could never love her the way he loved Risa. He had never even utter an 'I love you' when they were together. Just that slow sweet smile.
Now that she thought about it, Daisuke would always flinch slightly when she touched him. So slight she hadn't paid much attention.
Daisuke didn't love her. He had seen her as a replacement after Risa pushed him away.
He had never loved her. Those kisses they shared. Those intimate touches had been fake.
He had never loved her.
Not like…
Riku shook her head. The dreams aren't real.
Don't mix reality with dreams Riku!
The real Dark Mousy would never even think about her.
The dreams aren't real.
But the fact stung her. Daisuke may not know it. Maybe he had liked her, but one fact still remained true. Daisuke had seen her as a replacement.
A replacement.
It's sad to think you'll never be mine, but it's sadder to realize I knew it all the time.
She had tried to deny that fact countless of times.
But when she got ready for their dates, when she looked at the mirror, all she could see was Risa. She had denied that fact with every kiss Daisuke gave her.
With every gentle touches.
But she couldn't deny it much longer.
They might not have done anything. But Riku could see it in their eyes. Risa felt something for Daisuke but had never spoken out; and Daisuke, he had not gotten over Risa.
No one really gets over their first love anyway.
She trembled. Her eyelids felt heavy with unshed tears and her nose sting. She had to get away.
I'm trying hard not to cry over you because every tear is just one more reminder that I don't know how to let you go.
She saw the gentle touches her sister gave Daisuke as she momentarily held his hand, giving him a smile.
And she saw in his eyes pure adoration.
In her sister's eyes was love. Daisuke loved Risa still and Risa had learned to love Daisuke.
Riku was an intruder. She was a barrier between Daisuke and Risa. She was the wall between the two. She was a nuisance.
She was the monstrous person that separated Daisuke and Risa.
He had never spoken an 'I love you'; he had never actually shown that he cared for her well-being. Sure, he was caring. But, he was like that to everybody. He had never shown that extra love that was usually reserved for someone special.
He had never seen her with eyes filled with tenderness, devotion, and passion.
Never.
Daisuke looked around momentarily, and then catching Riku's eyes, he smiled.
Riku felt her heart breaking.
Daisuke turned his crimson eyes away and turned his attention to Risa whom was talking to the teacher.
I wonder if when you look into my eyes you see my heart breaking, or all the pain I'm in. And although you don't hurt me intentionally you still do, by all the things you never say and all the things you never do.
Daisuke had never seen her as her. He had seen her as the older twin. The replacement.
Not as Harada Riku.
Harada Risa's elder sister. A replacement.
How could she have thought that Daisuke would choose the plain Harada over the gorgeous one?
She had tried to deny that fact countless of times.
She could deny it no longer.
Daisuke had never loved her the way he loved Risa. Never.
She stood up as Daisuke and her sister took their seats.
"Sumimasen! But I don't feel well!" She then promptly grabbed her bag and fled the classroom.
And Dark had seen the tears she had tried so hard to hold, from Daisuke's eyes when Daisuke himself had not notice.
xxx
Oi kid. Let me out for a moment will ya. Dark said as politely as he could. He struggled to keep his composure. He was after all; the Phantom Thief and nothing could make him feel desperate, or even worried.
Except the image of a young woman with soft trails of tears sliding over a smooth cheek. A young woman named Harada Riku.
No! I have to study! My results have been plummeting and I have to bring my grades up! Daisuke had angrily retorted.
Didn't you see? Dark asked feeling absurd and was getting angrier by the moment.
When Daisuke frowned in confusion, Dark blew his top.
Are you blind kid? Riku was crying! And you're doing noting to comfort her you idiot! And you're supposed to love her didn't you? I saw her tears when you didn't. Are you blind! Dark had yelled. It was the first time in four years Dark had spoken to him like that.
"Riku? Crying?" Daisuke was stunned. He had looked at Riku as she left, not comprehending what had happen. But how could he miss seeing the tears that was on her face? How did Dark notice it when he didn't?
Riku was crying. That realization hit Daisuke square in his heart.
"Sensei! I have to go to the loo!" Daisuke ran out of class after receiving a nod from the disgruntled teacher.
"First the elder Harada, then the Niwa kid" grumbled the teacher.
Risa looked on worriedly. What was going on?
HHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhsdjdvk
Before Daisuke even made it out of the school, he had transformed to the Phantom Thief.
"Riku. Where are you? What caused those tears to fall over your delicate features? What has hurt you so?" Dark mused as he called With to his aid. And he flew to search for the girl that had temporarily filled his heart with emotions he had felt only once before.
xxx
Her whole body and mind was numb with pain. She dropped her bag. She didn't have the strength to hold onto anything. A throb ached agonizingly at her chest. It only increased with every step she took though. Still, she didn't stop. She couldn't. Tears trailed down her flushed yet pale cheeks. She wiped them against her sleeves, but they kept coming. She was glad they did.
Riku let the tears fall. She began to increase her speed. She ran and ran. Feeling the wind whipping her face. She closed her eyes. Not bothering to see what was around her. Not bothering if others were looking at her weirdly. She felt nothing.
Her lungs burned from the force of her running, the adrenaline coursing through her body, yet she wouldn't stop. Her muscles burned as well, begging to rest, the strain becoming too great. How, she wondered helplessly, could everything burn, when all she felt inside was a cold numbness? When her heart felt frozen solid? She kicked off her sneakers. She wanted to be in tune with nature, her only solace.
It had started raining. The torrents of rain had turned her path into a slippery mire which sucked greedily at Riku's feet. She fell several times and cut herself on the sharp stones. Despite the bleeding, she stumbled on like an automaton.
Her strength was fastly diminishing. Her limbs overwhelmed with weariness, were on the verge of impending collapse. Yet she moved like a hunted animal, mindlessly putting one foot in front of another, petrified by the awful sounds the thunder made and the bolts of lightning in the sky did nothing to suppress her fears.
Suddenly she stopped. She dropped to her knees. She gave in to the exhaustion.
She opened her eyes and found herself in an unknown place. A place she had never ventured before.
Fear only struck her heart for a moment before it gave way to hurt and pain. She felt the sobs racking her whole body. She wrapped her hands around herself. Riku was already drenched to the skin but she didn't care.
The tears came easily, mixing with the rain that was also sliding down the smooth planes of her face. The trees had sheltered her from most of the rain, but she was already soaked to the skin so she didn't really care.
She had loved Daisuke and had denied all the ugly facts about their relationship. She had loved him so so much.
I guess I thought we'd have forever. Another illusion I chose to create. Don't know what you've got till it's gone. And I found out a little too late.
Riku smiled bitterly.
Daisuke might have liked her a little. But she had wanted his up-most devotion. She had been selfish and this was her retribution.
Daisuke!
Daisuke!
I love you!
Did you ever loved me?
Did you?
I loved you.
So very much.
I had loved you since the beginning.
I did.
Daisuke.
Daisuke.
Riku laughed suddenly. A bitter laugh.
How could she have not notice the looks Daisuke gave Risa when he arrived at her house to pick her for their dates?
How did she miss Risa's love filled love to Daisuke?
Had she been so blind?
Ah well. At least her two best friends will find happiness together.
Even if it meant the shattering of her heart.
I only regret that I didn't mean as much to you as you meant to me.
The tears continued to flow.
And Riku cried.
Alone.
xxx
Dark felt even more uneasy with every passing moment.
No matter where he searched, he couldn't find Riku anywhere. Daisuke was thankfully silent.
"Riku!"
"Riku!"
How could he expect to hear her, the rain was heavy. Thunder booming and the lightning flashing. The strong winds were affecting him.
He had to land fast.
With transformed back to his cute self and Dark fell, not as graceful as usual. Tumbling through the trees.
"Shit." Dark landed on his back and he struggled to get up.
Dark! Daijobu?" Daisuke asked concerned.
Shut up and go back to the back of my subconscious and get lost. I'd like to search for Riku alone and I'll comfort her alone.
Daisuke yelled at the Kaito. I care for her too! And she is my girlfriend!
Well, from what I observed, you haven't actually treated her with love and care you know! And the reason she cried was because she couldn't stand to see your interactions with her little sister! Dark yelled back in his mind.
Guess what! You don't know what it means to love somebody so much that it actually breaks your heart to be apart from them! You have never known what it's like to love someone so deeply it hurts so much to see them sad, and you'd constantly want to make that someone feel special. Have you ever felt that way towards Riku? Do you know how much she loves you? I can always see it in her eyes. Those chocolate brown eyes sparkling so bright with her love for you!
Have you ever seen her for who she is? Have you?
Do you really know the meaning of love Daisuke?
Do You?
Daisuke was shocked to silence.
You have always used Riku! You never made her feel loved! You constantly eye Risa. When Riku does not appeal to you anymore, you turn your attention to Risa! At least I'm a harmless flirt. But you are a heartless two-timer!
Daisuke left the conversation. Coward.
Dark got up angrily, a frown marring his features.
He strode over to where With lay.
He was so angry he had nearly not notice the girl huddling on the grass, weeping her eyes out.
Her legs were filled with cuts and bruises, and she was shaking, trembling from head to toe.
Part of Dark was filled with relief, the other pain, and sadness.
He walked over to where she lay. He crouched down and he pulled her to his lap. She didn't resist.
She was like a broken doll, a human that has lost the purpose to live.
She had broke. And Dark had witnessed every moment that led to her downfall, yet he had done nothing.
Nothing to help her out of the illusion that she putted up.
She had wished so hard, hoped too much that when she fell, she fell hard.
She fell into the darkness that had claimed her.
Then he hugged her. Pulling her to a warm embrace. He murmured soothing words to calm her down.
She felt so cold. And all the while, she kept her eyes close. Her arms grasped his black shirt, and she continued crying. She was so beautiful, even when she was crying, her hair tousled. She was so beautiful.
She smelled of roses.
"How could you let a beautiful young woman cry for you like this Daisuke?" whispered Dark to himself.
Riku tightened her hold on him.
Dark slowly stroked her hair as she clutched him a little tighter.
Dark felt a pang in his heart.
Riku would cry so much for Daisuke whom has never appreciated her.
She would shed her precious tears for a useless man like Daisuke.
"Nothing is more painful, than realizing he meant everything to you, and you meant nothing to him," Riku whispered, her voice laced with pain.
Dark didn't know what to say. She had not opened her eyes and Dark was glad. He couldn't bear to see hurt and pain radiating from her beautiful brown orbs, alike yet unlike her sister's.
"I promise you, that no one will ever hurt you ever again. No one." Dark whispered fiercely as he pulled her even closer to him. "I promise, never to let you fall."
"I promise."
Riku smiled momentarily. Then she fainted.
xxx
She had felt so alone when someone had pulled her into a comfortable spot. She had not fought.
She had lost the will to do so. She just let the person do whatever they damned please.
Riku had felt so empty, felt a hollowness in her heart.
She felt so cold. So alone. Shrouded in the darkness.
She was so lost.
And then warmth. And soft murmurings.
She felt so safe. So very safe.
"How could you let a beautiful young woman cry for you like this Daisuke?"
Daisuke.
Daisuke.
The person stroked her hair gently, and she felt so loved.
Daisuke.
Have you ever loved me?
"Nothing is more painful, than realizing he meant everything to you, and you meant nothing to him," Riku whispered.
She remembered the fun times she had with Daisuke.
The sad times.
The trying times.
She had thought he loved her.
But it was all fake.
"I promise you, that no one will ever hurt you ever again. No one." The comforting person had whispered. She believed him. She felt protected and secure in this person's arms.
"I promise, never to let you fall." He had murmured, hugging her even more firmly.
"I promise."
Riku felt happy that someone cared for her. So very happy for that few words.
She smiled, and the darkness drowned her.
xxx
Dark flew through the late evening. He had taken time to search for her and then, they spent some time in the forest. After she fainted, he returned to Daisuke's house shortly to bandage her wounds. He had then taken off her soggy jacket and pants. It won't be good if she caught a chill. He had dress her up in a pair of shorts Emiko owned, which he 'borrowed'. He tried to take off the wet top she had on and closed his eyes as a gentlemanly act and had hurriedly pulled it off and pulled over a clean white shirt, Emiko had graciously bought him last time.
She was such a petite thing and she looked so vulnerable. If it was even possible, Dark wanted to squeeze the life out of Daisuke for even hurting her.
He flew back to her home and sneaked into her bedroom.
He laid her onto her bed and took one last glance at her perfect face. He honestly didn't think there'll be another moment like this again. She hated him.
The pervert as she called him countless times.
The thief.
The one not worthy for her love.
The greatest pain that comes from love is loving someone you can never have.
Riku hated him and loved Daisuke. Dark quelled his feelings of pain. How would she react if she knew Dark and Daisuke were one?
"Riku. What spell have you cast over me?" Dark said hoarsely as he stroked her cheek gently. She had an oddly beguiling mouth, her lips naturally rosy and rather wide, but not full. He kissed her gently.
"I will keep my promise. I will protect you."
Even if I cannot be with you. Even if my love will never be returned.
"I promised you, that no one will ever hurt you ever again. No one." Dark said stroking her hair.
"I promised never to let you fall."
And Dark had left.
Leaving a black feather beside her.
He would protect her. Even if he couldn't be with her.
Dark would always protect her.
And he would keep his promise.
Forever.
xxx
It was early in the morning, and it wasn't even light yet, when Riku awoke.
She slowly opened her heavy eyes and took in her surroundings.
She was in her room.
Riku was confused for a moment.
Then, memories of the day before filled her mind.
She had finally broken the illusion she placed upon herself. The walls of delusion that she built up, to prevent herself from seeing everything for what they really were.
They were built up so that she didn't have to confront the fact that Daisuke, her first love, her only love, had never loved her. Only her sister, Risa.
And Risa had learned to love Daisuke.
Riku didn't feel very sad anymore upon this realization.
She didn't hurt as much as before.
She felt tired of all the lies she had believed to protect her fragile heart.
She had to learn to let go.
And she would start by letting Daisuke be with her sister Risa.
She had felt so betrayed, so filled of pain yesterday.
Yet, she remembered being comforted by a promise.
Riku had felt loved.
Feeling safe and sound in a certain persons arms.
Whom was it?
She turned to her side.
"A black feather?"
She grabbed hold of it.
The feather was so smooth and soft.
There was no question to whom it belonged to.
Multi-lengthed purple hair swirling around.
Amethyst eyes that seemed to see past your soul.
So full of wisdom, profound and deep.
Wings.
Black wings.
And feathers floating.
An angel.
Riku held the feather close to her heart.
The Phantom Thief.
Dark Mousy.
She smiled.
'Were you the one who gave me that promise?"
"Dark?"
xxx
I originally planned this as a one shot. Should I?
I just got this idea in my head and couldn't resist writing it down, so sorry for delaying 'War Of The Worlds'.
Gomen. Please give me insights on what you think about this fic and tell me whether it should be a one shot or should I continue it.
Thanks! And please review!
Yours truly, Nicolet
xxx
edited. 30-12-2005